(screaming)
- Ahh.
♫ [Family] It's vlogmas, vlogmas
♫ It's vlogmas, vlogmas
♫ And it's time to celebrate
♫ Vlogmas. - Vlogmas.
- Good morning - Morning, everybody.
(laughs)
That was Rachel.
We are at my parents' house right now.
We're getting ready for the show,
and we're all just talking about what we need to do
in the show and it turns out
everyone has forgotten their choreography.
- No, I remembered.
It's toe tap toe tap
with a fake snap, toe tap, toe tap
- [Jessica] Like how she specified that toe?
- [Chris] Fake snap, real smile.
Do you know what, Parker?
You're eating your, what are you eating?
- Bagel.
- [Chris] A bagel? That looks delicious.
- I'm eating my bagel.
- Om nom nom.
- [Chris] Are you eating a bagel, too?
- [Bailey] I know mine.
- [Chris] Ooh, Bailey's got hers.
- Lift me up.
- [Chris] All right, sit down.
- Yo.
- Okay, so I stand corrected.
The kids and Rachel know all their choreography.
Mom's house is starting to look very festive.
We've got balls hanging here,
lots and lots and lots and lots and lots
and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots
and lots and lots and lots of snowmen.
And they got a tree, but I don't think it's decorated yet,
they just have lights on it.
Gotta do it.
- [Ornament] Ha ha ha, I'm packing my sleigh now,
so be sure to leave your Christmas wishes.
Wait for the jingle bells.
(jingle bells ring)
- Just brings back childhood, doesn't it?
All right, we are back stage now,
at the Granada Theater, in Santa Barbara,
and I just put Parker down for a nap, hopefully.
We tried to put him down for a nap at Mom's house,
but he didn't go to sleep,
so we brought a little Pack and Play crib here,
and now he's trying to sleep in one of the dressing rooms.
I'm going to go upstairs and see if they need any help.
(laughing)
- You got something.
- [Chris] Oh, I was filming.
Okay, so here's the deal.
We're doing this show. - [Rachel] I thought you were
talking to me. - No, I'm not talking
to you, Rachel.
Quit being so conceited.
We're doing this show once in Santa Barbara,
twice in San Jose.
If you're coming to the San Jose show
and you're watching this,
now you're probably gonna see some stuff,
some of my punchlines, and some jokes,
things, some surprises that you'll see
in the San Jose show,
but what I'd like you to do
is still act surprised when they happen.
That would just really help me out.
Looking good, dude.
(jazz music)
Oh, I didn't even notice you were in the frame.
I was getting a shot of this microphone here.
- Oh, I knew you were in the frame
and I really wanted you to--
- See you later.
- [Chris] Look at that Santa swagger.
(sped up Christmas music)
(actors talking amongst themselves)
Look who woke up.
It's Parker.
- Yeah.
- Did you have a good nap?
- Yeah.
- Are you ready to do the show now?
- Yeah.
- Yeah? It's gonna be fun.
So I'm supposed to pretend like I'm vlogging
in part of the show, but I'm gonna do it for real
because I'm a method actor.
(laughs) and that's how I do it.
This is the vlogging part.
- [Woman] You're in my vlog right now.
- Double vlogging. - Oh my god, look at this.
- I'm supposed to be fake talking, like this.
- [Announcer] The children were nestled
all snug in their, but their father
doing a cinnamon challenge
to boost his career.
- Okay. - Look at him.
(laughs)
- Hey, everybody.
- We're about to start the meet and greet.
I had to leave my camera backstage.
I accidentally set it down
and when I came back to get it,
they had shut down backstage.
That's something they do with unions and stuff,
they don't let people onstage
for a certain amount of time,
like the stage has to be locked and shut,
and that's what happened,
and so I couldn't vlog backstage.
So I'm really sorry.
Did it make you feel a little blue, Parker?
Yes.
- Sorry, he did that.
- You look really cold, you look like you're ice.
Are you cold? - Yeah.
- Can you pretend like you're cold?
Pretend like you're cold, oh.
Oh, so cold, it's so cold in this theater,
we're turning blue. - Yeah.
- Everybody, we just finished the meet and greet,
and we got some amazing presents from some of you.
So we're going to open them up
and check them out.
- Yes.
- Oh, from Megan, she gave us these
awesome Christmas decorations.
This one says Holiday Spectacular 2015.
And it says Chris and Jessica.
This one says Bailey on it.
That's super cool.
Holiday Spectacular.
And it has, what does it have on it?
- [Bailey] Light saber. - Light sabers.
- [Chris] And who do you think that one is for?
For you? And what's this one?
- [Jessica] Oh, this one's pretty cool.
- [Chris] This one says, "I'm with my family."
(Jessica laughs) - For me.
- It's for you, that's right, 'cause you always say that.
Those are so cool.
Thank you, Megan, those are awesome.
And then Vanessa gave us these.
She told us which one belonged to who.
Who does this one belong to? - [Bailey] Parker.
- [Chris] This one's Parker's, here you go, buddy.
- Yay.
- [Chris] This one is Bailey's.
And this one is Jacob's.
These are really cool, these missiles.
- Mine, mine, mine! - [Chris] You guys don't have
any of those ones, do you?
- No.
- [Chris] Oh, yeah, and she gave us these,
these are for you.
And that's your gingerbread hand sanitizer, Parker,
are you super excited?
- I got a elf.
- [Chris] You got an elf?
Cool.
- I want to open it.
- [Jessica] Mommy will help you open it.
- [Chris] Mommy will help you open it.
Don't open it without Mommy's help, okay?
- From Sophia.
- [Chris] Sophia gave you these presents.
Are you ready for Sophia's presents?
- [Jessica] PB and J, so you guys get to open it together.
- [Chris] That's for everybody.
(kids grunt)
Oh, working so hard, he's working so hard
he's squishing his pizza.
(kids laugh)
Parker, can you slide your pizza this way, buddy?
Slide it over here.
There you are, now get back in it.
Get back in it to win it.
- [Bailey] What is it?
- [Chris] What is it? "Big Book of Look and Look Again."
Oh, super cool.
- It's a searching book.
I love searching books.
- [Chris] Searching books are the best.
- That's for me, Dada, Mama?
- [Jessica] Yeah, this one's for you,
but let's watch Bailey first.
- [Chris] Those are so much fun,
have you ever played with one?
They're super fun, you're gonna like those.
Here, let me show everybody.
Flexipuzzles.
These are so fun, I've played with these in stores before.
They're great.
Ooh, this one's for Parker.
- [Bailey] I wonder what's in it.
- [Chris] He's getting it as far away
from everybody else as possible.
- [Bailey] He can't get the bow off.
Do you need help? Okay, I'll help.
- [Chris] Get in there, buddy.
Ooh, some socks, those are cozy looking socks.
And a Doodle Roll.
- [Jacob] What's a Doodle Roll?
- [Chris] It's a roll of paper that you doodle on.
Are you going to do some drawings and some coloring, Parker?
- [Jacob] Doodle?
- [Chris] Yeah.
- Presents.
- [Chris] Oh, super cool.
Look at that, Kylo Ren beanie.
Let's see it on, put it on.
- What about the tag?
- [Jessica] That's okay. - [Chris] Just throw it
on there.
(laughs)
That's awesome.
- [Kids] Thank you, Sophia.
- There's a bunch of kids outside.
They're very excited, they're ready for the show.
Don't bang on the glass too much.
(kids scream)
(laughing)
Go, go, go.
- I can't do it, - [Chris] Do it, do it.
- they're gonna break through.
- [Chris] Just say hi, go say hi, be nice to them.
(kids scream)
(laughing)
- All right, we have a five minute call.
I have to set my vlog camera on stage,
because it's part of the show.
It's a prop.
Kids are gone from the window,
that must mean the show's about to start.
Let's see if we can see them out in the audience.
(audience screaming and cheering)
- [Actor] But their father
doing a cinnamon challenge
to boost his career.
- Ooh, ah.
(screaming)
Check out these kids' outfits.
Jacob is a nutcracker,
Bailey is Clara, very lovely dress.
- You have a tutu.
- I do have a tutu, that's true.
That's true true.
And then Parker's over here.
Parker, can you be a mouse for me?
Oh, you're such a mouse.
Let me see your tail.
Can I see your tail?
Oh, very cool.
- [Actor] Can I have ?? onstage?
(audience cheers)
- [Actor] Oh, yeah.
(cheerful music)
(audience screams)
- [Chris] Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
(audience screams)
Uh, I'm sorry to interrupt this,
this is really cute, you guys are nailing it,
but you're a nutcracker
and there's just one thing I have to do, doooo.
Do you have a candle?
Can you show me?
Ooh.
That's pretty.
Look at all those candles.
("Silent Night," by Joseph Mohr)
♫ Sleep in heavenly peace,
♫ Sleep in heavenly peace.
- [Chris] You guys are beautiful.
(audience screams)
Can we give it up for everyone onstage right now?
Thank you guys.
So in the show, I sing a Taylor Swift song,
which is not in my typical wheelhouse.
It's a little bit out of my comfort zone, right, Parker?
Wait, I need your help packing up.
What about your Pack and Play?
(laughs)
- Rah.
- [Chris] Be gentle, Parker.
Be gentle.
- Wah.
- Ready to go home? - Yeah.
- Hee hee hee.
- [Chris] How do you think the show went tonight?
- I think it was a mess, but it was fun.
But it was a mess.
- Do you think it's gonna get better,
or do you think it's just a mess?
- I think it's gonna get better,
I have an idea for the end for you.
- Okay.
- I'm going to sing backstage
and you're going to lip sync to me,
and I want you to have a very long, flowing cape
that someone can follow behind you and flapple it.
- Okay, that sounds good.
- I think that's a good idea.
- I feel like I need lion of some sort.
- Yeah, let's get you a lion.
- Good night. - [Chris] Good night.
- See you in a couple of days in San Jose.
- Yay, San Jose.
- Jose.
- It's time to go home.
You goin' home?
- I'm going home.
- You want to say hi to everybody?
Say hi.
(kids scream)
Say hi.
Hi, hi, hi, hi, hi.
We just got home and we're sitting by the fire.
That's the fire.
Jessica's wearing a tiara and two bows.
- Three bows. - Three bows,
so that she wouldn't forget them.
I am in my new sweater, because it's really cold
in our house
and we have takeout food that we're going to eat.
And it's really late at night
and I haven't started editing yet
and we have to drive to San Jose tomorrow.
Tired, guys.
And the worst part of it all,
the absolute worst part of it all,
is we haven't done advent calendar.
At all.
- I know, I was just thinking, how are we gonna do it
when we're in San Jose for like two or three days.
The kids are going to be so sad.
Jacob, the first thing he said
after the show - Do you think we should do
like, all those days tomorrow? - No.
After the show, Jacob got in the car,
and he's totally exhausted,
and the first thing he says is,
"Can we please do advent calendar when we get home?"
It's like, "We'll try."
And he was asleep within like two minutes.
- So we'll be doing two days
of advent calendar business tomorrow.
I know you guys like that a lot,
we love it too,
there's just some days we can't do it,
today was one of those days, unfortunately,
it was too crazy.
We got to Santa Barbara super early in the morning,
and just we were just on the go all day,
so tomorrow before we leave town, we'll do advent calendar
and this is the end of today,
but it's just the beginning for me,
'cause I have work to do.
- [Jessica] Do you want to say what we learned right now?
- No, I'll do it in a second,
'cause I don't know what we learned.
I don't really know what we learned until I edit the video
and see what we actually learned.
That's when I learn the lessons
that I then give to you.
- So people who don't edit their daily lives
don't learn anything in life.
- I wouldn't.
Hi, let's talk about what we learned today.
We learned that you can't put on a Santa suit
without adopting the Santa swagger.
We learned that when you're opening presents,
you should make sure your pizza is a safe distance away.
And finally we learned that life's lessons
are best learned through editing software.
Thanks for watching, everybody.
We'll see you next time.
(giggling)
- [Chris] So here's how it works.
The first person to get rid
of all their chips is the winner.
Uh, the way you get rid of your chips is you get--