- [Voiceover] All right, clap.
(loud clap)
(giggle)
- What it do?
Welcome to Real Mature.
It's a show we made about things you do when you grow up.
One of the things you do when you grow up
is fall in love.
Today, we have three different pieces we made
about different people falling in love.
The first one features this guy.
He's Zach. - Hey.
So, "what it do," that gonna be your catchphrase?
(downtempo electronic music)
- There's this article that went viral about
a set of questions researchers developed
a few years ago.
- The idea is you can take two people,
and they'll sit down and ask these 36 questions,
and through that process they'll
fall in love with each other.
- We had Zach answer them with three different people
that he had three different relationships with,
and we wanna see, did it work?
Did he fall in love with any of them?
One of the people was a girl that he was
already friends with, and thinks is cute.
- Yeah, I mean, she's a cute girl.
- You think she's cute.
- (stuttering) Yeah I mean, she's...
Ryan, you think she's cute, right?
- Yeah, she's attractive.
- She's cute, yeah!
- I saw her, she's cute.
- [Zach] You said, "Pick a cute friend."
- Why do you feel noncommittal about
saying you're attracted to her?
- I think, I think that she's just a cute person.
Yeah, I'm attracted to her, that's fine to say.
- Now we're gonna watch some of the footage,
- [Zach] Oh, great. - [Henry] and see.
- All right, you ready to? - OK, ready?
- Ready to do this quiz? - All right.
- My perfect day would involve a bunch of kittens.
- (laughs) Mine would not!
- See, already, we can't fall in love,
'cause I say I like kittens and she doesn't.
- I feel like maybe that's your problem,
you just have a lot of deal breakers.
- I'm picky.
- Me and my dad had a terrible, because he was
drinking, we had a terrible relationship.
My name is Cheyenne, a lot of time I was called
"Cry-enne", 'cause I cried a lot.
- It's a pretty clever nickname.
- Anytime she's opening herself to me,
I make a weird face and then make a joke about it.
- That's, I think, a thing that you should work on.
- Me and my mother have a great reltionship.
I love my mom, she's been a constant
in my life that's helped me...
- [Cheyenne] That's cute! - [Zach] Stop it!
- Oh my god, it's so cute though!
- That was a moment.
- Yeah, she's...
Like, look at the way she's looking at you.
There is clear chemistry.
- I mean, you talk about how much you love your mom,
and girls like it.
Apparently.
She agrees.
- Absolutely.
- Tell your partner what you like about them.
Be very honest this time, saying things
you might not say to someone you've just met.
- Yeah, I think you're fun.
I think you're super cute.
Personality-wise and looks-wise, you're just a fun,
disarming person to be around.
- You're just a very smart, nice person to be around.
You're easy to talk to, good joking around about things,
but being serious when you need to be serious.
- She said I'm serious when I need to be serious.
- You could find love through this, Zach,
with all your suitors. - What about you?
- I'm only doing it with you!
So I'm in love with you?
- Love's a strong word.
- I'm in like with you?
- All right, I like you.
- I liked doing this, it was a good way
to get to know each other.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I liked it!
- Maybe we should hug or something.
- OK, let's hug.
- All right, it feels like you are totally
about to ask her out.
And feels like she would say yes in that moment.
Do you see that, watching it?
- What we both kind of agreed is, like,
if the cameras weren't, if we were like at home
doing this quiz and the cameras weren't rolling,
we probably would have made out at the end
of the video, realistically.
And then there's also that feeling like,
"Eh, she's a friend, keep it as a friend, who cares."
- Cause you're looking for love, that's who cares.
- Yeah.
(downtempo electronic music)
- We're gonna take a quick break from Zach's
experiment, and we're gonna watch a video
about a couple in love who work together,
but it's not like a normal kind of work together.
- What kind of working is it?
Let's find out.
(laughs)
(downtempo electronic music)
- Let's see how you're lookin'.
- OK, let me close my pants.
- They're gonna pick the five girls they think
look the best, and they're gonna call 'em out,
and they're gonna stand in a row,
and then do these ones together.
The same exact pose they came out
for the first 30 seconds.
If they're in the middle, that's the best spot.
That means they're comparing everyone
against the person in the middle.
If you're not in the middle, and you're pushed
to the outside, you're kinda fucked.
- Every morning you wake up and you, like,
discover a new vein or a new line, or...
You're just that much leaner, so it's fun.
But it gets to a point which, it's like,
gonna be Saturday, where you can't go any further.
(downtempo electronic music)
"Allow 30 minutes to dry before direct contact
"with clothes or water."
I'm gonna get orange!
- Wanna smoke?
(laughs)
- That happens when you're stoned, right?
- I'm just a tomboy, always have been.
I like track pants, and buns on the top of my head.
(laughs)
But it is fun to get girly every now and then.
It's easy to forget to have balance
and to have fun, and makes it extra hard
when you're in a relationship.
OK, so that's Justin and I on our wedding day.
Laying here feeling sicky on our anniversary,
reflecting about how douchelike I've been this prep.
(sniffles) I thought I was doing a good job
balancing life, the gym, and my work,
but thinking back, I've actually truly sucked
a big D about it.
Justin got the shaft, and even though I love the gym,
the gym without him is nothing but a bunch
of metal and B.O.
We're best friends, have so much fun together,
and party together, laugh together, get high together,
go eat 25 pounds of food and food coma ourselves together.
Yeah, I was just neglecting the fun stuff,
and the stuff that makes our relationship, our relationship.
I look like I'm from Texas.
- [Justin] This is the leanest I've seen your face.
- Yeah, it's weird.
- [Justin] You still look adorable though.
The more carb you eat,
the more fucked up your face looks,
but the better your body looks.
(group chatter)
- [Voiceover] Hey guys, happy Valentine's Day.
- Thanks, you too!
- I got out of it this year.
- Yeah, easy way out, planned that.
No butt shots!
(laughs)
(cheering)
- Yeah, it messes with your head a little bit.
You have to have balance, you have to have fun.
There's more to life than just the gym,
and just being lean, and having abs.
- I went up front, I'm like,
"What are you guys looking at?"
Everyone started laughing.
- That's why everyone was looking at me
the whole time. (laughs)
Done.
16 weeks of training
for 16 seconds of...
- Of just a joke.
It could have been maybe she was too hard
for the physique.
- And then they don't really like abs.
My abs are pretty chunky.
- It was just for fun, and that's what
this is all about, so, it's cool.
She's not even comparing herself to other people.
Most people shouldn't compare themselves to her,
and that's how it always should be.
We don't care, it's cool.
- It was cool.
(downtempo electronic music)
- Henry wanted me to get a stranger,
so I went on Tinder and I just started swiping.
I found this girl, Maddie.
Anyone that you, like, give a weird
proposition to on Tinder as your opening line,
they're like, "Yeah, sounds fun, let's do it!"
I'm like all right, yeah, I should meet you,
you seem cool.
- If you could wake up tomorrow having gained
any one quality or ability, what would it be?
I always want to know what people
are thinking about me.
- I just want blind confidence.
I feel like if I were just were like,
I struggle with insecurity and anxiety a lot,
so I feel like if I were just blindly
fucking confident I could do anything.
- Maybe it's a packaged answer.
In a romantic sense, I don't give myself
a chance to get into relationships, I don't think.
But I would like to.
But then I come up with excuses,
and I put blocks in my way.
- I've never really, really had a super serious boyfriend.
Kind of, but like four months, which I really don't think...
- Did you say you love him to him?
- No, I've never said it to anybody
in a romantic way.
- Alternate sharing something you consider
a positive characteristic of your partner.
Share a total of five items.
Fuck, I don't know.
- (laughs) This is hard, I know, I feel like
I really just met you!
- (laughs) Such little information!
You've got a great laugh. - Thank you.
You have kind eyes, I don't mean that in a weird way.
- Kind eyes? - [Maddie] Yeah!
- "Kind-eyes" Kornfeld.
They're hidden behind glasses. - I know.
- Yeah, I've got them baby blues.
I think also, this is unfortunate,
she was younger, and I felt a responsibility
to be appropriate.
I don't know.
I think I kept a distance,
a professional distance from her the entire time.
- Don't like it.
- I'm just saying, man.
- If I was on a date with a guy,
and he started asking me these deeper questions,
I actually think that'd be really cool,
and kind of a turn on, because it'd mean
that he's trying to get to know me
instead of just sitting there,
and trying to get laid, and it's awkward.
Like, I don't know.
- Complete the sentence.
I wish I had someone with whom I could share?
I just wish I had someone I could share my life with!
(laughs)
There's times where I'm just, like...
- Zach's lookin' for love.
- I'm lookin' for love, man.
- Aww.
- In your opinion, the 36 questions
may be a little aggressive for a first date.
- [Maddie] Yeah. - [Zach] Pretty good.
We both ended at the same place where we agreed
this questionnaire works.
I went from not knowing her, caring about her at all, to...
I kinda wanna see where, like, where's
she gonna be in a year?
What's she gonna do, what job is she gonna get?
I'm invested in her as a human.
- Are you guys Facebook friends or anything now?
- (laughs) No.
(downtempo electronic music)
- We're now gonna watch another video that
Ryan over here made.
Wave at the camera.
It's a video based on a post by our coworker Kristen,
who had a really just amazing story
about meeting her boyfriend
and falling in love with him
that we wanted to share.
- My name is Kristen, and my boyfriend
loves fat women.
(smooth acoustic guitar music)
Ironically enough, I met my boyfriend
during the thinnest month of my life.
I was at a friend's birthday party at a bar
when I saw my future boyfriend, Brian,
from across the room.
Brian was the type of guy I spent most of my life
pining after and never getting.
Slim, with dark hair and glasses,
his jeans torn in all the right places.
If I'd still been at my heaviest weight,
I never would have approached Brian.
But I was feeling brave, and I walked that crazy
all the way to the other side of the bar
and introduced myself to him.
There was a three hour period after Brian
first kissed me, where I felt like I could do anything.
In my mind, I had done the impossible.
At some point that night, I remember lying
next to him, still feeling unbelievably cocky
from my victory, when Brian mentioned,
"You aren't normally my type."
Oh, god, I thought.
Is this the part where he lets me know
how nice he is for throwing my chubby ass a bone?
"What's normally your type?" I asked.
"I like bigger ladies.
"Very big ladies, actually," he said.
But I am your type, I thought sadly.
Brian was attracted to fat girls,
and I was one of them.
This, of course, did not take away
from how into Brian I was.
We started dating almost immediately,
and became inseparable.
It was also during this time
that I started slowly putting a lot
of weight back on.
I put on a sundress that I thought might be
a little too backless for my current weight.
Brian, however, loved the dress.
Maybe even a little bit too much.
I spent a lot of time swatting his hands
away from the open back.
I felt happy wearing it.
Beautiful.
Then I wore it to a bar.
Brian turned to a mutual friend of ours,
and eagerly, drunkenly opined,
"Doesn't Kristen look amazing in that dress?"
The silence that followed felt like the moment
before someone hits the button on a dunk tank.
I realized that to Brian, I did look amazing
in that dress, because I looked fat.
It got to the point where compliments from Brian
were actually painful to hear.
Every time he said, "You look beautiful,"
all I could ever hear was, "You look fat."
Brian would carefully say, "I love your body
"because Kristen lives in your body."
And the worst part was that the more
I poked at myself, the more Brian would poke
at himself, too.
One morning I saw Brian looking at himself
in the mirror, grabbing the small pudge
from his stomach.
How many times had Brian felt like this?
Frustrated, annoyed, and helpless,
as he watched me tear down a thing he loved?
I wish I could say that I'm 100% OK with myself.
I'm trying to understand that just like
I'm not just a fat girl, Brian is not
just a person who likes fat girls.
Two years ago, I didn't even realize
they made bikinis in a size 18.
Turns out that they do, and this year
I intend to buy one.
and wear it to the beach.
I will enjoy how excited that makes Brian
to see me happy in my own skin.
I will let him enjoy the thing that he loves
without tearing it down.
But most importantly, I will work to earn
love from me, who will always play the hardest to get.
I will flirt as hard as I can,
and I will win myself back.
(electronic music)
- Another person we wanted Zach to try and fall
in love with was a dude he was already good friends with.
- Yeah, Keith.
To this point, I've probably seen Keith
naked as many times as any person I've ever seen naked.
I've done this quiz with two women already.
- Oh, OK.
- One element I didn't say to a perfect day
was it probably ends with sex.
- That's the thing, I couldn't tell, like,
when I was with the two girls, I wasn't
comfortable saying that my perfect date probably
involves getting laid.
If you could change anything about the way
you were raised, what would it be?
- That, I think for me, our family
never says "I love you" out loud for some reason,
I think that's the only thing that, like...
- I learned a lot about Keith,
questions I wouldn't have asked,
things that there's no reason to ask.
- You do look like you're falling in love here.
- I was!
- I really can't see anything. - [Zach] Yeah, me neither.
Where's it stop for you?
I also wanna say, me and the other girls,
we took like an hour.
Keith and I took two and a half hours.
(laughs)
Keith and I took forever to do this.
- That's crazy.
- 'Cause we just had so much fun!
Look at that, look at that laugh!
I didn't do that laugh for anyone else.
It's gotta start with me,
I just need to
believe I'm the great person I hope I am.
- You are an awesome person,
and I wanna hang out with you!
And Becky wants you to hang out with me.
It's like, "What's Zach doing?
"You should hang out with Zach!"
I think there's tons of people who love you,
and the only reason you're not dating someone
is either, you know, whoever you need to find
isn't found yet, or you're just not
opening yourself up to things that
may not be perfect.
- There was a point where Keith and I were talking
I almost said I love you,
and this is halfway through the quiz.
I'm like, you know I'm just gonna say it.
And I said I love you, he said I love you back,
it was a nice moment.
I think I already did love you.
- Yeah!
- But now I'm comfortable saying that.
- I think what is good about this exercise,
it allows me to understand more,
like, of where you come from.
- Do you feel like you love each other more now?
- Yes.
- That's beautiful.
- (both) We're both in this room feeling cool as a cucumber.
(laughs)
- Yeah it's good.
- What did we seek out to do?
We sought out for me to fall in love,
and I think with this, it didn't happen,
and that's fine.
But I think it did, through this process,
allow me to maybe learn a little bit
about myself and come to a place where maybe I'm...
- You're more ready to fall in love?
- Maybe I'm more ready.
- Who would you say you're most in love with
of these three? - [Zach] Absolutely Keith.
- I love that so much. - [Zach] No doubt in my mind.
- That's so fucking adorable.
(music)
- Let's wrap it up now, because
that's the first episode of Real Mature.
Thanks for watching, I don't know.
- What's your opening, how it is?
How you do? - What it do.
- What it do.
- [Henry] Real Mature is produced by the Buzzfeed IRL team.
This episode was made by me, Henry,
and Ryan B., with some help from Linda.
Colin made the weightlifting doc.
Special thanks to Zach, Keith, Kristen,
and Biro, who made many of the beats
you heard in this episode.
- (laughs) I'm the least fuckin' mature.
- All right, I'm done.
(electronic music)