hey everybody today we are covering partner tips for labor and this particular video is going to
focus on tips that are especially helpful during the time of the corona virus pandemic so we've
got three tips today really speaking to partners and how they can best step up and be great support
people during this time so if you're watching this and you are the pregnant person and your
partner's not with you make sure that they watch it later or you pause and get them to
watch it with you now if we have a met in real life my name is Alice Turner I'm a doula and a
childbirth educator and on my channel you're going to find videos about childbirth so if that's your
thing then make sure that you subscribe and hit that notification bell so you'll know next time
a video is out today we have three great tips for partners and each of them starts with M the
letter M so we've got a 3m that our partner tips that we are going to jump into and the first one
is especially important when it comes to giving birth during the corona virus pandemic and that
has to do with masks it is quite likely that if you are giving birth at a hospital during the
height of the köppen 19 pandemic that you will be asked to wear a mask both the laboring person and
the support person so if you are required to wear a mask there are a few things I want to let you
know to think about partners some tips to making most of this experience with masks first of all as
you'll see it is a little more difficult to hear me with the mask on right it is buffered it's a
little bit it's a little bit hard to hear and so do not be afraid when you're working with your
healthcare team they will definitely have masks on during this time to ask for things repeated
now I have had to do this myself when I have supported people during a cesarean birth and
speaking with care providers that have masks on so I'm really aware that sometimes it is hard to
understand and partners this is easier job for you to do than your partner that's in labor they are
not going to really have the energy to keep asking for things repeated or asking for things louder so
be aware of that also having that mask on really puts a bit of a barrier between you and the person
you're supporting so as you can tell you can't you might be able to tell from my eyes that I'm
smiling with the mask on but not necessarily and so what I suggest is that you work as a team to
figure out some form of communication that is a positive communication so that when you're wearing
your mask you can show each other a smile or a positive reaction right so instead of having the
mask like this you can do maybe a thumbs up maybe a double thumbs up any variation to show that
you're smiling underneath your mask support person it's so important to show these emotions and we
have to figure out a way even if we're gonna wear masks so make sure that you practice that together
and have a form of communication with that mask that's gonna feel good and supportive finally
being that the mask is a barrier between you make sure that you're physically close when you're
supporting someone so even your you pull a chair up to the bed if they're in the bed where they're
standing stand close by you can always put a hand on a touch touch on the arm holding hands touch
on the shoulder touch on the leg just letting your hand rest on their leg that physical closeness can
show support almost as well as a smile on your face and so make sure that that mask does not
make you feel further disconnected from each other but that you really and add some other connection
points the second M of our partner tips is called mirroring so mirroring is where you are like the
mirror to your partner in labor and what you want to do is do exactly what you are suggesting that
they do so for example if you see tension in their shoulders you might do with your shoulders like
this and just show that you should shake it out if you want to show a deep breath if you have
a mask on like we talked about earlier you might do it with hand signals like so you are mirroring
what you want them to do if you want to shake it out if you want to put your arms up and palms
and rest them nice and loose you can do that if you're not wearing a mask and you want to display
an open mouth jaw you can do that if you're doing a position and you're suggesting say leaning then
you can do it too and show exactly what to do so by you doing what you're suggesting it's a
lot easier for the person in labor to follow and it's a lot of nonverbal communication with which
works really well in labor too so the third M is going to be for management there is a lot going on
things are changing rapidly and as you prepare for birth and throw in a pandemic and it just
really boosts up those questions that you have for your provider questions about what's going
on and just a unknowingness and what can help if partners you can be the managers you can manage
the data in this relationship so what I mean by that is as questions come up as discussions come
up as you're preparing for this big day make sure that you have a blog that you can do questions
whether that's just a notebook it's in your phone somewhere that you're keeping track of all the
questions that you need to ask your providers next time you see them either in person or virtually so
this is a great thing for partners to do because you can take ownership of this task and it will
take a big burden off your partner who is doing a lot as in a physical way preparing for this birth
and growing the baby and taking care of their own body so if you can be the manager of data
and that also includes things like any resources that you might need the name of your pediatrician
the phone number how to get in touch with them all the phone numbers that you need whether you have a
doula whether you have a childbirth educator you can contact keeping track of all that information
and real organized way and letting your partner know that you are the manager of it really helps
that's you know reduce that stress now when you go to your appointment with your provider it is
likely that partners are not going to be allowed to come along with but that shouldn't mean that
they shouldn't actually come with you virtually on your phone so I really recommend that people
say to their provider hey I've got my partner on the phone here so that they can hear everything
and help me remember my questions and partners you can interact either on FaceTime or just with audio
and really listen in you can take notes if you're at home while your partner is at the doctor and
really support them that way and make sure that they are getting all their questions answered
that you know if you hear something and you're out of doctors office you might forget what they
say and then if there's two of you especially someone at home taking notes you're gonna be
better off knowing what was what you talked about and make sure that all your questions
are answered the other thing is if you are seeing your care providers virtually on video make sure
that you have your partner there for that so it's just another time to have another person there to
manage that data about health care there could be a time that partners are going to need to
know more information especially about if you did are discharged from the hospital specially if you
leave the hospital earlier than planned partners are really going to need to know things to look
for for postpartum care how to help take care of their partner and how to take care of the baby
and so they need to be really all-in be those data managers and be ready to go so those are our three
ends for partner tips especially when birthing during the corona virus pandemic as a reminder
we've got tips for making the most of wearing masks during labor how to use the mirroring
technique and how to be the managers of all of the data around birth and labor and postpartum make
sure you are subscribed to the channel because next week we're going to do tips for the laboring
person in the time of a pandemic okay guys thanks for joining me today hope you enjoyed it