The only ways the no contact rule will fail. The no contact rule can and will fail if you're
not careful for the following reasons I will reveal in this video. Welcome to The SCG Show!
This video is officially sponsored by BetterHelp, get 10% off your first month in the description
down below. The no contact rule is a strategy often used after a breakup, where an individual
cuts off all communication with their EX for a certain period of time. For the sake of this
video I'll be focusing on how this rule can and will fail when you want to move on from
a toxic relationship and person. You will never be good enough for the wrong person... if you've
decided to walk away or mutually agree to split up with the wrong person, the no contact
rule can be an excellent tool to have in your Arsenal. The reason why that is and can be
the case is because it gives you a better chance of moving on and not going back. I mean
I used to be in a toxic relationship with the wrong person, we split up twice over the
course of several years... both times my decision by being tipped too far... but the first time
I walked away, I did so with the wrong intentions. I went no contact but not in the proper way,
because I was weak, naive and immature... this resulted in the no contact rule failing spectacularly
and me actually going back into the arms of the wrong person, wasting more years of my
precious life in a relationship that was toxic and got progressively worse. The second and
final time I walked away however I implemented the no contact rule once again... but this time
it didn't fail because I stood my ground. I stayed strong, I kept firm boundaries, I never
wanted to go back, never wanted to speak and I wanted to move on. I concluded that anybody
can use the no contact rule if they wish to be without the wrong person in their lives
anymore... however it can fail if you're doing it for the wrong reasons and with the wrong
motivations... let me explain how it can fail! Please don't forget to Subscribe and hit the
Bell notification so you never miss any of my videos! If you're using the no contact rule
solely to manipulate your ex into coming back or changing their behavior... it might backfire
The rule should be used as a tool for personal growth and healing, not as a way to control
someone's feelings or actions... especially if they're toxic. Arthur walked away from a toxic
relationship from an entitled spoilt brat of a girlfriend.... she caused drama, consistent problems,
was chaotic and so rude... he had enough after she interfered with his work, causing an unnecessary
argument and decided to do the no contact rule. But whilst doing so he never intended
to break up, just hopefully get her to see the light and how she was behaving bad. He
thought "This will show her... she'll see how bad she is... she'll finally get it." After a few
days & weeks of being starved of attention his now ex would reach out via text with the
same old sob story = "I get it now! I was out of line! I know where I went wrong! I'm sorry
baby! Take me back" and in a moment of weakness Arthur would get triggered and believe the
promises only to repeat the toxic relationship cycle all over again, with the same old arguments,
problems and issues and therefore he'd be pushed again over the edge and go no contact
for a few weeks.... only to get a similar message saying "I'm sorry baby! I shouldn't have done
what I did! I promise it will be different this time!" The fact is and the truth is with
a toxic person it will never be different the second time round... you will never be good
enough for the wrong person. So this is all about unrealistic expectations, if you are
you using the no contact rule to get a difficult toxic person to change their ways, to become
a saint, to become a good person... then I'm sorry you need to think again... it's never going to
happen! If you're getting value from this video please hit the like button for the YouTube
algorithm and support my channel by becoming an official member! The link for memberships
is in the description down below. The no contact rule will fail if you don't stick to it consistently...
breaking the rule by reaching out to your ex or responding to them will only prolong
your healing process and make you confused and it's a complete waste of your time. Megan
was dating a guy who was not a right match for her, he was childish, rude, selfish, inconsistent,
a user, a liar and he cheated on her. When tipped over the edge Megan would announce she's walking
away, she'd text and call everyone in her phone book with the news "it's over between us! I
finally left him! We're officially done!" She'd go ahead and delete his number, maybe block
him for a bit, and celebrate the freedom and joy for being so brave... but only for a short
period of time... then she'd get cold feet, anxious in a moment of weakness and put his number
back into her phone and send messages like "How are you? Are you coping okay? Should we
talk??" Of course the ex would respond and they'd meet up, jump into bed together to once again
repeat the same toxic relationship cycle. Then a few weeks later she'd announce to everyone
once again she was leaving him, then go back again, then break up again, then go back again
and so on and so forth. Insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and somehow expecting
different results. Learn from my personal mistake and Megan's and that is to stick to your decision
once it is over it really is over! You should never speak to them again, you should never
contact them again... because once you do speak to them and contact them there's a very high
chance you're going to see them and then you're going to sleep with them and be with them
again.... what is the point in that? Thank you to BetterHelp for sponsoring this video. I've
personally used BetterHelp and found it to be so effective for turning my life around
for the better. BetterHelp is therapy online which offers weekly sessions via phone video
and live chat. You get matched with a therapist according to where you are, what you're looking
for and what you need help with... if it's not a great fit you can switch therapists easily.
Therapy is a great way to take care of ourselves mentally, just like we try to do so physically
through diet and exercise. Online therapy can teach you valuable life coping skills and
support you amazingly when tough times occur. So click the link below or visit betterhelp.com/scgshow
for 10% off your first month of online therapy today... go ahead and
take that first step to turning your life around with BetterHelp! The no contact rule
requires time for both parties to heal and gain perspective, because if you end the rule
too soon you may not have allowed enough time for the necessary healing and growth. This
is a dangerous game to play and it can get you badly burnt if you don't allow yourself
that necessary time you need. Remember how I said I walked away twice from a previous
toxic relationship? The first time I did was in January a cold miserable time. I lost my
business around that time as well, Valentine's Day was shortly after, there were plenty of
triggers and moments where I was feeling lost dazed and depressed and alone. Had I gone just
one more month of no contact I would have been free... instead I didn't give myself time
I never forced myself to look inwardly and ask bigger questions and instead I reached
out and allowed her to reach out to me, we then got back together for more years of misery
in the relationship which was a waste of time. In contrast let me give you the timeline of
the second time I walked away= I walked away in late 2019 went no contact and so on... it
was the pandemic, shortly after my father died in early 2020 as well, and I isolated for most
of that year alone. There were plenty of triggers and moments alone, where I could have done
with any form of contact, but I stood strong, I never reached out, I never responded to any
attempt of contact. I didn't want to know... I needed plenty of months to process everything
and to understand all that occurred, and just when I was turning a corner the pandemic happened
and then my father died... but that's life... these things happen... Time is very important to the
no contact rule! The longer you go, each day you pass, I'm telling you now... the easier it
can get. If the issues that led to the breakup and not addressedand resolvedm the no contact rule may be unsuccessful
in rebuilding any possible chance of a healthy relationship. Both parties need to be willing
to work on the problems and find solutions for a successful reconciliation, but I believe
firmly good couples and even those who have serious problems if they're meant to be they
don't break up... they stick together... they get better, they heal together and thrive together
Learn from me = I assumed foolishly I used to be the problem in that toxic relationship
especially the first time I walked away. I thought things would be better the second
time around, especially after no contact, especially after space and time apart... but I was wrong,
dead wrong... the issues were still there, the problem's worse. Toxic people never change,
they don't have the capacity to do so nor do they have the motivation... if the issues
are unresolved and if the person is toxic, the no contact rule will fail, because these
people will never change.. but also it is not your responsibility nor is it your life purpose
or job to do so!