Fox News has reportedly been gripped by paranoia and fear
as on-air personalities worry they could be next to go
after last week's surprise ouster of Tucker Carlson.
Meanwhile, President Biden joked about a possible rematch
with Donald Trump in 2024
as Trump's likely main rival for the GOP nomination,
Ron DeSantis, loses steam.
For more on this, it's time for "A Closer Look."
[ Cheers and applause ]
The conservative movement
is in a state of panic and disarray right now
after a string of electoral and legal defeats.
Their front-runner for the nomination
is currently under indictment and facing more investigations.
They keep losing big races in key swing states,
from the 2022 Senate races
to the Wisconsin Supreme Court election in April.
And now their leading propaganda network
has been forced to pay out a massive defamation settlement
and cut ties with their top-rated host,
Tucker Carlson, seen here recording a hostage video
from the inside of a Bass Pro Shop.
And that sense of panic and fear
has apparently set in at Fox News itself.
"Rolling Stone" reported the...
Oh, my God, fake names is so much fun.
"Oh, sorry. Got to take this.
It's my Aunt Joan, as you can all see from the caller ID.
Hi, Joan. What's that?
You need to have a tooth extracted?
Oh, my God, that's terrible.
You know what else is terrible and about to get extracted?
Tucker Carlson. Okay. Got to go. I love you, Joan.
And just like this and every conversation,
this is off the record."
[ Laughter ]
Of course, knowing their hosts,
I'm guessing some of their names are much dumber.
Like, Brian Kilmeade definitely has a reporter
listed in his phone as Santa Claus,
although that definitely will backfire on him.
When that person calls,
he's gonna think it's actually Santa Claus.
"Oh, my God, good. You got my letter. Okay.
I want to change the PlayStation to an Xbox.
And also, I'm not into Funko Pops anymore."
The sense of panic at Fox is apparently so intense
that other hosts who pushed the big lie about the 2020 election
are worried they could also get fired.
Oh, my God, it's like a horror movie,
except in this movie,
the ax murderer is a 92-year-old Australian man,
and instead of chasing his victims,
he just makes them come to him.
"Pick up some speed and run to this chainsaw, you [bleep]"
[ Laughter ]
Also, we'll know when Jeanine Pirro gets fired
because it'll get so quiet.
[ Laughter ]
We're right across the street from the Fox News headquarters,
and we can hear her screaming whenever she's on the air.
Here, I'll show you. Open the window.
-You presented him with your fake dossier
alleging the president had prostitutes
peeing on him in Moscow.
And it's possible... -Close it.
[ Laughter ]
One thing is clear,
Fox definitely seems like an insane place to work.
As we told you last week,
Fox reportedly has a dossier of alleged dirt on Tucker Carlson,
and he's not the only one.
They reportedly do it to all their on-air personalities.
One ex-Fox News anchor lamented...
And another departed Fox News host added...
That's insane.
They keep files full of damaging information
so they can use it against you later as blackmail.
Not only does NBC not have a file on me,
they don't even know what I do here.
Like, the other day, I saw an executive in the hallway,
and they said, "Hey, 'Weekend Update' was great on Saturday."
And I said, "Thanks, but I have my own show now."
And they said, "You do?
Well, we're sorry to see you go."
And I was like, "No, it's on -- it's on NBC."
And they said, "What time?"
And I said, "12:37 in the morning."
And then they laughed like that was a joke.
But it's not a joke time.
It's a real time.
[ Laughter ]
I didn't pick it, alright?
It wasn't like, "Oh, no, I want a seven in there."
[ Laughter ]
Anyway, the sense of panic and fear
over at the right's leading propaganda network
is emblematic of where the MAGA movement
is right now, broadly speaking.
Just look at Florida governor Ron DeSantis,
who's been sinking in the polls
after starting out with a lot of hype.
Look how nervous and shaky he is
now that he's hit some roadblocks
and has come under fire from Donald Trump.
-What will Ron DeSantis do?
He is trailing in the polls, struggling with endorsements.
And Trump clearly smells blood.
-According to a new "Wall Street Journal" poll
taken last week, Trump pulled in 48% of the support
among likely Republican primary voters.
The next person closest to him is DeSantis,
who is 24 points behind.
-I'm not -- I'm not a candidate.
So we'll see if and when that changes.
[ Laughter ]
-You guys know the last hole on a mini-golf course over here.
[ Laughter ]
I mean, that's one question. He answered one question.
And he looks like he's plunging 400 feet on a roller coaster.
[ Laughter ]
DeSantis is getting nervous
because Trump has been attacking him relentlessly,
both in public and behind the scenes.
For example, Trump's campaign
orchestrated a series of endorsements
from GOP members of Congress
from DeSantis' home state of Florida
specifically to embarrass DeSantis
and get inside his head.
Trump's aides have reportedly mocked...
And if anyone's capable of a mind[bleep] it's Donald Trump.
I mean, back in 2016,
Lindsey Graham said that if they nominated Trump,
the Republican Party would be destroyed
and they would deserve it.
And now he's on TV crying and begging
for supporters to send money to Trump's legal fund.
He probably has no memory of what happened in between.
His body's covered in Sharpie like the guy from "Memento."
[ As Graham ] "He's mind[bleep] you."
What the hell?
Mee-maw, have you been writing on me in your sleep again?
Told you to break the Ambiens in half, you witch.
[ Normal voice ] DeSantis is getting shaky
because the hype is giving way to reality
as election season gets closer.
I mean, I can't believe I'm saying this,
but the 2024 presidential election
is already ramping up, which is insane.
I can't stand how early these things start now.
The other day, my 5-year-old came home from school
and told me he launched an exploratory committee for 2076.
[ Laughter ]
Then I asked him if he has a super PAC,
and he told me, "No, that's just a backpack."
And that is today's "Politics Jokes for Kids."
[ Laughter ]
See?
[ Cheers and applause ]
Kids can watch "A Closer Look," too.
Anyway, enough of that [bleep] bull[bleep]
I'm sorry, sorry. Kids are watching.
Enough of that [bleep] nonsense.
Now, obviously, we're still a year and a half away,
so a lot could change, like, I don't know,
the Republican nominee could be running
while under house arrest.
[ As Trump ] Sleepy Joe has been a disaster for this country.
[ Beeping ] Sorry.
That's my ankle monitor.
My ankle monitor is very smart
and knows whenever I leave my house,
which means my probation officer will be here shortly
to escort me back home.
Probation?
We love probation, don't we, folks?
One of the best "bations."
It means you're a pro at bation.
And, of course, the only level above pro
when it comes to bation is master.
[ Normal voice ] And that's...
that's a politics joke for 12-year-olds.
[ Laughter ] NBC has asked --
[ Cheers and applause ]
NBC has asked us to hit all the major demographics.
So anyway, a lot can change.
But as of right now, the likely matchup we're looking at
is a rematch between Joe Biden and Donald Trump.
And voters really don't seem to want that.
-Americans are not excited about the prospect
of a Joe Biden/Donald Trump rematch.
-This is a rematch nobody wants.
-There is very little appetite on either side
of the political spectrum for a rematch here.
And as you see there, 70% do not believe
that Joe Biden should run for president again,
and 60% believe Donald Trump should not either.
-At this point, the Biden/Trump rematch
just feels like your six-month checkup at the dentist.
Like, when they ask you when you want to come back,
you want to say, "Never."
But, you know, you just have to pick
a random Tuesday in November and get it over with.
You guys remember how thrilling the 2008 election was?
Hundreds of thousands of people pouring into the streets
across the country, hugging and celebrating all night.
2008 was like a coked-up midnight rave
in a Brooklyn warehouse compared to 2024.
A Biden-versus-Trump rematch
is like a book club you feel obligated to attend,
even though everyone there annoys the [bleep] out of you.
"No, Jessica, I did not read the book.
No one read the book. I'm here for the wine.
And if you got a problem with that,
you can go eat, pray, and [bleep] yourself."
[ Laughter ]
"I read the cover, Jessica."
Even Biden's announcement
that he was running for re-election was sedated.
It was just a video message he posted
on the four-year anniversary of his first presidential bid.
Over the weekend, Biden joked about that announcement
at the annual White House Correspondents' Dinner.
-I just announced my re-election campaign.
[ Cheers and applause ]
Some of you --
Some of you scooped that I'd announced it in the video.
But really, you really all thought in your heart
that I just blurted it out, didn't you?
[ Laughter ]
-I mean, yeah, of course we did.
I just assumed that's how we'll find out if aliens are real.
[ As Biden ] Look, here's the deal, Jack.
When I was a kid growing up in Scranton,
I didn't have money for the bus, so I rode a bike.
Just like E.T. was real, by the way.
I met him.
Just met -- Just met E.T. at Area 51,
took him for a joyride in my Stingray.
[ Laughter ]
He just phoned home and he told them it was rad.
[ Laughter ]
[ Normal voice ] But, yes, Biden did announce his re-election bid
in a video message last week
as opposed to a live address, which was a good call.
That way if he wandered off at the end,
they could just edit that part out.
Look, we're never gonna stop using that video.
And you know why?
Because Republicans give us new content nonstop.
But for Biden, that's pretty much it.
Well, that and the stair thing.
[ Laughter ]
As we mentioned, Biden released that video
on the four-year anniversary of his first campaign launch,
which is crazy to me.
I can't believe it's been four years
since Biden first announced he was running for president.
Since then, we've had a pandemic,
an economic meltdown, a coup attempt.
It doesn't feel like four years. It feels like 40 years.
I mean, when was Trump's first announcement?
1912? Was it in black-and-white newsreel footage?
[ Announcer voice ] Here he comes, boys, the mammoth of Midtown,
the behemoth of business, the Colossus of crime,
Mr. Donald J. Trump himself.
Look at him waving as he rides down the escalator
from the Trump Tower food court.
Give 'em hell, Donald.
[ Normal voice ] And that's a joke for old people.
[ Laughter ]
We did it. We did it. [ Cheers and applause ]
We got all -- We got all the major demographics.
NBC is gonna be so happy
when they find out this show exists.
Wait, what's that?
The MAGA movement and their leading propaganda network
are in a state of panic and disarray
because they keep losing.
Their political project has been a disaster,
and now they're facing a series of electoral,
financial, and legal consequences.
Their top-rated host just got axed.
Their current front-runner is under criminal indictment,
and their next best hope is a guy
who looks like he just saw...
-...Martians peeing on prostitutes.
[ Laughter ]
Audio callback.
This has been "A Closer Look."
[ Cheers and applause ]
Hey, everybody, I just want to take a quick moment
to say that there's currently a negotiation going on
with the Writers Guild of America and the studios.
A strike might happen as of late tonight,
which means this show will be interrupted
and we won't be here to spend time with you.
I want to say how grateful I am
that both sides are sitting down at the table right now
and that they're negotiating.
And I'm hopeful that they will be able to come to an agreement.
This is a show that is built on strong writing.
Strong writing is essential to this show.
It's essential to any show where the host, myself,
is at best a C-plus performer.
Really got to have the jokes.
I love writing. I love writing for TV.
I love writing this show.
I love that we get to come in with an idea
for what we want to do every day
and we get to work on it all afternoon.
And then I have the pleasure of coming out here
and saying those words to you.
No one -- Look, no one is entitled
to a job in show business,
but for those people who have a job in show business,
they are entitled to fair compensation.
They are entitled to make a living.
I think it's a very reasonable demand
that is being set out by the guild,
and I support those demands.
But I also believe
that everybody at the table right now,
be it from the writers' side or the studio side,
knows that the future of this business
is dependent on storytellers.
And so I'm optimistic and hopeful
that because everyone at the table believes that,
they're going to hammer out a deal
and that I can be here with you tomorrow.
Because I promise, there is no place in the world
that I would rather be.
And I'm gonna be here the rest of the night.
We'll be right back with Chance the Rapper.