- I reacted to medical scenes from "Family Guy"
and nearly 10 million of you said, "More."
So here we go.
Huge thank you to ShipStation for sponsoring this video.
Be-woop!
- Hello, my name's Johnny Knoxville,
and I'm gonna take a shotgun blast to the face.
(gun banging)
(men laughing)
- That's literally what the show is though,
especially lately.
- You know what?
We should try some of that stuff.
- No, you shouldn't.
Every episode says that these are
trained stunt professionals,
and there are medical professionals standing by
- I'm Peter Griffin, and this is shopping cart roof,
roof, roof, shop, roof shopping cart.
- That's how a lot of the names of the things are.
- Okay, go.
Ow, ow, ow.
- Oh, that is not a normal configuration of Peter's body.
- What does it look like?
What do I do?
- It looks like your vertebral bodies have shifted.
That's a spinous process out backwards.
- I'm scared.
I'm scared.
I'm sc-
- Oh, how did he vomit?
- Does this get fixed with ice or heat?
- No.
ER with a C collar and a rapid CT scan.
- Your blood work shows that your liver
isn't functioning properly.
Now, the most obvious step
would simply be to stop drinking.
- Or?
- Well, that's the most obvious step.
A lot of times we see a pattern
on the inflammatory liver enzymes
where the AST is double the ALT,
and that can signal that potentially
it's alcohol-induced liver injury.
- Well, we do have these pills
that may correct the enzyme imbalance in your liver.
- We don't have that for alcohol-induced liver injury.
That doesn't exist.
- Can we do what we normally do
where you roll it up in a piece of cheese
like you're fooling me?
- Yeah, I guess.
But then you're gonna have cheese in your ass.
- Wait, what?
- See, I did this whole video
where I was telling people how I give Bear capsules,
and everyone's like, "Just put it in cheese."
But if it's a capsule, the dog can't chew it,
otherwise all the powder that's inside the capsule
spills out.
So capsules, you gotta trick them.
The way that I do it is just shove it down Bear's throat.
- Yeah, the doctor said
I gotta give you these pills the butt way.
- Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
That is not happening.
- Why don't they just say suppository?
Why does he say butt way?
- Ah! (growls)
- (gasps) What the hell?
You, you bit me!
- For dog bites, a broad spectrum antibiotic like Augmentin.
And make sure your tetanus is up to date.
Your tetanus vaccine, I mean.
- Mrs. Griffin, it's a good thing you brought this child in.
- Why? Is he okay?
- I'm afraid he's very sick.
In fact, his lab work shows
he's suffering from Hodgkin's Lymphoma.
- That wouldn't be just a lab diagnosis.
- Are you saying Scotty has cancer?
- I don't know, I didn't read the whole Wikipedia entry.
But the good news is that what he has is highly treatable.
- By the way, people judge doctors for looking things up.
We can't maintain all of the information in our minds.
Nor is it useful, 'cause a lot of the guidelines,
which we use to make decisions on what to do, change,
and they change based on the newest evidence.
And research comes out a mile a minute,
so you can't keep up with all of it.
So if your doctor looks things up
to be thorough and careful, that's a good thing.
(Dr. Hartman coughing)
- Oh, for God's sake.
- Look, do you have any idea
how expensive medical school is?
- No, I don't.
- Well, it's probably pretty expensive.
- Probably pretty expensive.
He didn't even go to med school.
You don't need to tip your doctor.
In fact, I think giving your doctor
anything worth more than $30
is considered unethical or maybe even illegal.
But what I will say is that the cost of healthcare going up
has very little to do with doctor salaries,
and all almost everything to do with
the rise of administrators.
Back to "Family Guy" in just a second,
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All right, let's get back to the "Family Guy."
- Now, you see that barbell over there?
Go ahead and try and lift that.
(Stewie grunting)
- Yeah, two-year-old should not be power lifting in the gym.
- I got something that'll get him going.
- Oh my God.
- Well, if there's anyone I can trust,
it's a stranger at the gym holding a dirty needle.
Here, Stewie, try this.
- I feel like when people go to the gym,
they suspend all skepticism if a person is jacked.
So like if you see a person that's jacked,
you're like, "Every piece of advice they are giving
is the equivalent of a certified PhD athletic trainer
giving it to you."
Most cases, it's just bro science.
- Well, will you look at me?
I have the power!
♪ He-man ♪
- Hello, family.
- Why are his legs so weak, though?
Get some symmetry, brah.
- Hey, what the hell?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Is it a problem?
Huh, you want go?
You want to go?
- Testosterone rage, steroid rage,
actually real and does happen.
- What are you talking about?
- I'm talking about go.
That's what I'm talking about.
First one's on the house.
- One of the side effects
to enhanced exposure to testosterone
is that you are willing to take on more risk.
Not even that you just get angry,
you are literally willing to put your life in danger.
You start driving more aggressively.
You start speeding more.
All the things that you associate with kids doing
when they're having peak levels of testosterone
is what happens.
- Stewie, did you hire three Mexican guys
to shake a soda can and give it to my boss?
- What?
One's Guatemalan.
- Damn it, Stewie, you got me fired.
- Get your hands off me.
I'll go floppy dead weight on you.
- (groans) Oh crap, my stomach.
I think my hernia ruptured.
- The danger with hernias is less about rupture
and more about incarceration of bowels,
where the bowels actually poke through the hernia,
then get strangulated
because the hernia cuts off circulation
to the piece of the bowel that went through,
and then essentially chokes it out and has it die.
That's a medical emergency,
'cause if you don't correct that, you can die from it.
Outside of what common knowledge might be,
that if you have a big hernia,
it's more likely to get choked out.
That's not true.
It's actually the small hernias
that have a higher rate of incarceration
rather than the big ones.
The big ones are usually the reducible ones
that you can just like push the abdominal contents back in.
(tires screeching)
- Oh!
- Oh God, buddy, I'm sorry, you okay?
(dramatic music)
- Why is the chicken always here?
(fists thudding)
- I don't know why these cartoons,
they always show the facial trauma
as like tic-tac-toe squares on their faces.
I don't know what's a better fight,
this or me versus iDubbbz.
(machines crackling)
The blunt force trauma that both of them have experienced
is really impressive that they keep going.
(chicken squawking)
When you get electrocuted, by the way,
your body doesn't light up like an x-ray
where you can see your bones.
I hope that goes without saying.
I feel like a lot of THC was consumed
in the creation of this clip, and that's my medical opinion.
- Three adults and one infant please.
- Nice try, lady.
That kid's at least three.
- What? That's insane.
Brian, do I look old to you?
- You look fine.
- The museum manager just said I looked over two.
That's mid-toddler.
- Actually, that's something we do in the doctor's office.
When a patient comes in, part of our objective thing
is patient appears stated age
or patient appears older than stated age.
- Stewie, what the hell did you do to yourself?
- Nothing. Almost nothing.
Just a little Botox.
Little filler, maybe some strings.
- So cute.
- Let me guess, 10 months?
- Oh my God, my new look is working.
I'm back into months.
- He should have just used an Instagram filter
like everybody else.
- Stewie, you got more plastic surgery?
- I know it was a mistake.
- Doctor, this is Stewie.
He needs you to help fix his face.
- Oh, absolutely, I can do that.
- Great.
Is it a simple procedure?
- Oh sure, we just break every bone in his face
and then smoosh them back into position.
- Or you could use the dissolving liquid for the fillers.
- Wow, Dr. Hartman really did a good job.
- Yep.
He told me bedrest and ice packs for two days so it can set,
but I'm not missing picture day.
- Huh.
You sure you shouldn't listen to the doctor?
- Brian, I know what I'm doing.
- [Photographer] One, two, three.
(dramatic music)
- You know, we're laughing and attacking Botox here,
but the reality is Botox actually has some medical utility.
In times where we wanna shut down the activity
over an overactive muscle, we can use Botox.
I've seen it used quite successfully for migraines,
certain types of spasms, jaw tightness like TMJ.
So there are utilities outside of cosmetic purposes.
I actually immigrated to the US from Russia
when I was six years old.
In this video, I tell that whole story with full animation.
Click there to check that out.
Also don't miss out on your 60-day free trial to ShipStation
by visiting shipstation.com/drmike.
And as always, stay happy and healthy.
(upbeat dance music)