'Are you talking to me?'
Welcome back to my Dark Corner of this Sick World.
‘One false move and I’ll cut it off.’
Begun in 1984 by John Rad – a pseudonym for Iranian filmmaker, apologies for pronunciation, Jahangir Salehi Yenganehrad –
Dangerous Men was shot off and on over the next 20 years.
‘I hear what you’re saying but I still can’t believe it’
Which explains why I can’t tell you the plot, just what happens.
‘We’re serious. We’re dead serious’
It’s not so much that Dangerous Men is bad, it’s that it lacks even the most basic competence,
to the extent that unless characters are speaking, the background sound cuts out.
‘I love you so much sometimes it scare me.’
This is Mina and Daniel and we cut from their date to a convenience store robbery.
- 'Son of a bitch, you're robbing my shop.' - 'Shut the f@(£ up.'
I’ll just put this somewhere safe,
Which serves no purpose except to establish Daniel’s brother as a cop.
‘Freeze police!’
Who doesn’t let anyone else speak on the phone.
- 'I'll stay through the convention Daniel.' - I…
- 'I'm supposed to speak again Friday.' - If I….
- I'Il be back earlier next week?' - Could I just.
- 'I'll tell you what.' - Let me speak!
But Mina and Daniel’s happiness is short lived.
‘Well buddy, I think our luck is just about to change.’
I’ve been jonesing to assault someone all day.
The bikers chase the couple.
- 'I'm scared.' - ‘It’s too late to run.’
Yeah these guys look like sprinters to me.
As Mina is attacked, Daniel kills the other biker, but his friend takes revenge.
#synth music#
Music really setting the tone here.
‘You killed my only friend.’
Maybe ask yourself why you just had one.
Now the music changes to something more appropriate.
#love ballad music#
Ludicrous is pretty appropriate for what happens next.
‘Hey Tiger, why don’t you take me with you?’
I feel like I’d be suspicious, but Mina’s very convincing.
‘You really turn me on.’
Yep, those are words people say.
‘Sweet as a piece of cake.’
Obviously Mina’s going to take revenge.
‘I want you to rub my knees lightly.’
Somehow. But where could she hide a weapon?
Join us on Patreon if you want to know, because Youtube won't let us show that.
‘From now on, all trash like you is going to end up dead, no matter what I have to do or what I have to lose.’
So the first twenty minutes is Mina’s origin story as a vengeful killer of abusive men.
Okay; there’s a plan.
Which is more than Mina had for her escape.
She hitches a ride. But…
as she dreams of a wicker furniture showroom... the driver has dreams of his own.
‘Why should I pass up this kind of opportunity.’
Bad day.
- 'No.' - ‘I’m going to have some fun with you.’
But an immediate opportunity to put her new life purpose into practice and she decides to stick with what works.
‘I’ve always been attracted to older men.’
Men are dumb.
'Hit the road. Fast.'
Mina drives off and we get to spend another six minutes with the naked man,
even though he never appears again.
‘I never finish anything I start’
Intent on punishing the right men, Mina takes an admirably systematic approach, hiring a prostitute,
‘Why are you taking your clothes off?’
'Don't you want me to?'ck before
to conduct some vigilante market research.
‘I want to be one of the girls of the night, but I don’t know anything about it.’
Before setting to work.
Alongside soulful trips to the beach.
Can’t read that but fortunately there’s a song.
#Spenders of the moment.#
The beach is a triggering location.
‘This is for you. I made it myself from sea shells.’
What do you say when your fiancée gets you a shell owl diorama?
‘Beautiful’
But now...
‘What a time to run out of gas.’
That’s what I say when I run out of gas.
Forced to hitchhike again,
‘We’ll have a little fun then I’ll take you where you need to go.’
She has the worst luck,
'Absolutely.' #Gun shot#
and her killing spree continues,
focussed on places with a single strong light source.
But then…
‘It is believed that all the crimes are committed by a lone assailant, there is a high probability the assailant is a woman.’
‘Oh my God!’
They’re investigating the murders?
Meanwhile cop David gets an update on his dead brother,
learning that his sister in law is now a suspect from a classic Dark Corners breakout character, Captain Inappropriate Segue.
‘That doesn’t mean she’s a serial killer’a
‘I hope you’re right, but anyway, what are we talking about, you’re supposed to be on vacation.’
David kicks back.
‘Another beer.’
Why not finish that one?
But he’s also here for information cos this is a biker bar.
‘Hey man check out that bitch, she’s fine. I’m gonna bang that’
‘I hear you bro.’
Sometimes it’s almost too real.
Bald biker follows the girl through the bar’s magic portal.
Wow, Narnia’s changed.
David goes after them, looking for information but finding....
He saves the girl, but forgets to ask any questions, so still needs information
and the girl agrees to act as bait, for that same biker,
again, nothing suspicious here,
‘Well, look what I've got here.’
while David lies in wait in the car.
'Don't we have some unfinished business.'
Of all the ways I thought this could backfire his foot getting stuck was not one of them.
Finally he springs out with his trademark catchphrase.
‘Hey dirtbag, don’t be so sure’
Well, this is just the beach scene repeated.
No one could say this film underplays the dangers women face
– on average we get a sexual assault every 13 minutes –
I do feel it underplays the effect on the victim.
‘It worked, just like you said it would.’
Getting assaulted twice in one day makes me hot.
Now, Mina is arrested.
‘I’m a police detective, you’re under arrest, You have the right to remain silent.’
a right she exercises, we never see her again.
- ‘By the way, Mina’s been arrested’ - ‘She okay?’ - ‘Yeah, she’s alright.’b
Facing murder charges but other than that.
Weirdly, David hasn’t been trying to help Mina, he’s been tracking down the son of the biker his brother killed,
another biker with a bad ass name.
‘Where can I find Black Pepper’
In the spice aisle! But don’t tell him I told you.
It’s so late in the day to introduce a new character,
but I’m guessing this was shot at least ten years after the stuff with Mina.
Also no idea why David is after the son of the man his brother killed.
Anyway after a fight..
in which every punch sounds the same,
# Imagine someone button mashing the punch button on Mortal Combat#
Giving the impression of a video game.
#Faster button mashing where the previous sound effect doesn't have time to finish before the next one starts.#
David too is out the plot!
Leaving his elderly boss as our new lead.
‘Send a helicopter and an ambulance to hidden canyon road.’
We’re trying chief! We can’t find it!
Black Pepper takes refuge in the house of a blind girl.
'Who's there?'
Not sure why she is armed.
Let's go over to Dark Corners quilting advsor, Cameraman's mum, are quilters usually packing heat?
'I know I do.'
And the film ends on a misspoken line.
‘Anything you say will be held against you’
Any other film I’d say that was satire.
'Get out of here.'
Thanks for watching. For much more on this, join us on Patreon.
This is a dreadful film but he made it – what have you done?
– what other stubborn filmmakers do you grudgingly have to applaud? Let us know in the comments below.
'I'll be back before you know it.'