SOME OF YOU MAY HAVE BEEN WONDERING WHERE I HAVE BEEN THESE PAST FEW MONTHS...
IT ALL BEGAN WHEN I WENT TO NIA-GARA FALLS TO RECORD THE SOOTHING SOUNDS OF MILLIONS
OF GALLONS OF WATER FOR MY LATEST MIXTAPE FRANKJAVCEE VOL 2.2 NOW AVAILABLE ON SPOTIFY
APPLE MUSIC AND BANDCAMP...
LUCKY BJORK WAS THERE ON VACATION AND INVITED ME TO ICELANDE WHERE SHE TAUGHT ME ANCIENT
SECRET VOCAL TECHNIQUES WHICH I CAN'T TELL OR SHOW ANYONE EVER, HOWEVER THE ONLY WAY
TO UNLOCK THE TECHNIQUE WAS IF I VISITED A SHAMAN DEEP IN THE AMAZON RAINFOREST...
THERE I MET A TOUCAN BY THE NAME OF SAM, WHO CALLED ME WALAKUTIKI WHICH MEANS, SUPER AWESOME
COOL GUY IN THE ANCIENT TOUCAN LANGUAGE...
ODDLY ENOUGH THE TOUCAN ENDED UP BEING THE SHAMAN AS MOST OF YOU MAY NOT KNOW, ALL SHAMANS
ARE MASSIVE FURRIES, BUT NOT ALL FURRIES ARE SHAMANS, SO ANYWAYS THE SHAMAN GAVE ME A BLUNT
LACED WITH DMT FROM SOME INUYASHA BRANCH OR SOMETHING AND SAW A BUNCH OF GEOMETRIC PATTERNS
THAT WENT ON FOREVER BUT WAS KINDA AWARE IT WAS MY BRAIN GOING CRAZY KINDA LIKE GOING
TO DISNEYLAND ON SHROOMS...
AFTER A WHILE OF COMPARING MY DEEPLY SPIRITUAL QUEST TO MIDDLE AMERICAN CONSUMERISM I STARTED
FREAKING OUT CUZ MY OWN EGO WAS ITS VERY BEST TO CLING ON TO MY BEING WHILE THE VOID AND
EVERYTHING LOOKED LIKE ONE OF THOSE RENAISSANCE HELL PAINTINGS. ONLY THROUGH A NUERNAL NETWORK
FILTER WHERE EVERYTHING LOOKS LIKE DOGS.
THATS WHEN MY BRAIN PROCESSOR GOT FRIED TURNED OFF
I FOUND MYSELF IN A WINDOWS 98 SCREENSAVER MAZE WHERE A I MET A RAT NAMED TIM WHO REALLY
LIKED CHEESE... HE TOLD ME WHILE IN THE SCREENSAVER TO TURN OFF AND TUNE IN, AND EAT A BUNCH OF
CHEESE.
I COMPLIED AND ATE THE SACRED CHEESE....
WHEN I AWOKE I WAS AT THE DJ BOOTH AT AN EDM FESTIVAL IN SOUTH AMERICA STILL HIGH OFF THE
INUYAHSA I RAMBLED ON THE MIC FOR A COUPLE MINUTES ABOUT HOW MUSIC AND DRUGS WHERE THE
SAME THING TIL I GOT KICKED OFF THE STAGE.
THERE I KEPT WALKING SOUTH THROUGH A GREAT PLAIN... WHEN NIGHT FELL I COULD FINALLY SEE
THE STARS HAVING BEEN RAISED AS AN INNER CITY YOUTH DRINKING TAP WATER I NEVER REALIZED
HOW BEAUTIFUL THE NIGHT SKY REALLY WAS.
WHEN I WOKE UP I MET A LLAMA WHO SMOKED MARIJUANA NAMED OBAMA WHO WAS A MESSY BITCH WHO LIVED
FOR DRAMA... WE WERE ALSO IN MACHU PICHU WHICH WAS REALLY NEAT. OBAMA TOLD ME TO HEAD SOUTH
AND I WOULD FIND WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR, SO SINCE I WAS SUPER STONED I THOUGHT IT WAS
A GOOD IDEA...
IT GOT COLD REALLY FAST AND BEFORE I KNEW IT I WAS STARING DOWN A GIANT 9 FOOT TALL
PENGUIN WHO SPOKE TO ME USING ITS EYES AND WE UNDERSTOOD EACH OTHER... IN ORDER TO GET
PENGUIN RESPECT I HAD TO JUMP INTO THE FREEZING OCEAN AND EAT A FISH... I FOUND A FISH BUT
IT WAS TOO FAST FOR ME AND I GOT CAUGHT IN THE EQUATORIAL OCEAN CURRENT AND ENDED UP
IN WARMER TROPICAL WATERS WHERE I SAW A BUNCH OF BEAUTIFUL SEA LIFE AND BUNCH OF LITERALLY
GARBAGE JUST FLOATING IN THE OCEAN.
I WAS WASHED ASHORE ON A STRANGE ISLAND SOMEWHERE IN THE PACIFIC I THINK IT WAS JAPAN, BUT EVERYONE
WAS SO BLURRY I COULDN'T REALLY TELL... I DECIDED TO TAKE A PLANE BACK HOME, BUT WITH
WHAT LITTLE MONEY I HAD THE PLANE ONLY MADE ITS WAY TO EGYPT WHERE I CLIMBED ON TOP OF
THE PYRAMIDS DURING A SOLAR ECLIPSE AND THE ALIGNMENT OF THE PLANETS WHICH OPENED UP A
VORTEX THAT TELEPORTED ME INTO OUTERSPACE WHERE I EXPLODED BECOMING ONE WITH THE UNIVERSE
AND BEING A INFINITE BEING OF LIGHT AND ENERGY.
AND THATS WHY I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO MAKE VIDEOS IN THE PAST FEW MONTHS.