♪ YOU'RE MY VERY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD ♪
♪ LIL' BUDDY, OOH, LIL' BUDDY ♪
♪ YOU'RE BETTER THAN THE OTHER BOYS AND GIRLS ♪
♪ AND SOON, THE WORLD WILL COME TO SEE ♪
♪ THAT YOU'RE THE BEST FRIEND THERE COULD EVER BE ♪
♪ LIL' BUDDY, OOH, LIL' BUDDY ♪
♪ YOU'RE THE BEST LIL' BUDDY FOR ME ♪
Announcer:
WASN'T THAT SO SWEET?
ALSO...HERE'S
[
MMM-MMM-MMM-MMM!
O...KAY.
[ UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS ]
♪ I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU SAY! ♪
♪ I'M GONNA DO WHAT I WANT ALL DAY! ♪
♪ I'M THE KING OF THE WORLD! I'M THE KING OF THE WORLD! ♪
[ WHIPPING ]
[ KIDS SHOUTING PLAYFULLY ]
[ KIDS LAUGH ]
LIKE, WE WENT TO THE MALL --
HEY. DID YOU GUYS MEET MY LITTLE BUDDY YET?
HIS NAME IS LIL' BUDDY.
DO YOU WANT TO PET HIS HAIR?
THAT'S...OKAY.
OKAY, BUT IT'S REALLY SOFT.
UH, WE GOT TO GO...
SWING.
[ GRUNTING ]
HEY, SUMO.
AAH!
FEEL MY BABY. HE'S KICKING IN MY TUMMY.
COME ON, SUMO.
LOOK. DANCE WITH HIM. LOOK. DANCE WITH LIL' BUDDY.
COME ON.
[ SMOOCHES ]
UH...
CLARENCE, I'M DOING SOMETHING.
[ GRUNTING ]
REED! REED, REED, REED, REED, REED.
REED. LOOK. HOLD MY LIL' BUDDY'S HAND WITH ME.
[ GROANS ]
HOLD HIS HAND. COME ON. LOOK.
WE'RE MARRIED.
EH, NO. EH, NO.
[ GRUNTS ]
[ CRYING ]
[ GASPS ] IT'S OKAY.
Shh! IT'S OKAY, IT'S OKAY, IT'S OKAY.
I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY.
"SORRY" DOESN'T CUT IT.
I'M GIVING YOU TIME-OUT -- FOR FIVE MINUTES.
BUT I DIDN'T --
TALKING GETS YOU FIVE MORE.
JIMOTHY! [ BLOWS WHISTLE ]
GET THAT OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!
NO TALKING.
[ KIDS SHOUTING PLAYFULLY ]
[ TICKING ECHOES ]
UH...
[ TICKING CONTINUES ]
[ TICKING QUICKENS ]
[ Thinking ]
IT
[ TICKING CONTINUES ]
BUT IF I SAY SOMETHING, I'LL GET FIVE
CLARENCE!
AAH!
YOUR FIVE MINUTES WAS UP FIVE MINUTES AGO!
WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SOMETHING?
HURRY UP AND GO PLAY BEFORE THE BELL RINGS.
[ BELL RINGS ]
[ KIDS CHEERING ]
OH. UH...HMM.
WELL, THAT'S THE WAY THE COOKIE CRUMBLES.
NOW GET BACK TO CLASS!
OKAY, TEST YOUR GOOP, HUH?
SEE IF YOU CAN ROLL IT IN A BALL, SLAP IT.
DON'T BE AFRAID TO GET MESSY. LOOK...
BELSON, CAN I SEE IT? I JUST -- I JUST WANT TO EAT IT.
[ LAUGHS ]
WRITE DOWN "SQUISHY."
[ LAUGHS ] "SQUISHY."
WRITE DOWN, UH...
HEY, AIN'T YOU GONNA PLAY WITH IT?
HEY, CLARENCE.
ARE -- ARE YOU OKAY?
IS THIS ABOUT MISSING RECESS?
IT'S OKAY, MAN.
HA. UH, L-LOOK, WHO CARES?
I DON'T CARE ABOUT
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ Mockingly ] "WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SOMETHING?"
[ GROWLS ]
UM, HOW 'BOUT BECAUSE I WASN'T ALLOWED TO?
RAAAAAH!
I JUST -- I JUST WANTED PEOPLE TO PLAY WITH...
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
...YOOOOOOOOOU.
[ Straining ] SORRY, BUDDY. THIS IS HOW THE COOKIE CRUMBLES.
[ GASPS ]
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ GRUNTING ]
THANKS FOR ALL YOUR HELP, BRENDA.
CLARENCE?
[ PANTING ]
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ GRUNTING ]
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ PANTING ]
[ THUNDER CRASHES ]
[ GRUNTING ]
UUAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!
HEY, CLARENCE.
HEY, UH, WHAT DID THE FISHERMAN SAY TO THE MAGICIAN?
"PICK A COD -- ANY COD." [card]
[ LAUGHS ]
"PICK A COD." C-O-D -- LIKE THE FISH, YOU KNOW?
LIKE THE FISH.
[ LAUGHS, SNORTS ]
[ CLEARS THROAT ]
[ VACUUM CLEANER WHIRRING ]
♪ I USED TO BE THE KING OF THE CLASSROOM ♪
♪ NOW I'M JUST A FOOL ♪
♪ I USED TO BE RESPECTED ♪
♪ NOW I'M THE REJECT OF THE SCHOOL ♪
♪ I USED TO RUN THIS RABBLE ♪
♪ NOW THEY ALL RUN AROUND ME ♪
♪ I USED TO BE THE PRESIDENT OF THE PLAYGROUND ♪
♪ NOW I'M DOING LOUSY ♪
♪ LIFE HAS LOST ITS COLOR, DARKNESS SURROUNDS ME ♪
♪ LIL' BUDDY, I MISS MY LIL' BUDDY ♪
♪ FEEL LIKE I'VE LOST A BROTHER ♪
♪ AND NOBODY'S FOUND ME ANOTHER THAT LOVES ME ♪
♪
♪ NOW EVERYTHING SEEMS SO UGLY ♪
♪ SO UGLY ♪
♪ I'M FEELING CRUDDY, I MISS MY LITTLE BUDDY NOW ♪
♪ WEIRD STUFF IS GOING ON ♪
♪ I SAID WEIRD STUFF IS GOING ON AROUND ME ♪
♪ I SAID WEIRD STUFF IS GOING ON ♪
♪ I DON'T EVEN RECOGNIZE MYSELF ♪
Psst! HEY. Psst!
HEY, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU?
YOU GOT, LIKE, COOL. HEY, I MEAN IT.
YOU'RE LIKE THE NEW TOUGH GUY IN SCHOOL
WHO'S, LIKE, TOTALLY DEAD INSIDE.
UNH-UNH. I HEARD THAT.
AND NEITHER OF YOU ARE COOL.
ACTING UP IS NOT THE "COOL GUY" THING TO DO.
THOSE MATHLETE KIDS -- NOW,
[ SCOFFS ]
IT'S CALLED RESPECT. IT'S CALLED DISCIPLINE.
HMPH.
[ CHUCKLES ]
SERIOUSLY, WHEN YOU DID THAT THING WITH THAT --
THAT WAS TOP-NOTCH.
HEY, HOW'D YOU LIKE TO TEAM UP, HUH?
[ MUSIC PLAYS ON EARBUDS ]
OH, I GOT IT. SILENT TREATMENT, HUH?
GOT TO EARN HIS RESPECT FIRST.
CLASSIC, BRO.
DON'T GO TOO WILD!
UNH-UNH-UNH-UNH-UNH! NOT TOO FAST!
MISS SHOOP! MISS SHOOP!
REMEMBER THAT ONE KID,
THE WEIRD ONE WHO USED TO BE NICE, BUT THEN HE'S WEIRD NOW?
THE ONE WITH THAT -- WHO CUT HIS HAIR?
THERE'S ACTUALLY -- HE'S TRYING TO --
THERE'S A BUNCH OF KIDS, AND I THINK YOU SHOULD --
UH, JUST COME AND SEE!
Clarence: COME ON, JEFF. H-HOLD MY LITTLE BUDDY'S HAND.
N-N-N-NO! CLARENCE, STOP! NO, STOP!
HOLD LIL' BUDDY'S HAND. IT'S MY LITTLE HAND.
GET THAT AWAY FROM ME!
COME ON. GRAB IT.
IT'S NICE AND WARM.
NO! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! NO!!
WHAT THE -- WHAT THE HECK IS THIS?
YOU!
YOU BLOW THAT WHISTLE,
AND YOU'RE MAKING A BIG MISTAKE.
GAH!
[ GROWLS ]
[ EAGLE CRIES ]
DON'T YOU E--
WHASSUUUP?!
[ LAUGHTER ]
GUESS YOU SAVED THE LAST PANTS FOR -- [dance]
[ GRUNTS ]
[ KIDS GASP ]
WHOO-HOO!
[ GROANS ]
DON'T CONDONE VIOLENCE!
I HEARD HE'S GONNA GET EXPELLED.
I HEARD THEY'RE PUTTING HIM IN A STOCK PILLORY
WHERE EVERYONE WILL THROW TOMATOES AT HIM.
I HEARD MRS. BAKER HAS A SPECIAL PUNISHMENT.
I HEARD --
SHOO, SHOO! GO BACK TO CLASS!
YOUR SPECIAL PUNISHMENT IS READY.
HI, CLARENCE.
MS. BAKER?
OH. R-- UH, THE PRINCIPAL HAS GONE TO AN, UH,
ALL-PRINCIPALS CONFERENCE... EH, THING.
SO I'M JUST KEEPING HIS SEAT WARM [LAUGHS] YOU KNOW?
KEEPING IT WARM. [ CLEARS THROAT ]
I'VE NOTICED YOU'VE BEEN HAVING A TOUGH TIME LATELY.
I D-- I DON'T KNOW.
YEAH, WELL, YOU'VE BEEN GETTING IN A LOT OF DETENTIONS
AND, YOU KNOW, BEHAVIORAL ISSUES.
'KAY.
WELL... [ INHALES DEEPLY ]
I'M SURE YOU'VE HEARD BY NOW
WE'VE COME UP WITH A SPECIAL PUNISHMENT FOR YOU.
[ DRAWER OPENS ]
BUT FIRST,
SOMEONE HERE WANTS TO SEE YOU.
[ Voice breaking ] LI-LI-LI-- [GASPS]
LITTLE BUDDY.
[ SOBBING ]
DADDY MISSES YOU SO MUCH.
[ SOBBING ]
LIL'-LIL'-BOOP BOOP.
WE KNOW HOW UPSET YOU WERE WHEN YOU MISSED RECESS.
THAT WASN'T FAIR, WAS IT?
NO.
WELL, WE THINK YOU SHOULD GET THAT TIME BACK.
HOW WOULD YOU LIKE YOUR VERY OWN RECESS --
SOME COOL-OFF TIME JUST FOR YOU AND LIL' BUDDY HERE?
REALLY?
MM-HMM. YEAH. GO AHEAD.
[ SIGHS ]
[ GRUNTS ]
[ GIGGLES ]
OH, CLARENCE.
DON'T FORGET WHAT HAPPENED
TO THE MAN WHO SUDDENLY GOT EVERYTHING HE WANTED.
WHAT HAPPENED?
HE LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.
[ GIGGLES ]
♪ LIL' BUDDY, OOH, LIL' BUDDY ♪
♪ YOU'RE MY VERY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD ♪
♪ LIL' BUDDY, OOH, LIL' BUDDY ♪
♪ YOU'RE BETTER THAN THE OTHER BOYS AND GIRLS ♪
♪ AND SOON, THE WORLD WILL COME TO SEE ♪
♪ THAT YOU'RE THE BEST FRIEND THERE COULD EVER BE ♪
♪ LIL' BUDDY, OOH, LIL' BUDDY ♪
[ LAUGHS ]
♪ YOU'RE THE BEST LIL' BUDDY FOR ME ♪
THIS IS A PUNISHMENT, MISTER!
A PUNISHMENT!
LOOKS LIKE WE GOT OUR OLD CLARENCE BACK.
HUH. DOES THAT MEAN WE CAN ALL BE FRIENDS AGAIN?
YEAH, PWOBABLY.
♪
♪ EARLY TO RISE ♪
♪ PICKING MY NOSE ♪