Coming up next, on The Passion struck podcast. personal accountability is where you own your
responsibility for your actions, your choices and commitments. This is often easier said than done,
especially when holding yourself accountable for a failure or a mistake. Failure to take
responsibility makes you feel like a piece of driftwood move by the current and the win. But
with no apparent direction, you become susceptible to all the negativities in life and meaning starts
to elude you. Welcome to passion struck. Hi, I'm your host, John R. Miles and on the show,
we decipher the secrets, tips and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their
wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock
the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself. If you're new to the
show. I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long form interviews the rest
of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists,
military leaders, visionaries and athletes. Now, let's go out there and become passion struck.
Hello, everyone. And welcome back to momentum Friday in Episode 169 of passion struck recently
rated this week by Apple. It's one of the top five alternative health podcasts. And thank you
again for you all coming here to listen and learn how to live better, be better and impact
the world. If you're new to the show. Thank you so much for being here. If you want to introduce this
to a friend or family member, and we love it when you do that. We now have episodes starter packs,
both on Spotify and on the passion struck website. These are collections of our fans
favorite episodes, we organize into convenient topics to give any new listener a great way to get
acquainted to everything we do here on the show, just go to passion struck.com/starter packs to get
started. And in case you missed my interviews from earlier this week they included Kurt Wilkin, who
is an entrepreneur, a co founder of Hire Better and the author of the new book, who's your mic,
and we discuss his tips of the people that you will encounter and the decisions that you need
to make along your entrepreneurial journey. We also had on Abi Morgan, who's a playwright and
screenwriter of some very popular films and TV series, including the split suffergette,
the Iron Lady, Invisible Woman and many more, and we discuss her new book. This is not a pity
memoir. And in case you missed my solo episode from last week, it was on why do average choices
lead to mediocre results, please check them all out. I also wanted to acknowledge our fan of The
Week Constance Smith, who writes growth in every episode, I started listening to passion struck at
the end of 2021. And since then, this podcast has always been one of my go twos, I always end each
episode with a sense of peace and empowerment. Thank you, John miles for helping me grow as I
navigate life as a young adult, thank you constant so much for that review. They go such a long way
in helping with our ratings and the popularity of the show. And if you love today's episode,
or any of the ones I previously mentioned, we would so appreciate the five star rating a review.
Now let's talk about today's episode, I am often asked why do people fail to take responsibility
for their actions as motivational speaker Jim Rohn once said, either you run the day or the day
runs you this quote highlights the importance of taking charge of our habits or inadvertently
letting our choices dictate the state of our being. In a nutshell, we are doing exactly
what we as humans are programmed to do due to our inactions. We allow life to happen to us. And as
I talked about last week, it's why average choices lead to mediocre results. It's a sign of emotional
maturity. When we accept responsibility for our actions, it displays self awareness and unbelief
that we can change and learn to do better. On the other hand, when we encounter entitlement, trauma,
shame, perfectionism, or denial, it often leads to our failure to hold ourselves accountable.
Instead, we find someone or something else to put blame on when things are not going
our way. And the problem is that it cascades from there. By failing to take the necessary
intentional actions to create the life that you want, you will ultimately end up with the one
that you do not want. In the words of the notable talk show host television producer, actress,
author and philanthropist, Oprah Winfrey, "you are responsible for your life and if you're sitting
around waiting for someone to save you fix you to even help you you are wasting your time because
only you have the power to take responsibility to move your life forward. And the sooner
you get that the sooner your life gets into gear." Taking responsibility in our lives. starts in the
everyday things that we do as well as the habits that we form how you respond when you're in a
traffic situation what you do when you have a financial need the food options that you choose
that impact your health how you react when someone annoys you, as well as countless other situations.
These everyday situations make up the hole and determine if life will happen to us or the other
way around. To illustrate the point of today's episode, I will use the fable of the wise old
man. It's a simple and relatable one but learning and applying its lessons have far reaching impacts
and helping us take charge of our lives. Thank you for choosing passion struck and choosing me to be
your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now let that journey began.
Once upon a time, an old scholar was asked to when a boy of his bad habits the wise old
man took the child for a walk through a garden as they approached a vegetable patch he asked
the young boy to pull out a tiny plant that was growing there. The youth held the plant
between his fingers and easily pulled it out the old Wiseman then asked the boy to pull out
a slightly larger plant the child pulled hard and the plant came out roots and all then the old wise
man pointed to a bush and asked the youth to pull it out of the ground. The boy pulled and pulled
using all his strength and finally he was able to yank it from the ground. The old man then pointed
to a guava tree and asked the young boy to bring it to him. The youth grasped its trunk and tried
with all his might to remove it but the tree would not budge. I can't do it. It's simply impossible,
said the boy puffing and huffing from the effort the why is old men men said so it is with bad
habits and taking responsibility for your actions. When habits are initially formed. It's easy
to stop them from growing but when they become entrenched, they become so much harder to approve
the boy learned a vital lesson from the wise old man take responsibility for your bad choices and
habits while you have control over them else they will start to control you like the story of the
wise old man, it's a lot easier to talk about taking responsibility than to actually do it. As
we can see from this story, taking responsibility for our actions requires us to realize that
we play an integral role in every situation or experience that we encounter. Therefore,
we can all choose our responses. It really is up to us. Let's now examine the effects
of not taking responsibility and the necessary steps to take charge and become our best selves.
So why do people refuse to accept responsibility? Simply put, when you don't take responsibility for
your life, things just happen to you. When I say things I'm referring to every unwanted situation
that you can imagine personal accountability is where you own your responsibility for your
actions, choices and commitments. This is often so much easier said than done, especially when
holding yourself accountable for a failure or a mistake. Failure to take responsibility
makes you like a piece of driftwood moved by the current and wind without any goal or direction
you become susceptible to all the negatives in life and meaning starts to elude you you become
complacent and constantly fear what the next moment may bring. So I want to do a quick check.
Take a moment and ask yourself what things could happen if I don't take personal responsibility
for my life. Think deeply about your answer. Many times we feel helpless when we're faced
with challenges this feeling of helpless sadness or hopelessness is often a result of
our inability to see and understand that we are not merely subjects to circumstances but there
are always available options in any given situation. We need to realize that in life,
we are all given choices to make and those choices not circumstances will ultimately determine the
state of our lives. taking personal responsibility all begins with your understanding of the power
of choice and knowing that you can always choose let us consider the case of Dr. Viktor Frankl, a
neurologist, psychiatrist, philosopher, writer and Holocaust survivor in his autobiographical book
Man's Search for Meaning he emphasized the need for everyone to realize that we all have choices.
Despite the situations that we find ourselves in, he wrote, "We who lived in concentration camps can
remember the men who walked throughout the huts, confronting others and giving away their last
piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything
can be taken from a man but one thing the last of human freedoms to choose one's own way. And
there are always choices to make every day every hour offered the opportunity to make a decision,
a decision which determined whether you would or would not submit to those powers which threatened
to rob you of your very self, your inner freedom, which determined whether or not you would become
the plaything of circumstance renouncing freedom and dignity to become molded into the form
of a typical inmate." Through these words, he made it clear that we each follow our own paths,
and that it's our choices that ultimately make the difference between accepting
responsibility and accountability for our actions. No matter what we may be facing.
Even when you've been mistreated and hurt, you can still in that very situation, choose to focus
on helping others who are in similar predicaments. And although you can't control everything,
you can control the things that absolutely matter, you and only you have the power over your mind.
Once you realize this, you will find the strength to courageously decide to move past whatever stops
you from rising to responsibility. The fact is, it doesn't matter where you come from, or what your
background is. It doesn't matter what someone did to you in the past, what matters is now the
present because the present is all that you have and your willingness to accept it Forgive the
past and ultimately take responsibility will help you move forward into the future that you desire.
So what are some common examples of taking accountability for your actions? There are
many ways to take accountability in your life, including these eight examples you recognize
and own your responsibility for whatever is transpiring. If you hurt someone, you have
the self awareness and willingness to acknowledge how your communication may have been damaging to
the other person you accept responsibility when you're at fault. You stick up for what is right
not what is popular. You stop making excuses for the negative things that happen to you. You don't
pass off accountability or all the failure on to your friends, partner or subordinates. You hold
yourself accountable for missing deadlines. If you experience relationship troubles, you seek to
understand how you are contributing to and even exasperating the challenges and the friction.
So now that I've given you those eight examples, let's discuss the consistency that's required in
taking responsibility. Once you choose to be responsible in your life, you must realize
that it's going to take a lot of conscious effort and strength to stay down that path.
Humans by nature are creatures of habit as I talked about at the beginning of this episode,
we quickly do those things we're already used to doing and whenever we try to do things
differently, there will always be the tendency to step back into our bad habits after you've
decided to take charge of your life. You need to consciously put in the work every day to ensure
that you do what you say like with the story of the wise old man there will be many situations
that will provide the opportunities to exercise your ability to take responsibility recognize them
as they come and see their importance. When you consistently do your best to take charge in each
situation you will strengthen your ability to take accountability for your actions over time
taking responsibility will become your first and natural response. In any given situation,
also check out my previous episode on the science of habits and how to make healthy habits stick.
The aim of this episode isn't to discard the reality of the difficulties in some people's lives
or others. Some people are simply more advantaged than others. They're born and raised into better
homes given access to better financial resources, live and more enabling environments and so forth.
But the reality is life is simply not fair. You must accept your reality because it's all that you
have to work with. When you do you will be able to find meaning in your life. Take responsibility
for your actions and unleash your contribution to the world. Be intentional about taking the
driver's wheel of your life and don't leave it on autopilot. Like that piece of driftwood the only
person who can empower you is you but if you don't take responsibility that power will remain dormant
and eventually die out when you do you will be able to change not just the world within you,
but also the one outside as well. Remember, time only knows one thing and that is to move forward.
If you don't take charge of your life today, you won't only be stagnant you will find yourself
retrenching as the world around you moves forward choose to be intentional with your life today,
I realize it may be difficult for you to take responsibility for your actions particularly when
they have consequences but rest assured it will be worth that John C. Maxwell the best selling author
once penned, "people who blame others for their failures never overcome them. They simply move
from problem to problem to reach your potential you must continually improve yourself and you
can't do that if you don't take responsibility for your actions and learn from your mistakes."
Hey, y'all. I hope you enjoyed the show. I want to thank everyone who wrote in this week
and especially those who tuned in and listen to the show. A link to the transcript will
be in the shownotes videos are on YouTube at John R miles where we now have over 360 videos
for you to peruse, advertiser deals and discount codes are all in one convenient place at Passion
struck.com/deals. I am at John R Miles both on Twitter and Instagram. And you can also find me
on LinkedIn. You are about to hear a preview of the Passion Struck podcast interview with
DJ Vanas, who is an author, internationally acclaimed speaker and author of two New York
Times best-selling books. In the episode we discuss his new book The Warrior Within and
how you can apply the warrior spirit to your life that warrior role in Tribal communities is very
different than the Hollywood image. That's not the image that we have in our tribal communities,
somebody who has dedicated their life to service and it wasn't about glory,
it was about what they could contribute to their tribe. And we sometimes have a
misconception that warrior is all about they get it right every time they make no mistakes.
They don't feel pain. They don't feel fear, which is all baloney. I mean, it's garbage. It gets us
into trouble when we over-romanticize that role. Remember, we rise by lifting others. So share the
show with those you love. And if you found this episode useful, please share it with someone
else who can use the advice that I gave today. In the meantime, do your best to apply what you hear
on the show so you can live what you listen and we'll see you next time live life passion struck