Hello I'm German and I bet you this controller that you've watched at least 1 episode of The Simpsons.
"Kinds of Drunks"
In the circle..
of life.
Okay.
Alcohol.
Alcohol was created for one goal.
Get you drunk.
And there are many kinds of drunks.
"Vomiting Drunk"
It's the one that can't control his stomach.
And they are one of the most dangerous.
Because you don't know where,
how
or when he's going to shoot.
Yeah Fernanda spends too much time with that 2m tall guy,
but I trust her.
But you know that she stays at his place,
that she comes back with hickeys really doesn't-
"Violent Drunk"
This one's the most annoying.
Anything you say, they'll turn into a fight.
The weirdest thing is that they know who to fight with.
They don't fight with the 2m. tall husky guy.
They always fight with the skinny, short guy that wears eyeglasses.
They're drunk, but they aren't stupid.
*drunk talking*
What?!,
are you looking at me?!,
do you like me by any chance?!,
wanna fight?, wanna fight?.
I'm gonna break your fucking face!,
so what?, I'm a black belt!
Let's go outside!, let's go!.
But answer me! answer!.
"Stubborn Drunk"
This kinda drunk thinks they know everything.
If something goes through their mind,
there's nobody who can change their mind.
I you say the sky is blue,
they say it's red.
If you say "Let's go over there",
they go over there.
No one can stand them.
German you're too drunk to drive.
I'm not drunk!.
German, you're gonna kill yourself.
I'm alright!.
Give me the keys.
Give them to me.
Ok, do whatever you want, kill yourself or whatever.
I'm fine.. I'm..
I'm fine.. so exaggerated.
I'm not drunk.
"Weak Bladder Drunk"
Like the name says.
Drunk with no ability to retain liquids.
Or better known as
D.W.N.A.T.R.L.
The problem with D.W.N.A.T.R.L.
is that you can't maintain a conversation with them.
Because every 10 seconds they're like:
"I gotta go to the bathroom."
And that's how I got Herpes.
Cool,
wait just a second I gotta go to the bathroom.
Oh, ok.
Ok, ok, ok, I'm ready.
Ok like I was saying, it started going on like a month ago more or less..
Oh, I gotta go again.
Ok.
Wait.. just wait.
Ok, now finally..
No, no, no, there's still a little bit left, just a bit.
Again?!.
Ok.
Oh my god!.
What?.
"Dealer Drunk"
They do anything to get liquor.
Even without any money.
They're so desperate,
That they're capable of selling their mother to get some alcohol.
May I get 6 beers please?.
Ok, it's 15 dollars.
It's just that I don't have any money.
Then I can't sell you anything.
What if we trade?.
How many beers will you give me for..
This balloon.
None.
What about.. an empty bottle.
No.
A glass.
No.
A spoon.
No.
A dog.
No.
Another spoon.
No.
A hug.
No.
Pika Pika!.
No.
My virginity?.
Okay!.
"Inexpensive Drunk"
They're your best friends.
If you invite them to have a drink,
It's very cheap.
They're ok with 1 beer.
Literally.
They get drunk with just the smell of beer.
-Hey, do you want a beer?.-Ok thanks.
"Gentleman Drunk"
This one's funny.
With alcohol he can turn from the shiest guy in the world
to a Mexican soap opera gentleman.
And there's something worse.
You already know how alcohol works.
It makes all men look tall and husky.
And it makes all women look like Megan Fox.
And this Mexican soap opera gentleman,
falls in this.
He can't distinguish between an attractive woman and..
a rock.
Oh, what a beautiful woman.
German, wait a second.
Leave me, that kitten will be mine.
German, no, because it's not what it looks like.
You better take notes, this is how you captivate a woman.
But, German!
Hello beautiful,
I can see you're turned on.
"Gullible Drunk"
This drunk still lives in a crazy world of animated fantasies.
They're convinced that sponges really do live in a pineapple under the sea,
and that snails say "Meow".
They even believe their own lies.
They're the ones that say:
I won't drink ever again.
My head,
I drank too much last night,
ok now I promise I'll never drink again,
I promise for my wife, my children, my dog,
I won't ever drink even 1 drop of alcohol.
Next Day.
Hooray alcohol!.
Question!.
This one's for the people who have been following me for a long time.
What's the name of my video where for the first time the "Happy couple hitting iron stick" is on.
I wanna see how good your memory is.
Anyway.
This was this week's video, if you liked it please click Thumbs up, down here.
If it's the first time you watch one of my videos, if you liked it, subscribe, I upload videos every friday!.
Also don't forget to follow me on my addictive and sensual Facebook.
And on my heavenly Twitter.
A psychological hug and see you next friday.
And remember, not everything that shines is gold,
sometimes it can be a diamond!.
Bye bye!.