Hey Dan here and if you are an ENFP or INFP I am willing to bet that one of the
things that can from time to time or perhaps all the time hold back your
progress is a difficulty dealing with problems it's falling into a destructive
mindset when something doesn't go your way. Now if you are new to the channel I
am an ENFP and I recently coughed up the 50 bucks for the StrengthsFinder 34
which is the test that shows your 34 strikes the one that is ranked 34th is
your absolute lowest my 34th so my biggest weakness really to look at it
that way is consistency despite what you may think by my general ability to post
each and every week here and my 33rd is what's called restorative which is your
ability to deal with problems problems like when you're traveling you're in
Ukraine and you just start recording a video in your Airbnb and realize there
is a brutal echo right now but the thing is is what can tend to happen and this
definitely happens to me by default is to fall into more of destructive
thinking or some kind of destructive pattern so for us the unity is when
things are going well when we're getting to use our extraverted intuition and do
lots of new things and go after our goals we're really excited and on the
ball and positive but the minute things start to go wrong when they're not going
our way it's really easy to fall into this destructive pattern and on the big
picture this is one of the things that can lead to enfps changing directions
all the time and having this sort of zigzag life where they're like yeah I
was doing that for two months and then that for three months and I can never
stay on the same thing for very long I just keep changing direction all the
time and I'll tell you why that happens and I'm also going to share a solution
to dealing with problems as well in this video so don't worry I'm not going to
leave you hanging one of the reasons this happens the zigzag approach and
feeling like after years of sort of trying to get somewhere you don't
actually get anywhere is that us enfps and our infp cuz
we love being comfortable we are not great with discomfort and when we hit a
home we deal with some kind of problem it makes us uncomfortable
and so what often happens is we start towards a goal we're like hey I want to
open an ice cream stand and we're really excited and when it comes to planning
the ice cream stand thinking about all the flavors all the different types of
ice cream we're going to sell we're really really excited when it comes to
designing our logo picking a name we're so excited
but then suddenly we find out we need to get a business license from the city to
sell ice cream ah there goes all that enthusiasm there goes all that energy
and rather than tough it out and go through that discomfort what can often
happen to us is we fall back and we feel uncomfortable we don't want to do that
and we say hey maybe that ice cream stand wasn't the best idea
maybe I'll go do something else maybe I'll go up in a cat cafe right turns out
even more licensing to have a cat cafe and we end up with this zig zag where we
feel like we've been busy for years we've been going after goals we've been
trying to do things and yet we don't really have anything accomplished we
haven't really done a lot right and ultimately what this comes down to is
not powering through and finishing up on what we start this is probably not a big
surprise to you one of the biggest issues I hear from fellow enfps and this
comes up with infps a lot as well is trouble following through trouble
finishing things trouble getting to the end of goals and actually reaching some
kind of success something that has really helped me with this and I was
actually just discussing it with a friend the other day which is what
reminded me of it to make this video is one phrase that I use when something
does not go my way and it's okay now what okay I need to get a city license
now what and then you look for the next solution rather than dwelling on the
problem that comes up just focus on okay what's next what's this solution what is
my next step you know it's really easy and I think natural when something
doesn't go our way to dwell on that right to get stuck on the pro
to think about what isn't working and then get stuck there and get into sort
of negative loops and sometimes expand on that even right use our imaginations
to think of all the bad things that couldn't happen the quickest and most
effective way to cut that off is just ask yourself so now what what do I do
next given the circumstance given the problem
the headache the trouble that I ran into now what do I do next to get me to that
goal so rather than letting yourself go off
and decide that hey the ice cream stand isn't for me think okay the ice cream
stand is still for me now what do I do do I go to a friend who loves paper work
maybe I have an aunt somewhere who's an accountant and loves filling out forms
do I go to her and ask for her help to get it done do I perhaps hire an expert
what do I do to get that done rather than reevaluating the end goal so the
next time something isn't going your way I want you to go through this process
step one is acceptance so hey this is true this is happening this is the
situation now step two is reaffirming what you still want and then step three
is asking that question so now what and then coming up with a new plan if you
don't accept your current circumstance then you're gonna get stuck in this
cycle as well if you don't really read goal then you're gonna fall into that
ENFP trap of changing your destination when something isn't going your way so
that's really important to reaffirm and refocus on your bigger goal that will
give you that excitement again to build that ice cream stand you really want
remind yourself of the goal and why you were doing it then ask that question so
now what can I do so now what then come up with your alternative plan then
follow that plan and that is going to I serious shave years off the time frame
to reach your goals it's going to eliminate the zigzag as well as that
wasted time we can spend I can remember times in my life wasting weeks dwelling
in some kind of a negative pattern when something wasn't going my way and that
is not what I want for you so go through these four steps accept your
circumstance figure out or reaffirm I should say
figure out reaffirm what you really want do not figure it out stick to the same
thing you wanted ask yourself so now what come up with your next steps and
then take action if you follow this I'm telling you things will go a lot better
when it comes to dealing with problems and reaching your goals if you are new
to the channel my name is Dan this is dreams around the world and my mission
here is to help you become the best version of yourself all while creating
the most awesome life possible for you and those you love
so do consider hitting subscribe button hitting the bell and I will catch you in
the next video soon. Bye for now!