B: Hello everyone welcome to another episode of Million Dollars, But. I'm Barbara Dunkleman and today-
B: I'm joined by the lovely Elyse Willems, and also the lovely first-time million dollars butter Mariel Salcedo!
M: What's up everyone? B: I'm so happy you're here.
M: Thank you so much, i'm so happy to be- E: May I just say Mary, you are killing it thus far.
B: Hey, speaking of killing it Today's theme is gonna be death.
(E: *Dun dun dun sound effect) B: Because Mariel, as we know, is terrified of death, so let's celebrate.
M: Why not. Cheers to that. Death.
E: To death .
M: So million dollars, but it's a lot of money. Yep. You have to be the grim reaper for an entire year
B: What does the Grim Reaper do?
M: you are following people around you are carding people to the afterlife. B: so is there just one costume?
E: That's gonna be a fashion nightmare. You should wear that same cloak for an entire year
E: Staying it really gross you go to the beach. You got to be in that cloak
M: Would you be dazzle your outfits, I think I would be dazzle that like Sythe thing
B: What do they use it for? E: I guess you use it for slaying people?
But if you want to use it like as a grabbing tool
You know if you can't reach into the cover, and there's a like bag of cookies up there. You know such psychic to you oh
Oh Man, there's like there's the whole moral conundrum of killing people and what if they're people that you like
But what if Gus is eating too many Pizza poppers?
What if he chokes on one day and you show up guesses like help me help me like I will
Put you out of your misery if you're the Grim Reaper. Can you decide not to kill someone?
You could oh, I would just sit on my couch eating Cheetos, and there's just like death and destruction
But people are so yeah people are getting shot in the street and surviving. It's a miracle
What if they know it's you people start being really nice to you send gift baskets and stuff
Oh, yeah, you become like an idol you're on all the postage stamps
You're on billboards everywhere, and then you'd pursue your rapping career, so it could be the grim rapper oh
Damn I would absolutely take this one for the year
I would meet new people I have something new to put on my resume well reap the benefits of this one
M: well im outta here. (laughter)
All right ladies million dollars, but you see dead people
superhero
They are technically so they could go through doors. They could go through walls whatever
Okay, well what if they're?
Living with you or what if they're in your house your house is haunted. Yeah early shitty roommate
Do they wash dishes here shitty ghost roommate they've just given up. I mean they're dead they don't have to prove anything
There's gonna be people fucking everywhere constantly want me to talk to you because you're the only one who could see them
That's true. Oh, yeah, dance close with me super pet dere already but poppin all the time
Yeah, you would never have to worry about not finding someone to dance with except you ever only to see you dancing about yourself
Why not? I just had a great idea though
You invite people to your house on Halloween or actually scares start happening could you be the the best house on the block?
Every year, yeah
Okay, okay. I'm having sex. I mean anytime you're intimate you're gonna have an audience. There's no privacy
What if it's like a really hot dude?
And then you guys let me ghost sex
Imagine the times that you can have together with you me like your hop ghost boyfriend
And you've got your hot mangos - jeez helping me mold the clay. What did he go? See you oh? I have words
Alright, so big question: million dollars, but now you have the sixth sense and you see dead people. Would you take it?
I think I would I don't know that I could realistically live feeling like somebody's around me all the time yeah
I'm too much of an introvert to deal with it. I think would go a little crazy
So a million dollars, but your friend dies
But they get like taxidermied and then they live with you on your couch à la weekend at Bernie's
Oh god, or like they just got into the dating scene so you're like you're their wingman. Yeah, if they're on a date
You've got to like be there too, but somehow secretly so their date doesn't realise. What do you think the other person's thinking goes?
They're like, 'Oh this person is just like really common stoic' like yeah
I like I like a good listener so like if you're at the movies, and you're behind them
Kind of like throwing popcorn in their face
Yeah, would you have to hide this from people like you're trying to make the facade of them not being dead, right?
Yeah, that's how I picture it
I think it could be fun if
It's a friend that you don't really get to hang out with a lot like a Gus now
They can do anything with you. People are like 'Did you see like Gus is really warming up to Barbara all of a sudden'
'Yeah, like they're canoeing together, they're going up on like milkshake dates together. They're sharing that milkshake' Yeah, he's my best friend now
What do you guys think to keep your friends legacy going or do you check them to the curb
I don't think... I have friends that just do too much shit
I don't think I could handle this.
And I also want to live my own life
I don't have to be responsible for someone else's dead body.
I'll tell Gus how you guys really feel
Please do
Thank you so much for joining us on this episode of million dollars, but ladies. Thank you so much for joining me
This is the end of the episode good because it was about death hey guys
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