- Welcome back to "Just Between Us" couch show.
Pa, pa, pa, pow, wow, wow, wow.
- That's a cute shirt.
- Thank you.
- I like that.
- You like this color on me?
- Yeah, I do.
- Oh, thank you so much.
- And the eyelash extensions are popping.
Wow.
- I think I am, I look better as a wife.
(Gabe laughing)
- Oh, we forgot to pull up the Patreon.
- Oh yeah.
- "Just Between Us," the podcast version of this
is now on Patreon.
So if you go to Patreon,
you can get all the episodes ad free
and also video of a lot of the episodes.
Most of the episodes.
And that's patreon.com/justbetweenus.
And that's just $3.
- That's just $3, baby, a month.
For eight ad free episodes.
- Truly.
And video. - And video.
- And it would really help us out
because we're trying to keep the show going
'cause we're independent now.
And also, you can play along with hypotheticals,
which some of you guys have been doing on the $10,
no, $5 tier.
And let me tell you,
you guys are very funny, extremely funny.
You might put us out of work actually.
We're gonna have two of you guys
completely take over the show.
Two lucky winners become,
one becomes Allison and one becomes Gabe.
- That's actually sounds really nice.
(light upbeat music)
So on today's episode, I thought we could play a little game
of who knows who better.
- Oh, okay.
- Because, you know, things have been going
too well between us so we need to just sort of--
- Cause a little trouble.
Get a little competition going.
- Okay.
- So, I Googled who knows who better friendship questions.
- Ooh, okay.
- And I pulled a few.
- Okay.
- And so, we'll try to answer them.
And I think the best way to do this is like,
I'll ask you a question, you'll answer it
and then I'll just honor system,
say if that was true or not.
- Yeah, I believe you.
- I'm not gonna make us write it down.
- Yeah. - Okay, great.
- I believe you.
- What was the last show I streamed?
I talked about it with you.
"Man in the High Castle."
- Oh, right.
You were talking about that.
I was like, I knew it wasn't something relevant.
The idea is Hitler won?
- Yeah. - Oh.
- I don't love the concept.
(Gabe laughing)
Well, I know that you watched "Drag Race."
- Yeah.
- I feel like you're not actively
watching a new show these days, are you?
- No, I mean, I watch like,
it's a couple, I would say there's a couple reality shows
I've got deeply into.
- Okay, so that one, "Love Island."
- "Love Island."
That's the one thing I've been watching mostly.
- Okay.
So I get like half a point for that.
- Yeah. - And you get zero points.
- Okay, I get zero points.
But "Love Island" is fine.
I don't really care about shows where they're finding love.
I mostly care about like the drama of "Love Island."
But then like, I like "The Circle,"
because I like that they're trying to fool each other.
- You like to watch manipulation in action?
- Yeah, like "Claim to Fame."
I loved "Claim to Fame."
- What is the premise of "Claim to Fame"?
- Oh, thank God.
Okay, I love "Claim to Fame."
"Claim to Fame," which sounds stupid, but it's not.
It's a bunch of people in a house
and they're all related to a famous person.
- Yeah, I knew that part.
- And then everyone has to try to guess
who their celebrity relative is.
- And how would you guess?
- There's clues all over the house.
- But are you actively lying about who you are?
- Yes, yes.
- And they're trying to catch you in lies or something.
- Uh huh, yes.
They try to lead each other astray
and they make alliances.
And also like, people don't know who people are.
So like, one of the funniest ones was the guy,
this guy was like, the clue was like that he was from Utah.
Like they kept saying Utah.
And the people, they became so convinced
that it was Elton John, famously British.
Absolutely not from Utah in anyway.
But they gas each other up and they convince each other.
It's very funny.
- Okay, our next one.
What is my dream job?
- To just like, have a dog farm.
Like animal rescue.
Like some kind of, I mean, other than like okay,
other than TV showrunner.
- Well, yeah, TV showrunner.
- Yeah, but I'm saying other than our things
that we're going for now.
- Yeah, to like run a sanctuary.
That'd be cool.
- Yeah, dog farm.
- All right, I'll give you a point.
- Yeah. - Because you got both.
- Yeah.
- For you I will say just like incredibly famous.
- Sure, yeah.
- Like where you just make money off of being famous.
- Yeah, I would love to do that.
I wanna be, like, okay.
I think if I can get on "The Circle."
And then from that I can just be on other shows.
- Yeah.
- Like from "The circle."
- You should be a reality show villain as your career.
- Yeah, like, so from "The Circle"
I could get on like, you know, "The Challenge."
And then from "The Challenge" I could get on like, you know
I couldn't do any of the love shows,
but I could get on like other "Dancing with the Stars."
I don't know.
You know what I mean?
I would have to get very famous from "The Circle."
- Yeah, you're not ready to be on "Dancing with the Stars."
- No, not dancing with the, I'm saying
once I'm very famous from "The Circle."
- I guess your other job would just be
like working at a funeral home.
- Yeah, absolutely.
(Allison laughing)
I was thinking of being like,
does any of our followers work at a funeral home
in Los Angeles that wanna hire me?
I'll do whatever you need.
Paperwork, whatever.
Mopping.
I can mop.
- Can you?
- Yeah, I can mop,
Not to your standards,
but probably good enough for dead people.
(Allison laughing)
- What position do I sleep in?
- That's interesting.
- It's only like three options really.
- Is it standing straight up like a horse?
Are you like a, just on your side?
- Yeah, I'm a side sleeper.
- Oh, okay.
What about me?
- Stomach?
- I do sleep, yes, so side or stomach.
I cannot sleep on my back,
which was very hard with top surgery.
I'm like, if I sleep on my stomach
and then I need to have my arms and legs fully out.
- If you have a huge bed, you can.
- I want a king bed so badly.
- Oh yeah.
- Can I tell you something?
Okay, I was talking to these two friends of mine one time
who are dating and they're like, been dating a long time.
So it wasn't like just new relationship energy.
And they were like, "Oh yeah, we had a king bed,
"but we actually had to exchange it
"and get a queen bed
"because we like to sleep holding each other.
"And so it was hard to reach our waters
"on either side of the bed
"because we obviously sleep completely entwined
"holding each other."
And I was like, "What?" - What?
- And they were like, "Yeah,
"so we're in the middle of the bed holding each other
"and we were like, oh, our side tables are too far away."
And I was like, "You sleep every night completely entwined
"holding each other after six years?"
And they were like, "Of course."
(Gabe laughing)
- That's my nightmare.
(Gabe laughing)
- I guess other people are more in love.
- Well, or don't have as many sensory issues.
- Yeah, that's very true.
- What was my worst subject in school?
- Math?
- No.
I was good at math. - Really?
- Yeah.
- Well, I mean, in science
you didn't wanna do any of the dissections.
Was it science?
- What type of science?
Because I was good at some types of science.
- Chemistry? - No.
- Physics. - Yep.
- Oh, physics was a bitch.
- Did not understand a lick of physics.
- Physics was a bitch.
- I didn't understand anything.
I think I got a two on the AP test.
- I didn't even take it.
I didn't even take it.
I was like, this is a waste of everyone's time.
This is a waste of paper.
This is a waste of Scantron.
- And my teacher was so nice,
we would like go over to his home
so he could try to explain it to us.
And I still didn't get it. - Oh no.
Oh God.
- Like I went into that AP exam
being like, "I have no idea what any of this is."
- Yeah, I didn't even bother.
- That's the only subject where I really
was just completely over my head.
- Yeah, physics was hard.
- So is that your answer then, too?
- No, I always struggled in math, always.
Math was always so hard, which is,
you know what's funny?
I'm like, oh, math was such a difficult subject
for me all the time.
Whatever, blah, blah.
I went to a very small school,
so we had the same teachers kind of throughout.
- Oh, so maybe you had a terrible teachers.
- Maybe. - Yeah.
- She was the worst.
She was so mean and her whole thing was being mean.
That was her whole fuckin' thing.
And you know who you are.
You know who you are.
Everyone who went to Poznak
knows who I'm fuckin' talking about.
And she-- - You had her the whole time?
- Yes. - Oh no.
- And she was so mean.
Her whole thing was being mean.
That was her whole thing.
And she took pride in it.
She loved that she was so mean
and everyone was so scared of her.
Yeah.
- I hate people like that. - Right?
What the hell's the point of that?
- It's awful.
- And she was a huge fan of Bruce Springsteen
and I hope Bruce Springsteen hates you if he ever meets you.
(Allison laughing)
- What am I really bad at?
- Forms. - Yeah.
I also am really bad
at reading instructions for something.
- Well, that's forms,
but also, yeah. - Yeah.
That counts as a form.
- Taking in the instructions.
- Like, I need someone to tell me what to do.
I can't read what to do.
- Yes. - I don't like that.
- That's been clear with a lot of technical stuff, right?
- Yeah.
- Where it's like the person will be like,
"Okay, here's the description
"of how to get into the live stream."
And you're like, "No."
Uh uh.
- Okay, for you, yours is trickier.
Maybe I'll say, oh, talking over,
not interrupting people.
- Yeah, talking over people.
I was gonna say sending a nice email.
- Oh, you've gotten better at that.
- Okay, so there's something called Goblin Tools.
I haven't started using it,
but a lot of people have recommended it to me.
- What is it?
- It's apparently something that goes through your stuff
and if you're like a goblin, like whatever,
like a person who's not put together, it goes through
and it's like, "Here's how to make this email sound nicer."
"Here's how people might read this," like interpret this.
- I saw a tweet that was
someone got a response from a job
or like an some email being like,
"Hey, we don't want,
"like this is clearly written by AI."
And then the person wrote back,
"Actually, I'm just autistic."
- This is my new thing.
And this is one, I'm old, and two, I'm autistic.
But this is a real hack actually
for autistic people watching things on television
is that if you go to the thing,
click the thing where they read out loud
what's happening for blind people.
They'll give you clues in there of what's happening.
So, for example, if I'm watching a scene
and something happens
and I'm like I don't understand
what was the unspoken thing or why
what was happening in that scene.
If you play the sound, they'll be like,
"She smiled at him seductively."
- Oh.
- And then I go, "Ah, it was seductive."
So, that's a hack for autistic people.
If you're like, I'm watching this
and I don't know anybody's motivations,
they'll read 'em out loud to you.
- Yeah, a lot of times I'm very confused
about what's going on.
And how people feel about each other.
- Yeah, they'll tell you or you know what I mean?
Or your whole thing where you don't know
if they're supposed to be singing, if it's like good or bad.
So if you play that, it'll probably be like.
"She sings really beautifully."
Like it'll probably tell you.
- I feel like it will distract me.
- It only plays when nobody's talking.
- Oh. - Yeah, yeah.
- Very cool.
- So, that's a little tip.
- Okay, do we do one more?
- Yeah.
- What was my first job?
- An assistant.
Oh, when you were younger?
Did you babysit ever?
- I don't count that as a job.
- What was it?
- Camp counselor.
- Oh, camp counselor.
That's similar.
- At the JCC. - Babysitting.
- It's very different than babysitting.
- Oh, because that's like you have to go in nine to five.
Take care of children.
- Right.
- What age were the kids?
- First year I did it, they were like two.
- Oh boy.
- I was like changing diapers.
And then two and six or something.
And then I did it at a different camp the next summer
and the kids were maybe older, but I can't remember exactly.
- Oh.
- And then I worked at Crabtree in Eagleland.
- Right, okay, I knew there was--
- Famously, my retail experience.
Crabtree in Eagleland. - I knew there was a retail.
- Where I would give people hand scrubs.
- Yes, I knew there was a retail thing
where you were giving lotion.
- Oh yeah, I was giving lotion.
(Gabe laughing)
Okay, for you, I believe that your first job
was catering at a country club.
- Yes, at a synagogue.
- At a synagogue. - Yes, catering.
I worked in catering, yeah.
At a synagogue for weddings and bar mitzvahs.
And I was famously let go.
- Yes.
I think we did okay.
- Yeah, we did good.
- Who do you think did better?
Was like a tie?
- Probably you.
Maybe a tie.
I don't know, I wasn't counting.
I was just enjoying hearing stories.
(Allison laughing)
(upbeat music)
- And that's what competitions should really be about.
The journey. - The story
and the journey
and the ability to trick people
into thinking that your cousin is Elton John.