- I wake up.
I am in a gurney in a hallway.
There's a Dean of students and a deputy who tell me
that I have been sexually assaulted.
I'm completely sure that they have the wrong person.
I have no recollection of even interacting
with anyone at this party.
I asked if I could use the restroom
and when I did, I discovered
that my underwear was missing.
I also noticed I had blood on the backs of my hands.
I knew something was wrong at that point.
I wasn't told what state I had been found in
and was sort of just released back
into the world and would not
hear from anyone for 10 days.
And I was at work and I opened up the news.
Read about the way I was found,
how one nipple is out and I'm half naked
and I understood why my
hair that morning had been full
of debris that I had to rake out.
It's like the insides of me just went mute.
And only when I went home that night
and sat my parents down to tell them, did it hit me.
The look on my mother's face was so broken open.
It instantly registered how
terrifying what happened was
and that's when I let go
of all that posturing and completely broke down.
My knees buckled, and my mom just held me.
I became extremely withdrawn.
I stopped speaking to people.
I would go to work and then I would go home
and I would cry and I'd wake up and I'd cry
and go to work.
And I couldn't continue that pattern.
Eventually you'll have to testify.
- The assailant, Brock Turner,
was a projected Olympic
athlete from Stanford University,
with means to defend himself.
Chanel, on the other hand was anonymous, known only
as Emily Doe and with no memory of the assault,
Turner's legal team got to write the script
of the star athlete with everything to lose.
- I knew that he was guilty.
If someone strips you, penetrates you,
and sprints away, they're guilty.
And over the course of a year and a half
I'd learned to doubt that clarity, to doubt myself.
In court the judge used words like "moderate,
less serious" to describe the crime.
The defense attorneys stood before the jury and said
"Chanel knows how you get in blackouts.
And that's what she did this night
and many other nights, to be honest."
I did not speak.
When it happened I remember asking the detective,
“Does this happen a lot?”
And he said, "You're in the smallest percentage."
That few even get reported
and even fewer have witnesses.
This is your opportunity.
I realized all these doors are opening for me
that don't often get open for victims.
I had this responsibility.
It doesn't matter anymore
if I can't work, if I can't sleep.
This never happens.
There was a chance that justice was waiting at the end.
And that was the turning point where I thought,
all right, this is it.
I'm going to fight for myself.
I understand now what they're doing
and I will do everything it takes.
- You drew a line.
- I drew a line.
- It was Brock Turner's father,
Dan Turner, who stood up in the court
in a character reference for his son.
It reads, "Brock's life has been deeply altered forever
by the events of January 17th and 18th.
His life will never be the one that he dreamed
about and worked so hard to achieve."
- Brock's father complained
that the verdict was a steep price to pay
for 20 minutes of action.
- Calling the rape 20 minutes of action
created a firestorm on social media.
- It just shows the amount of ignorance.
- And like, what do you think
the woman had to deal with?
- Turner was only sentenced
to six months in prison for his crime.
He was a free man within three.
- I was completely in shock.
I felt like I had failed.
We had a chance, that's more than
most victims will ever get.
- Chanel would have to face Brock Turner
one last time.
She asked the judge if she could read her statement
directly to Turner.
- You cannot give me back
the life I had before that night.
I used to pride myself on my independence.
Now I'm afraid to go on walks in the evening.
It took me eight months to
even talk about what happened.
You bought me a ticket
to a planet where I lived by myself.
There are times I did not want to be touched.
I have to relearn that I'm not fragile.
I am capable.
I am wholesome, not just livid and weak.
You should have never done this to me,
but here we are, the damage is done.
No one can undo it and now we both have a choice.
We can let this destroy us.
I can remain angry and hurt
and you can be in denial,
or we can face it head on.
I accept the pain.
You accept the punishment and we move on.
But right now you do not get to shrug your shoulders
and be confused anymore.
You do not get to pretend that there were no flags.
You have been convicted of violating me,
intentionally, forcibly, with malicious intent.
Figure out how to take
responsibility for your own conduct.
- Chanel wouldn't get
that acknowledgement from Brock,
but her words did spark an immediate response online.
One day after Brock's sentence
Chanel's statement went viral.
The whole world had read it.
The entire statement was
read aloud in America's Congress.
- You don't know me, but you have been inside me
and that's why we're here today.
- It became a catch cry for women
around the world who felt they'd been failed.
- You don't know me, but you've been inside of me.
- You were getting cards sent
to you from the district attorney.
People just wanted to connect with you
even though they didn't know who you were.
- All the cards just said, we wish you healing.
It was really incredible.
One note from a girl named Amanda
who said, "For the first time, since the incident
almost two years ago, I feel like I have a voice.
I feel weirdly at peace.
I am fueled.
I can speak.
I cannot be silent anymore.
The duct tape is off and I will speak.
I hope that you have many days
where you raise your arms
in victory and feel powerful.
You earned it.
Love, the girl who's suffering has officially ended
due to your letter."
I learned that everything I've experienced is universal.
Every feeling I've had is human.
Now I wake up really happy with what I'm doing.
I feel like I'm able to finally absorb all the love
that was coming in and that I will continue to
strengthen myself because
that's what people want for me.
We may spend half our time wandering around
wondering what we're even doing here,
why it's worth the effort.
But living is an incredible thing.
Just to have been here,
to have felt the volume and depth of others empathy.
I wrote most of all to tell you
I have seen how good the world could be.
Seek whatever you wish to be in life.
Speak up when they try to silence you,
stand up when they shove you down.
No one gets to define you.
You do.
On nights when you feel alone, I am with you.
When people doubt you or dismiss you, I am with you.
So never stop fighting.
I am with you.