- You may have hated it, but that Game of Thrones
Ed Sheeran cameo was way more important than you think.
Game of Thrones came roaring back with a vengeance
last night, ooh, that Arya scene.
Was tight, that was dope.
And from Dragonstone to Baby Bones,
the show was setting off more bombs than Cersei
at the Sept of Baelor, but F all that
'cause when all was said and done,
there was only moment everyone wanted to talk about,
the debut of a new GoT villain more despised than Joffrey
and Ramsay combined, I speak of course
of the wretched Ed Sheeran, yes, your single middle-aged
aunt's favorite recording artist made his big
Game of Thrones debut last night and let's just say
that the response wasn't perfect.
In fact, it left a lot of fans seeing fire.
Ed, we know you were crying out to viewers, give me love!
But they just wanted to see the shape of you
and hopefully that shape was gnawed to death
by a pack of roving direwolves.
No, the internet did not respond well to the ginger
maestro's appearance as the resident pop star
in the Lannister army, but that doesn't mean
it wasn't important.
From the Rains of Castermere to the Bear
and the Maiden Fair, the songs on Game of Thrones
usually hide a deeper meaning than you'd expect
and the tune Sheeran crooned last night,
which was titled Hands of Gold, was no exception.
In fact, if you had managed to get past your blinding hatred
for poor Ed and actually listened to what he was singing,
you may have gotten a few cool clues
about what to expect in the upcoming season.
But we know overcoming Ed Sheeran hatred
is just too much to ask of our viewers, so we're gonna do
you a solid and break down the song right now.
So as we said, the song is called Hands of Gold
and it originally appeared in the books
but there it was a song about Tyrion
and his long-since strangled former flame Shae.
Now the long story short version of that is,
a singer found out about Tyrion's affair
and composed the song in order to extort money out of him.
Now in the books, Tyrion actually recites the lyrics
as he's killing but obviously, at this point at the show,
is about three seasons past Tyrion's tryst
so the question becomes, why bring the song in now?
Well a lot of people are theorizing that the lyrics
can still be applied to a Lannister, just not Tyrion,
but hmm,
what other Lannister could Hands of Gold
possibly be talking about?
Oh I don't know, maybe the one with a literal hand of gold.
Oh, yes, the theory is that Ed may have been singing
about Jaime Lannister, so just listen to the lyrics.
♫ For she was his secret treasure
♫ She was his shame and his bliss
- She was his secret treasure,
she was his shame and his bliss.
Oh man, that sure does sound to me like it could be about
a dude who knows that he should stop having sex
with his sister but just can't bring himself to stop.
Now we now what you're saying, Jaime and Cersei's sibling
sex is hardly a big plot reveal, we've known about that
since episode one, don't tell me I suffered through
an Ed Sheeran cameo just for that.
Well calm down because there's a little bit more,
but this is where it's important to pay attention
to who's singing, and no, not just Ed,
but his entire band of brothers.
Now, these are Lannister soldiers, yes,
but they're Lannister soldiers who clearly have no love
for the banner that they carry.
In fact, they despise King's Landing so much
that it actually stops Arya
from slaughtering the pack of them.
Now this is obviously setting up the massive amount
of unrest springing up under Cersei's rule.
She's clearly gone mad with power since last season
or at least madder with power
and she's getting ready for a war that even her beloved
brother seems to know they can't possibly win.
Now someone is going to have to take her down eventually
and as eager as Arya may be for the gig,
the song seems to suggest that her demise will come
at the golden hand of her little brother,
just as that prophecy foretold.
Sure, we all assumed that meant Tyrion,
but Jaime is her little brother too,
even if it's only by a few seconds.
But what do you folks think?
Did this reveal redeem the Ed Sheeran cameo for you
or do you want more British pop stars
in Game of Thrones now?
Could One Direction white walkers be on their way?
Goddamn, that would be, no.
Let's discuss. (chuckles)