Man, all you gotta do is go over there and spit your game.
Girls love a confident man.
Confidence, gotcha.
Hi. Would you like to buy a ticket
for the Kid's Night Out Fundraiser?
There'll be games and food,
and all the money goes to the Science Club.
Uh, uh, uh.
I gotta go pee-pee.
Guess all that confidence
is about to get flushed down the toilet.
[toilet flushing]
Wait, you don't know the answer to that?
No, I don't.
Don't ask me.
What? Why not tell me?
That's your homework, kid.
If I gave you the answers, I won't be helping you.
I'm here for you, man.
Chuckles, don't worry. Help is on the way.
Lucky for you, you're related
to the biggest ladies man that ever lived.
Dad?
The fact that you said that tells me
that you have a long way to go.
I'm talking about me.
I'm a black belt. in Swagfu.
Teach me your ways.
School is in session.
So... Why do ladies love rappers?
'Cause they got that swag locked and lit.
But what if you don't have swag already built into your DNA?
Okay, I think--
Fake it till you make it.
Are you ready, Tacos?
I don't know. There's no way she's going to say yes.
Pssh. That's why we've got a plan, man.
I go in strong, you get my back with the hype.
All you're gotta say, is, "yeah".
Yeah?
Okay.
Say it with that chiz. Yeah.
Yeah.
That's what I'm talking 'bout. Aight. Ready? Let's go.
And look, just because I know a lot about rap
and performing and you don't,
I'm sure you're going to do great.
[chuckles] Thanks?
And look, don't worry about remembering
all those pages of lyrics. You got this.
Yeah. I got this.
And the crowd, you'll get used to
all those eyeballs staring at you,
watching your every move.
Every move?
It's no biggie. The worst that can happen is you mess up
and the whole school laughs at you.
Yeah.
Well, break a leg.
You're doing the Weasel Scouts again?
Not weasel, Squirrel Scouts.
Paw salute. [grunting]
Yo, man, don't do that.
People might actually see you.
Good because Squirrel Scouts are honorable,
thrifty, helpful and prepared.
And that's the best way for you not to eat
at the cool table during lunch.
What's American kissing?
Do y'all know anything? Where you from, Canada?
American kissing is like this. Take notes.
- Got that, babe? - Yep. I got that.
- Okay. - Write it down.
And French kissing is...
And these swap spit.
Is that a French kiss or a zombie?
They both look the same to me.
Don't you want me to sing on the new one?
Yeah, I think I'm going to ride solo on this next one.
But you heard Bethany, I mean,
people are expecting to hear more from me.
I-I need to keep this thing going.
Well, that's the rap game for ya.
One day, you're Jay-Z, the next you're Jay-B.
Who's Jay-B? I've never heard of him.
Exactly.
Why you still hanging out with those guys?
They're bad news. Trust me. This is not your thing.
You should be hanging out with the Math Club or something.
Well, maybe this is my new thing.
No, it's not.
Look, you heard Mommy Yas.
If you get in trouble one more time,
that's a wrap for you.
I'm telling you, if it don't make dollars,
then it don't make sense.
Oh, that's good.
I know it is, Chuck.
Money's all that matters. Cash over everything.
Well, sure, but what about...
Nah, man, nah.
Whatever you gonna say, money first.
Then you can just buy everything else.
What about friends and family, though?
You can buy them, too, for the right price.
I wish that was true.
[screaming]
Don't scare me like that, cous', unless you're trying to get got.
Yeah, okay.
Hey, we have to bounce.
Nose flick him.
Look I'm going to tell y'all one more time.
My cous' is too delicate to hang out with y'all.
I'm afraid Dylan is right, you guys. Sorry,
Dylan, you got something... right in here.
Ooh. Ooh. [laughing]
That... was savvy.
We got a great prank in mind,
but need the new prank king to help. You in?
I'm in. Thanks.
A prank king?
And I forgot to mention,
Nice hat, Chuckles. You're really pulling it off.
You think so?
Yep. Don't stop doing you. You know, unless you want to.
No, I'm good.
We need to talk, young man.
How you gonna do me like that in front of everyone?
[zipping]
Can't say you didn't deserve it.
This group got you headed down the wrong path.
Got you nose flicking your own family.
Do you want to be known as The Nose Flicker?
Huh? Do you young man?
Maybe.
Look, I don't have time for whatever this is.
My new friends are waiting on me.
Well, you better make some time because this is serious.
And just where are y'all going?
I'm going out to prove all those things
you said about me are not true.
Yo, Chuckles is soft, mushy, delicate, weak arms.
[grunting]
Dang it.
Okay, let's review homework.
First question.
How many miles did Mary walk?
Dylan. Your answer?
Who cares? Mary needs a car.
Girls don't like when you talk too much.
So you're gonna have to talk without using words.
That means, "What's up?"
And that means, "How are you doing, Boo?"
And that means, "Yo, why you all up in my grill?!"
They all look the same.
Dylan, I'm not all up in your grill.
[gasping] I understood that one.
Alright, now, uh, Charlie,
what's next on the merit badge agenda?
We could work on my first aid badge.
- Hmm. - First aid? Man, that's easy.
All right, so [unintelligible] tells you,
if you can walk, you're good.
If you can't, call a doctor.
Yo, Chuckles.
I don't think it's a good idea to skate out here.
People might see you, and it might affect your rep.
Oh, you're right.
They might make me too popular.
Not even close to what I meant.
Ain't you ever heard of the "I have a dream" speech?
Yeah. That speech didn't rhyme.
No, but that dude got flow.
Did you just call Dr. Martin Luther King... dude?
♪ They thought I couldn't do it ♪
♪ But I'm back With another one ♪
♪ Popping like I caught The whole class ♪
♪ Chewing bubble gum Your idol ♪
Nah, nah, nah, cut that, cut that, cut that.
Come on, you need some swag. Put some confidence in yourself.
Look, look, look. Look at this.
♪ I'm teaching And I'm dreaming ♪
♪ So, you know I keep on praying ♪
♪ They vote me As their favorite ♪
♪ 'Cause they got me On their play list ♪
- Yeah. - Sir. Let's go.
You've got this man.
Confidence.
I'm gonna even put my headphones on for this one.
Let's go.
♪ They thought I couldn't do it ♪
♪ But I'm back With another one ♪
♪ Popping like I caught The whole class ♪
♪ Chewing bubble gum Your idol, the highest title ♪
♪ I came to take it I went from grading papers ♪
♪ Every day to making paper ♪
♪ I'm teaching ♪ ♪ And I'm dreaming ♪
♪ So, I had To keep on praying ♪
♪ That I'm voted me As the favorite ♪
♪ 'Cause they got me On they play list ♪
Yes! Ooh!
- Yes, sir! - Yes!
That's Mr. Battle.