- Hello everyone.
Firstly, a really big thank you from myself
and everyone here at the Sorted Team,
to those of you who joined us
for our Sorted Live Big Christmas Bash.
Whether that was in person in the theater
or the thousands of you around the world globally,
you brought such phenomenal energy to the show
and it made the whole experience absolutely incredible.
None of which would've been possible
without the amazing team working behind the scenes,
so, we will be eternally grateful to them.
Thank you.
But we also appreciate right now, times are tough.
So, if you couldn't make it to the show,
we've put together the following highlights video,
with some of the best bits.
Merry Christmas.
- [Announcer] Ladies and gentlemen,
please welcome to the stage, Sorted Food!
(jaunty Christmas music)
(audience cheering)
(Christmas music continues)
- Come on! - Yes, yes, yes, yes!
(hosts laughing) (audience applauding)
- Hello and welcome to Sorted's Big Christmas Bash Live.
(hosts cheering)
(audience applauding)
- Everybody up top, give us a wave.
- Hello! - Yeah!
- [Barry] And down here, give us a wave.
- Hello. - Wow.
- [Barry] And behind us, you guys.
- [Ebbers] Hello.
- [Barry] You have no idea what you've looked-
you're in for tonight.
(upbeat music)
- Just to remind you,
there is a reason we haven't played this for a decade.
It's horrific.
- It's not great, but for those
of you who don't know, this is how it works.
I'm gonna ask a series of multiple choice questions
about global Christmas traditions,
and every wrong answer, you add something into the eggnog
- Which is older Shoreditch Town Hall,
or the first written record of pigs in blankets?
Is it pigs in blankets?
Shoreditch town hall?
Or is it the same year?
- No way. - Oh, no.
- A, B or C?
Barry!
Turn your board round in 3, 2, 1!
- B. - A.
- Pig in a blanket. (audience laughing)
- Pig in a blanket, pig in a blanket, Shoreditch Town Hall.
The answer is Shoreditch Town Hall.
- Ha ha ha.
- We have some pigs in blankets.
(audience laughing) - Oh yes!
- [Barry] No, no, no, no, come on, yes.
- [Ebbers] What do you reckon, two?
Pop, two in, and then pass 'em along.
- Just me and you? - Just me and you.
- What do you think, three? - Man what's wrong with-
take it, let's go for it.
- [Jay] No, he said two.
(audience laughing) - Just go for it.
- Just a couple.
Barry, this is delicious dried fish.
(audience laughing)
Right, ready?
Blend in 3, 2, 1.
(blenders whirring) (chickens clucking)
- [Barry] Got it, you've got it.
- [Ebbers] Got on Jay, go on Jay.
Yes, Jay, no! (audience laughing)
(pensive music)
- And swallow. - Oh, not bad, not bad.
(audience laughing) - Well done, well done.
(audience applauding)
- Go on, go on, go on. (glass clinks)
- Oh, too easy. - Yeah.
- [Audience] Barry! Barry! Barry! Barry! Barry!
- [Jay] Come on! (audience laughing)
- [Audience] Barry! Barry! Barry!
(audience laughing)
(energetic music)
- Number one, thanks for the distraction,
as we set out a cooking demo, we love a challenge at Sorted.
So, when they say, you know,
one or two or three or four recipes, that's never enough,
with our normals, what they're after,
if we can get power to the hob,
(audience chuckling)
is 10 recipes in 10 minutes.
Yes, that was my reaction,
quite literally against the clock.
- 3, 2, 1, sprout. (whistle tweets)
- Okay, my favorite way of cooking sprouts is to roast them.
They give a wonderful, nutty color and taste and flavor.
So, season them, oil, salt, pepper.
What is better than roasting in 2022?
- Deep frying! - Air frying.
- Put it in the title and the tags,
everyone watches the video, so there we go.
Next up, I'm doing a sprout gratin.
I've covered it in bechamel sauce and grated cheese.
Now when you do grated cheese added to bechamel,
you get a sauce called a?
- Mornay? - Mornay. Yes, I heard it.
Great, we got the foodie crowd in excellent.
A little bit of caraway seed,
a little bit of seasoning, and a breadcrumb top.
The breadcrumbs will go lovely and Christmasy, crispy!
But given it's Christmas, I want them Christmasy.
This is a panettone loaf.
I only need the breadcrumbs,
so we're just gonna scatter those over like that.
(audience laughing)
- Ebbers you are doing an amazing job.
- [Hosts And Audience] Ebbers! Ebbers! Ebbers! Ebbers!
(audience clapping along)
(jaunty music)
- [Announcer] What's Kush put in my bouche?
(Mike laughing) - Stop it!
(audience laughing)
- Christmas is the real celebration.
Wait. Okay, so guessing is, is part of all the senses,
so before it goes in your mouth, just-
- Where are you? Where are you?
- There! (audience laughing)
Okay, 80% aroma.
- I'm getting- - Ready? It's going in!
(audience laughing)
Sorry. (laughing)
(audience laughing)
(Jay mumbling)
Right, right, right, what? What is it?
What flavors?
Talk to me, flavors.
Flavors.
- I can't swallow it. (audience laughing)
- You can, you can!
- [Ebbers] Like I said, our Head Elf is quite mischievous.
- [Mike] Well, well, what do you think it is?
- I can't- - Is it animal, vegetable?
- Fish. - Yes.
- Shellfish. Sea, sea, in the sea.
- Yep. Yep, in the sea.
- [Ebbers] I need you to lock in something.
- There's two things. - Right. You've got this
- Has Kush put prawn cocktail in my bouche?
(buzzer buzzes)
- Take the blindfold off and have a look.
- Is that a no? - It is a no.
- What? Prawn cocktail would taste better
than your reaction, surely?
- Not if it's all-in-one.
- That was caviar mixed with an oyster mousse,
garnished with a little bit of Tabasco sauce,
which sometimes you might have with an oyster.
- [Jay] How much have we spent on this show? Caviar?
(camera whooshes)
- Why should you never give Elsa a balloon?
Because she'll let it go.
(drum sting plays) ♪ Let it go ♪
- No, that's just pandering.
That is total pandering. (laughing)
- Why is it always so cold during Christmas?
- Because it's Decem-burr.
(drum sting plays) (audience laughing)
- Come on, round of applause for that.
Okay, who's horny, has a red nose
and pulls old men at Christmas?
- Oh, it's Janice.
- It's Janice. (light whirs off)
(theatre lights click off)
- [Janice] Oh dear, oh dear.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(audience applauding)
(dramatic music continues)
(audience cheering)
Yes, my name is Janice
and I provide all of the voiceovers for the show.
You'll know my classic catchphrases, such as,
"Oh dear, oh dear."
"Check the fridge." (audience laughing)
and "What earth you playing at your incompetent twerp,
you're supposed to be a qualified chef!"
(audience laughing)
This is an official pardon from the Mayor of Valencia.
(audience cheering and applauding)
It's for that terrible paella burrito that you made,
the time you started a Twitter war.
There you go.
(upbeat music)
- Janice has hacked into your iCloud
and found your charity naked Christmas card shoot.
- No!
- Remember that day at the office?
Yep, we certainly do.
If you fail tonight's "Pass It On",
we'll be releasing the image online for the world to see.
Merry Christmas.
- Let's behead Colin.
(audience laughing)
And I've really, I'm really worried
about what else can I do?
I could do, should I try?
Should I try and do a cake?
100g, 100g, 100g sponge?
It's a no? (audience disagreeing)
I say yes!
- There's, cool that down,
and turn it into like a Rocky-Roady sort of thingy?
(audience agreeing)
(laughing excitedly) Yes! Okay, right.
- Yes! Chef S.O.S! - Ring that bell!
(bell ringing)
(dramatic music) (audience cheering)
- Yes!
(audience laughing)
(audience laughing) Good Kush!
- The best Kush.
- 77% of the online audience would like
to hear you talk about your allotment.
(audience laughing)
- I can understand why.
5, 4, 3, 2, 1, stop cooking!
(horn honks) (audience applauding)
- I don't even think that deserves a round of applause.
- The results are in the online audience have said fail.
- [All] No! (glass breaking)
- Okay, this is gonna be burnt into your retinas
for a long, long time, so if you want to turn away,
please do so, but Will?
Please reveal the naked Christmas card.
(record scratches)
(hosts yelling) - Oh no!
(Christmas music) (audience cheering)
- So, if you are an absolute nutter
or just want an excuse to donate
to Crisis at Christmas this year,
then we'll make this festive abomination,
un-pixelated, you have been warned,
Christmas card available to download using the link below,
and in turn you will be donating
to a great charity this Christmas.
Plus, if over the Christmas period you'd like
to sit down and enjoy either
of the live streams in their entirety as live,
then we have now made both of those available to buy.
Again, the links are downstairs,
but from all of us at Sorted,
all we wish you a very happy, and safe, festive period.
Merry Christmas.