Welcome to Spirit Airlines! We know you have a lot of options-
We know you have a lot of options, so thank you for paying five dollars to fly with Spirit.
It's time to get you ready for takeoff.
Before we depart we have a few important safety instructions. First things first,
fasten your seat belt. - Excuse me,
it seems like I might be missing my seatbelt. - Most of our seats come equipped with a seat
belt. If your seat doesn't have one, feel free to purchase shoelaces from your flight attendant.
Tie it around yourself and hope for the best.
Once we reach the cruising altitude of 35,000 feet, we will offer complimentary refreshments.
Peanut? I'm sorry only one per customer if you would like to purchase a bag they're
available to purchase for $27.99. - Well I am pretty hungry so-
- I'm sorry we don't accept any major credit cards, we do accept
Bank of 711 debit cards and cash. - Well I don't have any cash-
- I bank with 7 11. I'll take a vodka. - Our premier drink service does not
carry any vodka, however we do have a vodka-like substance that serves about the same purpose.
Your comfort is very important- - My husband needs one too
Might as well leave two more! - God I love
you! - I love you baby!
Our seats recline up to half an inch. - Um mine doesn't seem to be working.
- Comfort is very important to us, please remember
to return your seats to the upright position for takeoff and landing.
U.S. law prohibits smoking at all times,
however vaping is encouraged on all Spirit Airlines flights.
Would you two mind? - You don't
talk to my husband like that! - I love my wife and I don't care who knows it!
Oh my god.
Two more vodkas!
Take a moment to locate the emergency exit nearest to you. In the case of a water landing, it will be
every man for himself so take note of what and who may be standing in your way.
You two are disgusting! I can hear the exchange of saliva.
You're just jealous!
I can assure you, I'm not.
Hey you don't talk to my husband like that!
I flew Spirit Airlines for the luxury, you're ruining my vacation!
Come here baby!
Oh no!
Your seat cushion may serve as a flotation device, if you're lucky.
Pool noodles are available to purchase and store under the seat in front of you for a small fee of $65.99.
Can you two just please keep your hands to yourselves?
You don't know love like we do.
Your breath smells like tuna.
Her breath smells like sexy!
Yes!
[moaning and groaning]
All Spirit Airlines pilots have completed at least one flight in an airplane or similar vehicle.
Sorry, similar vehicle? What does that mean?
Yeah wait, what?
I love my wife!
I gotta get out of here!
[screaming, yelling]
Spirit Airlines, we'll get you where you need to go.
Probably.