Last year, here at Comic-Con,
we had an unexpected guest drop in on us.
It did not go well.
I'll be honest.
He was booed off the stage.
Now he has demanded to come back and visit again.
This year, he's flown in directly from his top-secret lair
and golf club in Mar-a-Lago.
Please welcome Captain Make-America-Great-Again!
(audience cheering)
Hello everybody!
Wow, look at this!
Hello everybody.
How are you?
Good to see ya.
Thank you, Conan.
Good to see you.
You look tremendous.
Hello, everyone.
Thank you, Conan.
And, and, please, please, please.
(audience laughter)
Correction.
I am now no longer Captain Make-America-Great-Again.
I am President Captain Make-America-Great-Again.
(audience booing)
Wow, wow.
Listen to those woos.
They're going nuts.
I love it.
Sure.
I gotta be honest with you, I don't think those are woos.
Oh, sure they are.
That's how these nerds cheer.
(audience booing)
I have had the greatest year of any superhero
in the history of superheroes ever.
Hashtag ever.
Okay, well.
You know who's having. (audience laughter)
You know who's having an even bigger year?
Wonder Woman.
I'll be honest with you.
Wonder Woman had a great year. (audience cheering)
No, no.
Excuse me, excuse me.
I do not want to talk about crooked Wonder Woman, Conan.
All right?
She is a low-energy loser. (crowd booing)
No, no.
There she is.
What are you talking about?
She has the number one superhero movie this year.
What are you talking about?
(audience cheering)
Wait, wait, wait, hold on.
Please, all right.
I have proof there is widespread viewer fraud.
Now that sounds like
one of your crazy conspiracy theories.
I don't like her, all right?
She walks around with that lasso of truth.
Keep that thing away from me, Conan.
(audience laughter)
I can see why you might have a problem with that, yeah.
And you know what else?
I don't like San Diego.
Oh my God.
(audience booing)
This time of year, the entire town smells
like Jabba the Hutt died inside of a fish taco.
(audience laughter)
(audience booing)
Come on, come on.
Thank you, thank you.
Boo him all you want.
That was a good one.
(audience laughter)
Now, wait, wait.
If you hate it so much, in San Diego,
why'd you come back?
Well, my son wanted to check out Comic-Con
for his 40th birthday.
Come on out, Captain Make-America Jr.
(heroic music)
Look at him.
Now that is a high-quality person.
He looks tremendous!
Uh, Junior.
Junior, junior, junior. (laughs)
Are you enjoying Comic-Con?
Captain-Make-America-Great-Again Jr.,
are you enjoying it?
Oh yeah.
This morning, I went to a private panel in Room 823
at the Downtown Westin.
Okay, I'm sorry, that's confusing.
A private panel in a hotel room?
Yes.
It was just me and Captain Russia, Vodka Man,
and Anna Kournikova.
(audience cheering)
I told you to stay in the car, you idiot.
Conan, we gotta go.
Well, thank you very much for stopping in.
You guys really lifted our spirits.
We are leaving San Diego.
(audience cheering)
Just like the Chargers.
Hail Hydra.
Hail Hydra, okay.
(heroic music)
You really want to punch that son, don't you?