>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY!
WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY, TO "THE LATE SHOW."
FOLKS, MY NEXT GUEST IS A TONY AND EMMY AWARD-WINNING ACTOR,
SINGER AND BROADWAY STAR TRIPLE THREAT.
PLEASE WELCOME KRISTIN CHENOWETH!
♪ ♪ ♪
>> HE'S THE BEST!
>> Stephen: YES.
THAT IS THE BEST BAND.
>> WHAT A GREAT AUDIENCE.
>> Stephen: ISN'T IT LOVELY TO BE IN FRONT OF A LIVE ODD
YENESS.
>> OH, IT'S LIKE WATER IN A DESERT.
>> Stephen: PEOPLE MAY NOT KNOW THIS, YOU AND I FIRST MET--
WE WERE BOTH IN THIS MOVIE CALLED-- "BEWITCHED" IN 2005.
I SPENT I THINK 52 DAYS, AND I APPEAR IN 45 SECONDS IN THIS
MOVIE.
BUT I JUST REMEMBER YOU WERE SO LOVELY TO HANG OUT WITH.
YOU WERE SUCH A LOVELY PRESENCE, AND SO NICE TO ME.
>> WELL, YOU DID YOU HAVE ANY LINES?
BECAUSE I DON'T THINK YOU DID.
LAUGH.
>> Stephen: I THINK I HAD TWO.
I THINK I HAD TWO LINES.
>> WHAT WERE THEY?
"YES?
NO?" >> Stephen: MAYBE-- I THINK I
SAY-- I I THINK I SAY TO THE SAMANTHA CHARACTER, I THINK I
SAY, "WE CHANGED YOUR LINE."
BECAUSE I PLAY ONE OF THE WRITERS ON THE TV SERIES
"BEWITCHED."
>> SO I HAVE A STORY, I DON'T KNOW IF YOU REMEMBER, BUT I WANT
TO TELL IT BECAUSE THIS IS THE MAN THAT HE IS.
ON THE SET, I'M A FAMOUS GUM CHEWER-- THIS IS EMBARRASSING--
I CHEW WITH MY MOUTH OPEN.
AND NORAH YELLS-- YOU KNOW, ," PLACES."
>> Stephen: THIS IS NORAH EPHRON.
>> "ROLLING."
>> I'M SMACKING AWAY.
AND HE GOES, "GUM."
AND I SAID, WHAT DID YOU DO?" AND HE SAID, "GIVE IT TO ME.
GIVE IT TO ME."
AND I WENT... AND HE TOOK IT.
>> Stephen: ANY TIME YOU NEED I'M THERE.
YOU CALL ME.
I'LL TAKE YOUR GUM.
>> IT WAS THE SWEETEST THING.
I'M NOT DONE.
THE ONLY AUDIENCE I'VE HAD IS MY DOG.
WHAT I WANT TO TELL YOU NEXT IS A FEW YEARS LATER WE'RE ON THE
RED CARPET AND YOU AND YOUR WIFE.
>> Stephen: EVIE.
>> I LIKE HER A LOT.
>> Stephen: I DO, TOO.
>> I'M LIKE, HI, Y'ALL, HI.
AND I'M PROBABLY GOING... AND HE GOES, "SO, I MIGHT BE GETTING MY
OWN SHOW."
AND I SAID, "OH, THAT'S SO SWEET.
GOOD LUCK."
HERE WE ARE.
I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU!
>> Stephen: THANK YOU VERY MUCH THANK YOU.
>> YOU DESERVE IT.
>> Stephen: THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
>> YOU DESERVE IT SCBLU CLEARLY >> Stephen: YOU CLEARLY LOVE
BEING IN FRONT OF AN AUDIENCE.
>> I HATE IT.
>> Stephen: YOU'RE A BROADWAY STARK YOU TOUR, YOU HAVE A
MASTERS IN OPERA PERFORMANCE.
WHAT WAS IT LIKE BEING AWAY FROM AN AUDIENCE FOR TWO YEARS?
WHAT WERE YOU DOING SINGING TO THE DOG?
>> I WAS SINGING TO MY DOG, THUNDER.
>> Stephen: THUNDER.
>> AFTER THE N.B.A.
KEVIN DURANT, I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY.
ANYWAY, I FOUND MYSELF USING CLOROX AND CLEANING AND DOING
HIGH NOTES, JUST LIKE CLEAN AND HIGH NOTE.
JUST CLEAN AND HIGH NOTE.
AND MY FIANCE WAS LIKE, "YOU SHOULD DO THIS ON TIKTOK.
AND I WAS LIKE, "WHAT IT TIKTOK?"
HE'S YOUNGER THAN ME.
ANYWAY, HE'S TAUGHT ME A LOT.
HE SAID, "LET'S DO THE HIGH NOTES."
SO I STARTED DOING -- >> Stephen: HOW HIGH ARE WE
TALKING HERE?
>> REALLY?
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
REALLY.
>> I THINK JON BATISTE DESERVES A HIGH NOTE.
GIVE ME A "D," A HIGH "D."
AAAAAAAH!
I THINK YOUR AUDIENCE DESERVES A HIGH "D."
THAT'S ONE UP FROM A HIGH "C"?
OOOOOOOHHH!
I THINK-- STEPHEN COLBERT DESERVES ONE HALF STEP UP.
GIVE ME THE E-PLUS.
OOOOOOOOH!
( APPLAUSE ).
>> Stephen:-- I-- FOR ONE, I'M GLAD I ALREADY HAD MY CHILDREN.
I THINK YOU JUST STERILIZED ME WITH THE POWER OF THAT NOTE.
WHEN IS IT APPROPRIATE-- WHEN IS IT APPROPRIATE TO POP OUT ONE
NOTE?
>> ALL THE TIME.
I FEEL AS IF IT'S ALL THE TIME.
>> Stephen: IT DOESN'T SCARE-- IT DOESN'T FRIGHTEN THE CHILDREN
IN THE NEIGHBORHOOD?
>> IT SCARES EVERYONE.
ONE TIME-- THEY SAY TRUE STORY AND I KNOW YOU KNOW ME.
BUT I WAS IN CVS WITH MY MASK ON, AND Y'ALL ARE ALL HERE WITH
YOUR MASKS ON.
THANK YOU.
BUT I COULD NOT BREATHE, AND I COULDN'T FIND MY ONE LASH TO
DRESS UP FOR MYSELF.
AND I THOUGHT, I DESERVE THE HIGH NOTE.
AND MY FIANCE IS LIKE, IN CVS, MUST YOU?
MUST YOU DO IT?" I HOPE HE SIGNS THE PREUP IN.
JOSH, I LOVE YOU.
( APPLAUSE ).
>> Stephen: YOU ORIGINATED-- YOU ORIGINATED, OF COURSE, AS
EVERYONE KNOWS, THE ROLE OF GLINDA IN "WICKED."
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
THEY'RE MAKE A MOVIE WITH ARIANA GRANDE PLAYING YOUR PART.
AND I UNDERSTAND YOU HAVE KNOWN ARIANA SINCE SHE WAS LITTLE.
>> 10 YEARS OLD.
SHE CAME TO SEE "WICKED" WITH HER GRANDMA.
AND SHE SAID, I WANT TO BE YOU."
AND I THOUGHT, AGAIN, LIE I DID WITH YOU, "THAT'S SO SWEET.
THAT'S SO SWEET."
AND NONA SAYS, "ARIANA SING FOR HER."
AND SHE DOESN'T REMEMBER THIS, BUT I REMEMBER IT, AND SHOO SANG
SOMETHING.
I GAVE HER HAND SOAP.
I GAVE HER A FAKE WAND.
AND HERE WE SIT, ALL THESE YEARS LATER, I'VE KNOWN FOR A WHILE,
AND I FEEL LIKE THE FULL CIRCLE MOMENT IS HAPPENING.
AND THE RIGHT PERSON IS GOING TO BE...
HANDING THE CROWN AND THE WAND, AND I'M SO HAPPY.
>> Stephen: HAVE YOU GIVEN HER ANY ADVICE?
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
ROLE, I SAID, "I KNOW EVERYTHING THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT GLINDA,
SO THERE'S NOTHING I CAN TELL YOU THAT YOU WON'T LEARN ON YOUR
OWN."
AND TWO DAYS AGO SHE TEXTED ME SOMETHING I WILL NOT SAY.
AND SHE SAID, "DID YOU KNOW THIS ABOUT GLINDA?"
AND I SAID, "NO!" SO THE TEACHER BECOMING THE
STUDENT AGAIN.
>> Stephen: THAT'S LOVELY.
>> AND I LOVE THAT.
I LOVE IT.
>> Stephen: THIS IS ANOTHER LOVELY THING.
YOU HAVE NOW WRITTEN A NEW CHILDREN'S BOOK.
IT'S CALLED "WHAT WILL I DO WITH MY LOVE TODAY?" WHAT'S IT ABOUT?
>> IT'S ABOUT ME AND THUNDER PUP IN NEW YORK.
I WAS MUCH YOUNGER, SAME HEIGHT.
>> Stephen: YOU WERE MUCH YOUNGER WHEN YOU WERE A CHILD.
>> EXACTLY.
BUT I WAS-- I'M AN ADOPTED PERSON.
AND I RESCUED BY DOG, THUNDER.
SO IT'S ABOUT HOW WE RESCUE EACH OTHER.
AND THAT WE MIGHT NOT ALL LOOK THE SAME FAMILIES, AND TALK THE
SAME-- MY PARENTS ARE ENGINEERS AND SHOULDN'T EVER SING, EVER,
SHOULD THEY EVER SING, AND I DON'T DO MATH.
BUT THE BOOK IS ABOUT FAMILY AND LOVE AND THE MORE LOVE YOU PUT
OUT, THE MORE YOU GET BACK.
>> Stephen: A LESSON WE COULD ALL TAKE TO HEART.
ESPECIALLY NOW.
>> Stephen: KRISTIN, SO LOVELY TO SIGH.
THANK YOU FOR THE HIGH NOTES.
>> ALWAYS.
>> Stephen: HER CHILDREN'S BOOK, "WHAT WILL I DO WITH MY LOVE
TODAY?" IS AVAILABLE NOW.
KRISTIN CHENOWETH, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.