we want to get to a big story the one
that's been heartbreaking to tell you
about students and teachers at Lake Mary
High School mourning the death of a 17
year old girl who took her life on
campus yesterday now deputies say the
11th grader left class yesterday morning
and said she was going to the restroom
but she went to the auditorium and shot
herself family members told us yesterday
she hadn't been herself lately because
of a breakup anytime we see situations
like this whether they occur on a school
campus or in a neighborhood or
somebody's home we want to remind the
public that if there are signs of
depression if there's something that we
can do or you can do when you know
somebody who's grieving and you know
somebody who's suffering there are
services and love and guidance and faith
and people who would do everything that
they can to ensure that you receive the
proper assistance and help that you need
those services those ways of protecting
those you love all of that starts at
home starting that conversation with
your child about mental health
joining us now Janie Lacey a
psychotherapist and owner of life
counseling solutions in Maitland and I
know when we all heard about this
yesterday when it started developing I
mean it's just gut-wrenching especially
as parents to think about this and I
know one thing a lot of people are
struggling with right now I'm seeing on
social media a lot of my friends talking
about how do they talk to their children
about what happened especially those
that go to Lake Mary High School I mean
I know it's a lot to kind of delve into
but how do we start you know the first
thing that we can do is with incidents
like this is we can actually evaluate
our relationship with our kids because a
lot of times kids are not going to come
and talk to us if we don't already have
a true relationship and we haven't built
it along the way so the first thing I
always tell parents is first look at
this and kind of look at your
relationship with your with your
children or your teens and then start
having a conversation about how they
feel about it right and just listen
because many times as parents if we
think about ourselves when we were once
children why did we not talk to her
parents we didn't think they listened to
us we thought they were going to judge
us we thought they were gonna tell us
for making bad decisions whatever that
may be so we have to be a safe place so
when our teens or our children do get to
a place of trouble or emotional disturb
that wiii be the first person or the
first source that they come to what are
some of the warning signs you can look
for because of course you know the
teenage years can be really tough and we
talked about that a lot it seems these
days it's even harder with some of the
social pressures and things like social
media what what can we do to combat that
or try to equal equalize that for them
well what we'll see is many times we
will say well it's just the face are
going through or it's just regular teen
behavior but we need to know our teens
and their patterns so if there's
something that changes in their pattern
whether it's their mood whether it's
their grades whether they're not hanging
out with the same friends and it can be
a subtle change but we want to tune in
to see what's going on with them and
that's usually when we kind of look back
at those that have been at risk or those
that have been successful in committing
suicide we look back and those were some
of the subtle signs that parents are
those that are close to them will report
but they were either subtle or sometimes
there are something that's really
noticeable but they're not at a place
where they were able to connect and open
their teen open up with them yeah and
we're hearing from different sources you
know and the sheriff saying there that
you know friends and family it said that
this young lady had not been herself the
last few days and you think a few days
we all get in a funk and or maybe not
ourselves for a few days but when do you
know that just you really need to take
some sort of action I mean this is just
so so tragic and so frightening I think
whether it's a funk or if it's just a
moment that parents need to be in tuned
and you need to be there they may hate
you for the moment but they will love
you for the lifetime so that's where if
you have the relationship you've already
built in with them then you can be in
tuned and be able to be that safe place
for them but especially if you know
what's going on in your teens life
whether it was a relationship whether
they had friends that are changing you
want to be involved and you want to know
and that's being proactive but if
they're in that funk you want to let
them know that you're there for them you
don't want to pressure them but you want
to create a presence that's safe and
that's consistent and be right there on
the forefront with them so what's the
next step if you decide that you want to
get them some counseling or some care
and maybe they're saying I don't want it
or maybe you're running into trouble
finding a place to take them in
you know a decent amount of wait time
well there's still a lot of stigma
around mental health and counseling so
it's important that you let them know
that there's nothing wrong with them
there's something that you know we have
something when we get a cold we go to
the doctor or if we have others
illnesses or other types of things that
are we just want to get a check-up we go
to anal to let them know that it's a
safe thing and it's healthy for them and
if they're resistant go with them go
with them sit in with the session let
them know that it's safe and let them
know that it's because you care about
them so explaining to them and being
along with them on the journey is gonna
be important versus just dropping them
off and and you go your way yeah
all right was such good information
thank you so much absolutely and we want
to give this to you again if you feel
like you need this or know anyone who
does you can call the national suicide
prevention hotline seven days a week 24
hours a day that number eight hundred
two seven three eight two five five
again right there on your screen eight
hundred two seven three eight two five
five