If you’ve ever dealt with a passive aggressive bully before then you may already have experience with narcissists.
If not, they are people who tend to see other people as things rather as actual human beings, and who want their needs and desires to be met at all times.
These people have a tendency to latch on to others, sucking them of their energy and making them do task after task for them.
Luckily, there are some ways to get back at a narcissist and finally strike back for everything they’ve put you through.
Stick around until point number 1 and you’ll know how to cut down any narcissist before they even get a chance to sink their teeth into you.
Number 10: Don’t apologize for yourself.
Narcissists tend to seek out those who have a lot of empathy.
To most people, these are considered caring and well-intentioned individuals,
but to a narcissist, they represent a type of person who will do things for them.
A narcissist may pretend like they care, but ultimately they wouldn’t really be bothered if their actions ruined your day, and they will never feel guilty when asking for more.
It will make a narcissist miserable, then, if you can become a person who doesn’t back down easily, and doesn’t apologize for things outside of their control.
You can still be accountable to yourself and you can still apologize when you feel you should, but you should never take responsibility or cover for a narcissist, especially if they are asking you to.
Number 9: Pit them against themselves.
Narcissists do their best in superficial settings, and they always want to be the center of attention.
In more serious moments, they won’t withdraw, but will instead try to make themselves seem like they are really hurt or affected by whatever is going on.
This act can often go undetected by the less receptive individuals around you, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be pointed out to them.
If you feel like a person is trying to take credit for something, or appear more sad or hurt than they actually are, you can always try to poke around the subject to draw attention there.
The best part of this strategy is that narcissists will almost always walk right into the trap, since they want to be able to brag or reclaim the spotlight.
Getting a narcissist to talk about a subject with depth is always going to work out in your favor, and it should help shed some light on what that person is really like without making you get your hands dirty.
Number 8: Check them without overplaying your hand.
If you really want to know how to completely destroy a narcissist, then you are going to have to know how to poke their buttons.
A narcissist is always going to seek control, and they are both at their strongest as well as their most vulnerable when in a group setting.
If you are dealing with a narcissist in a group of friends, you may want to start putting up your walls whenever they try to get close.
While a narcissist doesn’t want to open up to you, they will always want their friends and co-workers to open up to them.
This gives them leverage, as well as something to potentially discuss with others in an effort to gain social clout.
If you feel like a person is trying to dig into your personal life, stopping them right away is a really good way to make things clear on where you stand.
The narcissist will know that you saw through their scheme, which will make them weary of you, but they won’t be able to do anything about it.
If the narcissist continues bothering you after this, then you can continue to push them back to square one time and time again.
They will become frustrated and probably overplay their hand, while you can capitalize on the situation without having to pay it much mind.
Number 7: If they upset you, don’t let them know.
A narcissist isn’t a person who cares when they upset someone, as most truly believe that they matter more and are always in the right.
If for whatever reason a narcissist says or does something that gets under your skin, the last thing you should do is let them know they upset you.
Exposing the narcissist is about using their desire for excitement and drama against them, so by escalating the situation you will just be stoking the flames.
Your best bet in a situation like this is to stay firm and plant your feet, and tell them firmly that they can’t speak to you in that way.
If what they said was enough to throw you off, your friends have definitely noticed as well, and so the battle has already been won in your favor.
The lines get blurred when you go into a narcissist’s world of drama and fights, but if you act rationally, you’ll never end up there in the first place.
Number 6: Use your humanity to win the crowd.
As people, we have developed the ability to tell the genuine from the staged.
This is useful, as human beings are considered by many as the only creatures that ever lie.
Fabricated things just don’t seem real to us, and they actually can make a person pretty uncomfortable, which is why the uncanny valley effect is so relevant here.
The same kind of thinking can be applied to emotions, and it's here where you have your biggest advantage over a narcissist.
If you feel like things are getting petty between you and the other person, and that you don’t like how much energy it is taking out of your life, you can always tap into your own humanity.
By treating the other person like a human being, and making sure you do the same to the people the narcissist is trying to convince, you can win the battle without really having to do much at all.
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Number 5: Deny, deny, deny.
The words that destroy a narcissist are the ones that they can’t understand.
If you are ever in a situation where you feel like a narcissist is trying to paint you in a bad light, or they are trying to get you to go along with something, you should always deny it.
Even if you did something as a result of a narcissist frustrating you, don’t think like you ever really have to play fair.
When you turn things around on these kinds of people, their response is often one of confusion or anger.
In these situations, you look much better than them, and their goal of upsetting you blows up in their face.
Number 4: Push them on their own opinions.
A narcissist can be a real stickler for the rules, that is, until it applies to them.
These people will literally find joy in pointing out meaningless flaws in others, but fold almost instantly when that same logic is applied to them.
This is how to make a narcissist panic, as they realize that you flipped things back on them, and made them look pretty silly as well.
Number 3: Band together with their other targets.
In an environment like an office or shared living space, the narcissist is almost always going to go after multiple people, often at the same time.
If you are feeling frustrated but can’t seem to get neutral bystanders on your side, it may be time to team up with another one of their targets.
Forming an alliance with one or more people will make it much harder for this person to divide and conquer, and may even drive them out of the space once and for all if you are intimidating enough.
Number 2: Don’t get baited into a reaction.
If you are doing everything right so far, then you are starting to figure out exactly how to destroy a narcissist’s ego.
The main key here is to starve them of the free attention they have been getting, and to strike when they are isolated or when you have the group on your side.
The biggest thing preventing you from getting the group on your side in most situations, though, is that the narcissist keeps making you look bad.
You see, this person has been trying to get the group on their side since the start, and probably had a bit of a head start.
Every time you get baited into an argument, or they make you look like the bad guy, you are in trouble of losing the group entirely.
Take your shots when the time is right, but don’t force anything or get drawn into a situation where the narcissist looks like the victim.
Number 1: Stop it before it can start.
In all honesty, the best thing you can do with a narcissist is to stop them before they can even get the momentum going.
You can do this by not opening up right away before you know the person, and looking for the telltale signs of a narcissist.
If you have a good group of friends or colleagues, you should be able to point out that they actually don’t care about them like they might say.
It may seem hard, but dealing with a narcissist is easiest before they have a chance to get dirt on you, and before they even know you are a threat.
If you are quick enough, you should be able to spot a narcissist a mile away, and you shouldn’t be nervous at all about being wrong.
As long as you trust your instincts, doing something is better than having to react later.
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