Deep-rooted idealism, similar to many of the other INFJ traits, come as both a blessing
and a curse. With such a vivid imagination and creative mind, this personality type can’t help
but to see the world through an idealistic lens. However, despite the beauty this ability brings,
there’s certainly a few obstacles and challenges it pushes the INFJ to overcome.
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Alright, let’s get right into it, starting with..
Number 1: Personal development is always on their mind
You may be asking, “What’s the problem with continuous self-betterment?” And to that, we say,
it’s not a problem if it’s balanced correctly. For the INFJ, however, self-improvement is not
a side thought, but rather, the main event in their lives. For most INFJs,
the thoughts and actions taken for the sake of self-improvement puts a lot of pressure on them,
sometimes to the point of sabotaging their own happiness. Instead of passively improving
oneself and doing the best they can to remain on the healthier and motivated side of things,
the INFJ’s idealistic outlook and self-observation leads them to continuously pick apart every aspect
of their being. Looks, habits, money, personality, self-development, social life, spirituality,
and the list goes on, INFJs can’t help but be better and do better in every sense of the matter,
even if that means giving up what they enjoy. In fact, INFJs can justify pretty much anything
in the name of personal development, and that can become toxic overtime.
Number 2: Being seen as a rebellious trouble-maker
Ask any INFJ and they’ll tell you, although they don’t necessarily care what others think of them,
they strive to come off as a kind and capable individual. They prefer not to ruffle any
feathers, and will sometimes even put their own preferences aside in order to avoid conflict and
confrontation. Then there are the times when their idealism says otherwise. Sometimes this
idealist temperament every INFJ has, leads them to break certain rules and regulations.
With such a vivid view of how some things should be, or how some processes should go,
INFJs may justify some of their rebellious actions for the sake of their idealism.
It’s not exactly their way or the highway, but rather, an experiment of just how accurate their
envisioned outcome plays out when they go with their own idealistic route compared to the route
that’s in place. Luckily, due to their empathy, optimism and deep understanding of the world,
these idealisms are the by-product of their good-nature. An example of this
is rooted in the INFJ’s non-conformity. Known as one of the INFJ trailblazers,
Martin Luther King’s movement is a prime example of this non-conformist rebellion, and his speech
“I Have a Dream” provides a close look into a true INFJ’s idealistic view on the world.
Number 3: It makes them seem like they’re not in touch with reality
It’s no secret that this introverted intuitive type would prefer to spend time processing their
thoughts and wallowing in their imagination than socializing with their external world.
And with that, they’re often seen as the dreamer type, with two feet on the ground,
but their head in the clouds. However, despite their introverted intuition and thinking playing
a huge role in this dreamer persona, it’s actually their idealistic perception that
makes others think that maybe the INFJ isn’t as grounded as they lead onto. This idealism,
especially when expressed to others in an optimistic way, can make INFJs seem
like they can’t grasp the harsher aspects of reality. It makes them seem as if they see
the world through fantasy-blinders, deeming them naive and immature. It’s as if that,
because they truly have a probable solution to nearly all of the world’s problems,
that in the INFJ’s world, these problems don’t exist. Of course, the actuality of the matter is
that these problems are not only very apparent to the INFJ, but they can be considered so apparent
that they haunt the INFJ, leaving them no choice but to try their best to process a solution.
Number 4: High standards makes accepting what is, very difficult
Holding high standards for yourself and others is known to be a sign of self respect and confidence.
Knowing your value and capabilities allows you to motivate yourself to try new things while also
setting standards for who you allow into your life. For the INFJ type, these are all true,
and without their idealistic standards, they wouldn’t be able to achieve certain milestones
and connections in their life. Yet, on the other side of things, it’s this very idealistic outlook
that also makes it difficult to live in the moment and simply accept things as they come.
Whether it be a new potential friendship, a job position, a living circumstance, a new experience,
or the results of their hard work, the INFJ brain can’t help but to think of all the ways something
could have been, or should be, better. Despite their non-judgemental attitude, INFJs can see the
potential of people and situations, and with that, they can easily see just how those people and
situations aren’t living up to that potential. Not only is this extremely frustrating for the INFJ
themselves, but it also places a certain amount of pressure on the people around them to live up to
this vision the INFJ has for them. For the INFJ, rarely do things exceed their expectations, often
leading them to have to settle for the mundanity they’ve created through their perception.
Number 5: They get used to the feeling of being disappointed
Speaking of nothing ever really being good enough, INFJ idealism is the source of their
seemingly never-ending disappointments in life. Sure, they have the optimism and creativity to
envision a better way, but the reality of things is often what wins in the end. In this world,
things aren’t perfect, ideal or even fair most times. And with their ability to see
the potential for things to be perfect, ideal and fair, as well as the creative route it takes to
achieve that, this harsh reality can be extremely disappointing for the INFJ type. When it comes to
certain friendships and relationships, it’s this envisioned potential that keeps the INFJ around,
hoping that one day they will witness a different version of those they hold onto. They tend to
idolize those they meet, preferring to see the best in them and remain blinded to the reality
of their negative habits and traits. Yet, when the truth sets in and becomes impossible to look past,
disappointment after disappointment often leads the INFJ to throw in the towel.
Number 6: They never celebrate their wins
As we said, the INFJ’s idealism makes disappointments seem like an everyday
experience. So, what happens when the INFJ actually does achieve something
they’ve worked so hard for? Well, with such perfectionism at hand, reaching those milestones,
achievements and wins in life that people normally pride themselves on just don’t do the
same for the INFJ. Even if the INFJ doesn’t criticize how they could have done better,
or analyze where they went wrong, despite coming out on top, it doesn't take long for the INFJ
to begin ruminating about the next steps. They don’t take the time to stop to celebrate their
hard-earned accomplishments and even external validation only goes so far. Their idealism
makes it seem as if these achievements are simply the bare minimum results of their capabilities,
like an obvious outcome to all their hard work. They’re not surprised when they achieve things
due to their past idealistic visions, and so, they don’t spend much time thinking about it.
And lastly,
Number 7: Finding a fitting career is nearly impossible
Through the idealistic eyes of the INFJ, finding an appropriate career path is one
of the most challenging journeys. As we said, INFJs tend to settle for things in life as a
result of their understanding that there’s a big contrast to their idealistic hopes and the
reality of the world. One difficult example of this is finding a path in life that both suits
and sustains them. Marching to the beat of their own drum, it’s not uncommon for the INFJ to step
outside of the societal norm when it comes to career paths, in order to build something of
their own. They have dreams and creative visions that are rooted in their idealistic nature. Dreams
of a career that helps others and solves the world’s problems while also providing them
the adventurous and balanced life they long for. Some INFJs chase these dreams and the results are
everything they ever hoped for. Others achieve them, only to find that it’s not as ideal as
they envisioned. And most tend to settle for that job that goes against every idealistic view they
have because life simply got the best of them. Of course, it’s never too late to follow any
sort of idealistic dream, as long as there’s a touch of logic and realism to back it up.
Well PSYCH-Os, that’s it for today.. So, what would you say is your biggest struggle when it
comes to being an idealist INFJ? Let us know in the comments below! Also, make sure to leave us
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