I loved how ridiculous she looked in the dress.
And that's Table Talk.
[MUSIC PLAYING]
Hey guys, what's going on?
We talk about things you sent in using #TableTalk
and on our Reddit, r/sourcefed.
I'm Meg Turney.
I'm Philip Defranco.
I'm Trisha Hershberger.
I didn't know that was a legit intro.
I didn't either.
I just went with it.
We just went with it.
It was cool.
We go with the flow.
Fighting bears and stuff.
You know, the uszh.
I like how weird she looks in dresses.
Hey guys.
How's it going?
Hey guys.
All right. @ethanark00 says, would you
find it weird having sex with the namesake of your sibling
or parent?
Yes.
Really?
Yes.
So if you have a dad named Jerry,
you could never bang a dude named Jerry?
Nope.
How is that not weird to you?
I don't know.
They have a different last name.
My brother's name is Rob.
I could never be like, ah Rob.
Ew.
Attach yourself to a middle name.
Maybe.
If I was with a girl named-- if someone had a dad named Phil,
and they were dating me, I'd say call me James,
or call me DeFranco.
No don't call me DeFranco.
That's weird.
Hey DeFranco.
Because we're talking about specifically
that it's weird in sexy time talk.
It's weird in the bedroom.
You can't be like, oh--
What's your dad's name?
I love that face that you just made.
I could never be like, oh, Dustin.
And even thinking, oh, Dustin, is so weird.
Three Dustins were like, fuck!
Yeah, and to have your boyfriend's name is this,
but in the bedroom you only refer to them
by their middle name.
Ok, that's weird, too.
Here's the thing.
Tell me if this is weird.
I think people who go by their middle name,
you know people that just go by their middle name.
I think calling them their first name is sexy.
It's this forbidden name.
Oh, it's a special private connection.
How many names do you have?
I have Phil, Phillip, Philly, and then
one person calls me PD.
That's it.
That sounds like you're a disease of some sort.
I've got PD.
See, I like Philly, like in Fivel.
What about you?
Oh, well, Meg.
Nobody calls me Megan.
Only my mom when I'm in trouble.
Meggy moo moo.
Wait.
What?
Yeah, Meggy moo moo.
That's my family's name for me.
Oh my god.
I hope that you gain a lot of weight.
And wear muumuus every day.
It was because I sang along.
I was supposed to be in bed.
I was hiding behind a couch.
Watching TV through a hole, in the cushions.
A little space, and an ice cream commercial came on,
and the cow would sing.
She would go, [SINGING] moo, moo.
And I sang along and got discovered in my hiding spot.
The couch is just mooing.
What about you?
Mine?
Now, Trish, Trisha, My family called us
by how we pronounced our own names when we were little.
Which for me was shish, or shisha.
So I get that a lot.
And that's kind of gone into shishy, shishkabob,
there's a lot of variation of that.
When I call my mom now, I'm like what's up mom?
It's the shish.
I like the shish because it sounds like a radio DJ.
It's the shish.
I dig it.
Do you have baby names for yourself?
No, just the Phil, Philly, that's it.
But you could call a girl your mom's name in the bedroom.
Yeah, but my mom also has a name that's not generally sexy,
I would say.
That' to me, also maybe it is the relationship thing.
Her name's Debbie.
Debbie's a funny one for that too.
Debbie, Deborah.
Deborah could be kinda sexy.
Well actually, that's interesting.
Because my step-mom and my aunt have the same name,
which is Rita.
So my dad, fine with it actually.
I just realized.
That's kind of a weird name to find two of.
I don't many Dustins, but a lot of Roberts.
And I'm sorry.
Not a lot of Lons or Kys.
Those are my two other brothers.
I could do it.
I think that it's just a name.
Also, if they look anything remotely similar.
OK that would freak me out.
Oh yeah, that freaks me out.
Let's see, we have-- fuck that one.
I'm putting it back in.
Belieze01 says, "Stupid people offended by cleavage."
Oh, annoying.
People are offended by cleavage?
That's what I was going to say.
I mean, really?
What's your life like?
I made a whole YouTube video about it.
[INTERPOSING VOICES]
My Boobs: A Rant, after the Assassin's Creed thing.
Because you were posting pictures.
And then you get the [INAUDIBLE].
It's what they call the boob window.
Which is actually a two piece-- it's
the hood just creates the boob window,
but people were very upset by my cleavage in that video.
So I made a video that was like, It's my boobs.
I'm going to do what I want with them.
Suck a dick.
I think that's a great response.
That's definitely a good way to go about it.
My thing Is always if I am doing something, or wearing
something, that I'm obviously showing off the goodies.
Then great.
Then appreciate them.
Don't be a dick about it.
If you don't want to appreciate, don't look.
I feel it's more of a girl on girl thing.
Because for guys-- for the most part,
I don't care if a girl is wearing a sports bra,
and she's holding them in.
Or if she's showing them off.
I think it's whatever.
So I think it is more of a girl on girl thing.
It's a lot of girl on girl.
Not 100 percent it's like 90 percent girl on girl.
But a lot of the guys are like, oh she's
only talking about-- people only care about her talking tech
cause her tits are out.
And, it's like no.
It doesn't make a difference.
I'm a human being.
It doesn't matter if they're in or out.
And frankly, I have to say, even when you hide them.
Oh Yeah.
Well when they're like Trisha's.
Even when you hide them Everyone's still like,
mmm dem titties.
And you're like, really?
I don't have that problem.
Because when I hide them people go--
like when I put out that picture this weekend.
People were like, I didn't even know you had boobs.
And I'm like--
Even me, though.
Was that a push up bra?
Absolutely.
Even me, though.
I have a picture--
It's not a crazy one, but it is one.
I have a picture in my modeling port
that it's just a swim suit that's not necessarily
pushing everything up and together.
And I've had people contact me, and be like,
oh this is obviously from before her boob job.
With that picture And I'm like, seriously?
To be fair, her boob job looks great.
People are going to think you're for real, though.
I'm not for real.
I've seen them.
They're fantastic and they're very real.
So for when I say it's the girl on girl thing, actually
I didn't even think about the guy's going oh, I
don't need to respect you.
You're doing this on purpose.
That is one of the that pisses me off.
Especially a female host.
I feel like you're damned if you do,
damned if you don't as a female host.
If you cover it up, they're like ugh she's so frumpy.
But if you try and look nice, ugh
she's banking off her looks.
Is there a perfect medium?
No
There's no way to win.
No one's ever happy.
Can you show a have cleave?
Just on one side.
It's one of those slant ways shirts that goes up like this.
So you get a little bit of one.
A little one.
What about side boob?
Is that classy?
I love side boob.
Don't host something with side boob showing.
I also love under boob.
I'm a huge fan under boob
I think under boob is very personal though.
I think it's very sexy, but I think that is private time.
Well that was like I showed-- we take a photo of my tattoo--
That is private time.
What?
OK, the photos with their arms in the air, so their shirt
comes up to just here.
It's hot.
It's super hot.
That is nakey-time activity.
You think so?
I don't know.
No one ever gets to see these puppies
unless it's a significant other.
No one gets to see these.
These, everyone.
This, nobody.
Top boob is PC.
Side boob is a little in the middle.
And under boob is very private.
I showed Trisha-- I took a photo of my tattoo
and Trisha was like, I love this.
The under boob is perfect.
Don't show it.
That's so ridiculous.
That's like if I have a preference of putting it
on the left or putting it on the right.
And it's like different times.
Listen, I've got my classy peen today.
OK.
The classy peen.
So you think just the nipple is private time part?
Everything else is fair game?
Yeah.
Oomph.
Well, OK-- I think--
It's not like you're walking down
the street holding your girls.
But if you're in Maxim.
I think there's a buffer area around the areola.
OK.
How big is the buffer area?
It depends on the nipple.
On the size of the nipple and the size of the boob.
And what you're covering them with.
Because if you're covering them with a sign,
you're covering them with hands, it's all different.
But you don't do that in public.
Well, no.
But we're talking about a magazine spread.
I'm saying you're out at a club and you
have a shirt that is like this and you
got some side boob rocking.
That's OK in public.
Yeah
Shirt that's like this and you got some under boob rocking.
Not OK.
I thought we were talking about photo shoots.
Well, it's a little more risque in a photo shoot.
But that's what you do.
That's what those photo shoots are.
If you've ever been on theCHIVE, it's
all sorts of underboob stuff.
That's great.
Let's all take a moment to remember what we've seen.
Today's Monday.
It's future lower back problems day.
I do want you to know that I have caught Steve twice--
It's the worst way you can describe it.
I caught Steve twice last week.
Just staring at that Jessica Negri GIF
of her doing that, where she's jiggling around.
Literally not even-- I'd look over and see it,
and then I'd look back over and he'd still be staring at it.
I'm like, she won't come back in here if you do that.
She's never going to come back, Steve.
I mean for swimsuits or whatever.
Side boob is more risque.
Nobody has underboob hanging out.
Well that is what I mean.
Underboob hanging out, that is private time.
Last thing before we do that.
Would you ever do a Playboy photo shoot?
Yes.
In general?
I would not.
You would not.
You're all about it.
Well, the giney.
I don't want to show the giney.
But the girls.
I'm crazy proud of the girls, so.
I would love to--
I feel like Playboy is the furthest
of the how naked are you?
It's not Penthouse or Hustle.
You're not spreading it out there for the world.
They're all on the same level for me.
Showing off the soul.
But would you go topless in a photo shoot?
No.
Really?
And I don't have a problem with people that choose to do it.
I just know for me, and Meg and I
have talked about this before.
I would be so uncomfortable that the pictures wouldn't come out
good any way.
Obviously, we're in Hollywood with lots
of friends in the entertainment industry.
I have a ton of friends that have done nudity
in some type of project.
And while it's fun to joke around,
you can see me naked for $2.99 OnDemand.
I never want to be able to say that.
Right.
I do wonder how it changes.
So how much is a Playboy magazine?
It costs me $2.83 to see me naked.
Here you go sir.
What do you think about-- topless naked
you would never-- what about if you're holding them?
See then, it's a little bit more--
But see, if you're going to save pride,
I think you're more FHM, Esquire.
That's why when it comes to the Playboy, hustler, whatever,
I consider them all the same.
I imagine it changes your relationship once your like,
so I've seen you naked.
But you guys have also seen Steve's balls.
I have a photo of it in my phone right now.
That's real life.
Let's just go to next question.
Oh, Steve's balls.
I think that's a good point, Trisha.
I feel in theory I'd be like, yeah
I'm super proud of the girls.
I'd love to show them off.
I don't know if I'd want everyone
to see them all the time.
Maybe just be implied is better-- Go ahead.
.
#nevergoingtohappenbut.
If Google shut down YouTube tonight, what would you do?
Look for a new job.
Oh man.
I would be very thankful that I put away a little nest egg.
Oh.
I'll be raiding Phil's nest egg.
Cause I need this.
Give me this now please.
I'd jump into the most ridiculous market out there
right now.
Which is, fuck, those social media experts.
Oh Yeah.
Because 95% of them are just fucking liars.
It's like, I know how to use Twitter.
Social media expert.
Oh no.
A lot of the jobs out there, they'll literally just
use bad services to get a bunch of people fake Twitter
followers.
And they're like, oh look at the percentages,
and I have a chart here.
Most of it is bullshit.
There are certain good people, like the people
that run Taco Bells, that they get it.
100% get it.
There are certain people that super get it.
A lot of people just don't get it.
I love when a brand Twitter knows how to use Twitter.
And they do it in a fun way.
I also like tweeting at brands when
I'm really fucking pissed off.
They've lost my bag.
Have the time I wonder if that's where
they got all the followers.
Because you always see American Airlines-- Lindsey
did a thing for American Airlines.
And they had 550,000, but they get no social traction
when they pimp something out.
So I was just like, the 500-- is that just people they
told to follow them just so they could DM them?
Probably.
Because that's a lot of complaints.
That's crazy.
If it got shut down I would be a travel agent, I think.
I've never been out of the country, besides Mexico once.
And there's all these things I want to do and see,
but it's always oh I can't get the time off work,
or oh I don't have the money saved up.
But if I was a travel agent, that
would be my work and my money.
I have sweaty hands.
I'm going to hold your cup.
You know that travel agents don't go anywhere, right?
They just book travel for other people.
No, they do go places.
Because they have to test it out and people
give them free vacations.
Yes they do!
I know people that do this for a living.
I know two separate people that do this for a living.
And they're always in Ireland, or Italy, or somewhere lovely.
Because this cruise line was like,
we're going to give 90% off.
So you can have all of your clients
come travel our cruise line.
Who is that person?
[INTERPOSING VOICES]
Hey!
Do you want to go on a cruise?
That's [INAUDIBLE] booking agent, duh.
You sound like Him from The Powerpuff Girls. "Hello,
Powerpuff Girls!"
I wouldn't trust anybody that talked like that ever.
That's all I've learned from this conversation.
Sounds like you were in a timeshare presentation
about being a travel agent.
They're like, it's so great.
You can go anywhere.
And they're like, hey!
No, I do!
That looked like boobies to me.
Hey boobies.
That's it for #TableTalk, guys.
Thanks for sending in your topics. #TableTalk
or on Reddit, r/sourcefed.
I'm Meg Turney.
I'm Phillip DeFranco.
I'm Trisha Hershberger.
Keep your underboob private, girls.
Keep that underboob to yourselves.
Bah-doop-boop.
Fucking terrible.
"Bah-doo-boop-boo-boo."
[MUSIC PLAYING]