- BoJack, what are you trying to accomplish here?
- I don't wanna do the show.
- So you're gonna run away like you always do.
- Yeah, I never wanted to do this show.
You faked my signature.
- And I told you that and you said okay
because you wanted to be a good friend to me.
So you can't get points for that
and then resent me for it now.
- It's not about you.
I don't like him.
- Oh, Flip's not that bad.
He's just insecure and he's overcompensating a little.
I know that must be a foreign concept for you.
- No, not Flip, Philbert.
He's a drunk, he's an asshole.
I don't wanna be him.
- So maybe you don't be the drunk asshole.
Maybe this time you have a good attitude
and you don't drink so much
and you show up at your call time,
and then you put on the Philbert costume
and you pretend to be this other guy.
And then, when you're done shooting,
you take off your costume and you're BoJack,
the star of the show that everybody likes.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
- Hey, why are we at an adoption agency?
Are you adopting something?
- I'm trying to.
- Oh.
- So, can you keep it together for the next 10 weeks
so I don't need to come to set every day to put out fires?
You think you could do that?
For me?
(wistful music)
(breathes deeply)
- [Flip] Action.
- Wait, Gina.
Can I ask you a question?
About you?
- Uh-huh.
- Do you think I'm right
and the Philbert character is poorly written
and Flip needs to write him better
so that I don't look so bad?
- Look, I do one of these shows every year
and I keep getting hired because I show up,
do the work, and keep my head down.
- But do you love this script?
Do you love your character? I mean--
- Do I love Internal Affairs director,
Sassy Malone, whose primary character traits are that
she hates bras and loves cold rooms?
Not especially.
It feels gratuitous and male-gaze-y.
But hey, pays for my expensive habit
of having a mortgage in Southern California.
- You don't have to go.
We could hang out.
I'm sure you don't wanna be
all alone in the house by yourself.
- No, I love being alone.
I wish I were alone right now.
(door clacks)
(sighs)
(sorrowful music)
(gulping)
(sighs)
- [BoJack] Huh.
(phone ringing)
(groans)
- [Hollyhock] BoJack?
Why are you up?
- I could ask you the same question.
What, now that you're in college,
you don't need to sleep anymore?
- No, I was sleeping.
You called me and woke me up.
- Oh, right.
Well, I wanted to let you know
that I hearted your Instagram photo.
- Okay.
Cool.
- Well, there were 23 other hearts,
but I don't know if you know who they're all from.
But one was from me.
- Yeah, they let me know.
- Oh, cool, cool.
- Okay.
I'm going back to sleep.
- Fine, but this phone call does
not replace our weekly Sunday call, okay?
- Yeah, I'll talk to you Sunday.
Afternoon.
- Yes, good, because I miss you.
Sorry, that sounded dumb.
I don't miss you, I'm just bored.
That also sounded dumb.
- [Hollyhock] I miss you too, BoJack.
(phone beeps)
- My mother is dead and everything is worse now,
because now I know I will never have a mother
who looks at me from across the room
and says, "BoJack Horseman, I see you."
But I guess it's good to know.
It's good to know that there is nobody looking out for me,
that there never was and there never will be.
No, it's good to know that I am the
only one that I can depend on.
And I know that now, and it's good.
It's good that I know that.
So it's good my mother's dead.
(inhales)
Well, no point beating a dead horse.
Beatrice Horseman was born in 1938 and she died in 2018,
and I have no idea what she wanted.
Unless she just wanted what we all want:
To be seen.
(creaks)
(paper crinkling)
(slurps)
(blows nose)
Is this funeral parlor B?
- Okay.
Now for the real work to begin.
- Real what, now?
- You did the hard part, admitting you need help.
- Did I admit that?
- And now comes the even harder part, getting the help.
Let's talk about your mother.
- You know what?
This has been great.
I got what I wanted and I made so much progress,
so I think I'm done.
(Dr. Indira mumbles) Yes, you did it.
You changed my stripes.
Dr. Indira, you're great at your job.
Goodbye forever.
(Dr. Indira stutters) (door slams)
I went to the room where they were keeping this stuff.
(gun fires) (clangs)
(dramatic music)
Only there was no stuff.
- Oh, my god.
- There was a girl there.
She couldn't have been older than 17.
- Bring in the girl.
- What? What is this?
- Keep going.
We gotta get this tonight.
- A girl?
- [BoJack] They weren't smuggling drugs.
They were smuggling her.
- Hey, are you okay?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
Just do the scene.
- [BoJack] I told her it was going to be okay
and she kissed me.
(lips smack)
- What?
- What did you do to her, Philbert?
- Nothing.
Like I said, she kissed me.
(lips smack)
- Kiss her back.
- What? - We need to get
you kissing her back.
- Kiss me, you idiot.
- Kiss her.
(lips smacking)
- This whole thing is gonna blow.
We gotta bounce, friend-o.
- If Fritz hadn't come for you,
what would you have done with the girl?
- [BoJack] Part of me is sure I couldn't go through with it,
but another part knows that's a lie.
- We can't just leave her here.
- Use your brain, Philbert.
- Malone, you gotta believe me.
I'm a good guy.
If I'd known she was there, I never would've.
- Tell me what happened.
- I'll be back.
You wait right here.
- Come on, lover boy.
(splashing)
- You kissed a young girl and then left her to die.
- I'm a good guy.
I didn't know that she was.
You have to understand, I'm a good guy.
- She trusted you.
- How do you make something right
when you've made it so wrong you can never go back?
- How did you come up with all this?
- It's a story I heard once.
I just changed all the names.
- I'll never forget that night on the U.S.S. New Mexico.
(intense violin)
- Why are you telling me all this?
- It's just good to have someone to talk to.
- [Flip] Cut. (bell rings)
Amazing.
I'm a genius.
(dramatic guitar strum)
- Hey, why do you have a vodka bottle
for every day of the week?
- Oh, that's just my new system I'm trying.
I'm down to one bottle a day.
- Is this like an AA thing?
- No, I don't need AA.
Would you get outta there?
- I want ice cream.
Gimme your keys.
- What? No.
- Come on.
Let me drive the Tesla.
- With your greasy pizza fingers?
Forget it.
- Come on. - Hey!
(dramatic whoosh) - Ooh!
What the hell are these?
- What?
Oh, those-- - Why was this
in your pocket?
Are these for me?
- No. Hollyhock, god, no.
- Oh, god, did you put this in my pizza?
- What?
Of course not. Hollyhock, no.
Give me the--
No! (garbage disposal rattling)
- Oops.
- Hollyhock, those were for my back.
- Wait, for real?
- Yes. - Oh,
then actually oops.
(dramatic music)
(BoJack panting)
(coughs)
- There's gotta be another way to get pills.
How about calling this Jobie guy?
He sounds like a druggie.
- I thought your back hurts.
- Yeah.
- How did you lift me over the fence?
- Well, the adrenaline kicked in--
- Do you really need these pills?
- Hollyhock, how many times?
- I'm just saying, is it at all possible
that maybe you don't--
- Okay, you go to college
and suddenly you're so sophisticated
and I'm just a dumb junkie,
is that it? - What?
No!
- You don't understand anything.
I am in pain-- - No I get that but I--
All the time, my whole life and you have no idea.
So sorry that you had one bad experience with my mom.
But I have been in pain my whole life.
(sigh) - I think you should take me
to the airport.
- Okay.
(plane engine roars) (emotional music)
(seatbelt clicks)
- So I guess I'll see you later.
- Hollyhock I'm sorry.
- Me too.
- Maybe it's possible that I don't,
100% need need the pills.
I thought I did, but yeah.
So, thank you for caring about me.
- Are you going to be okay?
- Yeah.
- I could take a semester off if you need someone.
- No! God no.
Stay...
Stay in school and take your classes
and kiss boys and do the college thing.
I'm gonna be fine.
I get it drugs are bad.
- Not all drugs.
Obviously if you get hurt again and a doctor.
A real doctor prescribes you pain killers you can take them.
But only if you get hurt again.
- Okay.
- You promise?
- Yes, I promise.
- Okay.
I love you.
(inhales) (grunts)
Okay,
bye.
(doors shuts)
♪ Silence release me. ♪
♪ Speaks when I can't. ♪
(whoosh)
(exhales)
- Ugh!
(vehicles whooshing)
(groaning)
(tires squeal) (horn honks)
(crash)
I went to New Mexico to see Charlotte.
She was married with a daughter.
But it wasn't like what you're thinking.
She was 17 which is the legal age of concent
in New Mexico and she wasn't drunk so.
Not that I wanted to.
I never.
And I didn't.
That's the dumbest part of all of this.
I didn't do anything.
I mean, the fact that this has turned into
such a thing for you.
You know, maybe I didn't tell you because
there was nothing to tell.
Did you ever think of that.
I mean she was my friends daughter and she wanted it,
(stutters) and I was...
(inhales) I was in a bad place
because Charlotte had just...
So then she came on to my boat,
Charlotte I mean,
and she walked in and I was with her daughter.
But again nothing had happened yet.
- Yet?
- Nothing happened.
- Goodbye BoJack. - Dianne no.
- Ahh!
- You wanted me to tell you, I told you.
You know everything.
- Please let go of me.
- Dianne please.
- You're hurting me,
and I would like you to let go now.
(BoJack huffs) (Dianne exhales)
(cap pops)
(gulps)
(sad music)
- Give me my pills back!
- No. - So what happens now?
- You turn yourself in.
- Are you kidding?
- I know there's a good man
buried in there somewhere Philbert.
He's the man I fell in love with.
(dramatic piano) (violin screech)
- That man is dead!
(slam) (Gina yells)
Gina, I'm not kidding the pills.
Now! (wall smashes)
- You're out of control.
- Give them to me!
(groaning) (Gina struggling)
- Stop, let go! (whack)
Ahh, you're hurting me.
(heavy breathing)
- [Flip] Okay, cut.
- BoJack, he said cut.
- BoJack, buddy?
- Uh?
- I think he's really strangling her.
- What? Oh no.
Turn the camera back on.
(eerie music) (Gina struggling)
- Gina, you okay?
- Okay, that enough.
(BoJack grunts) (roars)
(heavy breathing)
- What the fuck is wrong with you?
- Uh.
(camera flash)
- Look, you have two options.
You can go back home and try to do things your way
like you've been doing all your life.
Or you can see what these guys have to offer.
(door shuts)
- I don't understand why you're being so nice to me.
After everything you know about me,
all the shit I put you through.
- When I was in high school I had this friend, Abby.
She was my only friend, and we did everything together.
Until she got adopted by the cool kids
and then she turned on me.
So fast.
She used every secret she knew about me,
every vulnerability.
She made me miserable my entire sophomore year.
But then that summer when her mom got sick,
like really sick,
and all her cool friends were off
vacationing in Martha's Vineyard.
I was there for her.
(puffs cigarette) - Why?
- Because I'm an idiot.
And it was Abby,
and I hated her, and I will never forgive her.
But she needed me and she was my best friend,
and I loved her.
But now, you're here.
And I hate you.
But you're my best friend
and you need me.
(deep breath)
You know what you're gonna say?
You wanna practice?
- I'm gonna say,
Hello I am BoJack Horseman.
Obviously you know who I am because I'm very famous,
and also we called ahead.
And I am here because
I need help.
(sighs)
(door opens) (door closes)
(exhales) (uplifting music)