- Hi, I'm Ziwe, and I'm here with Buzzfeed
to read my Thirst Tweets.
(upbeat jazz music)
Number one, "ziwe is so sexy and cool.
I love badass women."
Wow, that's really nice.
I love compliments.
So, I really love this segment already.
"This is now @Ziwe Stan account.
Please watch her show.
Her brain, iconic. Heart."
Taste, taste!
I'm excited that you guys are excited
about season two of my show.
When I tell you the guests are,
the lineup is stacked.
Charlamagne, Chet Hanks, DeuxMoi, Mia Kkalifa
Nicole Byer, Hannibal Buress, Ilana Glazer.
It's yeah, it's great.
"ziwe's smile makes me feel like
everything is going to be ok"
How do you feel now?
"Ziwe is so stunning in every single photo
and on every single IG live!!
I would probably faint if I saw her irl."
If you fainted after seeing me I would be so concerned.
I would be like, are you okay?
Do you need help?
Do you need water?
How's your tummy?
That's really kind.
But if you ever cross paths, don't faint.
I promise I'm a regular person.
I'm really nice too.
"I did NOT know what to expect with that Ziwe show...
that (beep) is hilarious, she's smart,
she's a real live troll and she's gorgeous!"
Yes, I'm a real live troll like the Smurfs.
Smurfette, I'm a Smurfette.
I actually, now that I think of it, I've never done...
Like my outfits are sort of inspired.
Like right now, my outfit's kind of Bratz style
but I've never done a Smurfette outfit.
Are they trolls?
A lot to think about.
"I want ziwe to come into my house,
slap me in the face and tell me to get my (beep) together.
I feel like I'd listen to her."
What?
I'm not gonna slap you.
You listen to your heart.
When it's calling for you,
listen to your heart.
There's nothing else you can do.
I don't know where you're going.
And I don't know why.
Listen to your heart before it tells you goodbye.
I think that's a love song,
but in this case make it a love song to yourself.
Trust yourself.
You don't need me.
"God, Ziwe is an instant classic.
One of the most hilarious comedians of our time.
She's also very hot."
Thank you, I like that, she's also very hot.
Got its own break line.
Because it's like not only am I quote,
"one of the most hilarious comedians of our time,
I'm also hot."
And you know what?
That is the representation that
girls with symmetrical faces need.
Like, I'm glad I could be that person.
"I've never been as in love with, obsessed with,
or as jealous of anyone as I am of Ziwe."
Wow, so this is a lot of, I feel like we, thank you.
Can you feel the shift in my demeanor?
Suddenly I'm like just uncomfortable
with all the compliments.
That's how you know I'm a Pisces.
Ah, don't look at me.
Don't perceive me.
Thank you.
I'm obsessed with you and I'm obsessed with
I'm jealous of you.
Okay, next question.
Our next tweet, rather.
Tweet on Elon Musk's Twitter.
Shout out to him, an African American.
"what I love about Ziwe is that
despite being supremely intelligent and funny,
she hasn't lost sight of what's important in life:
being hot and serving looks"
Wow!
I love it.
So my aesthetic is working.
Okay, when I read tweets like this,
what I hear is that you guys love Bratz dolls.
You guys love cinema.
You love looks.
You love serving.
You love aesthetic.
I'm very lucky that you guys would say
such nice, kind things about me.
Thank you.
But I'm even more lucky to have an audience
that has such impeccable taste.
I am merely a cog in the taste machine
and you guys are churning out the granola
or I guess it wouldn't be granola.
Snowpiercer, I don't know.
"Can ziwe marry me?
Can Ziwe and I get married?
Ziwe call me if you're interested ill marry u!!
Someone tell ziwe we can get legally married
in the country of USA TM"
I'm not getting married,
but I support those endeavors.
Shout out to you.
Thank you.
It would be really funny if I got married
to people so they could watch my show.
But all of my audiences are my partners in life.
"Ziwe is so (bleep) fine."
Great, that was straight to the point.
I like that.
A lot of comments about my boobs,
comments about my lips,
comments about styling, my styling.
I'm styled by Pamela Shepherd.
I have a great, great team.
Thank you so much for tweeting at me.
You know what will really help,
if you guys love me tweet about the show.
And tell people to watch the Iconic episode.
But yeah, thank you so much for your time.
(upbeat jazz music)