Remember to subscribe, for daily top reddit stories.
Okay storytime...
What’s the cringeyest thing you’ve seen a bride and groom do for their wedding?
At a classmates’ wedding.
They were young - maybe like 22?
23?
There is apparently a caking tradition in some parts of the country, where when they
cut the wedding cake, the couple feed each other a bit and smear each other’s faces
with cake as a joke.
The bride had absolutely made 1000% clear to the groom she did NOT want to be caked.He
did it anyways, and not just a small smear, but full on smushed the slice in her face.
She was stunned initially, then got up, face full of cake, yelled “YOU ASSHOLE I TOLD
YOU NOT TO DO THAT!”and then ran to a back area in the reception.
The groom tried to follow but the bridesmaids/mother of the bride stopped him.
So he sat at the head table awkwardly while half the wedding party rushed off with the
bride.She stayed back there for like an hour.
They eventually did let him back there to check on her.
We could hear her crying and them arguing.
The rest of the reception came to a screeching halt until one of the bride’s aunts emerged
and directed the servers to clear the tables and put on some music.They got divorced 2
years later.
Bride shows up almost 2 hours late to her own wedding.
Southern California in an open field no water no shade.
She shows up and wants to get married in her yoga outfit.
the groom shut it down and when she refused to change her clothes the groom decided to
leave her looking stupid and they never got married.
EDIT: I spoke with my uncle and it turns out he had speculation that his fiancé was sleeping
with her personal trainer.
When she showed up in her yoga outfit it was all he needed to call off the wedding.
She ended up married to her personal trainer and divorced again.
The groom gave a speech thanking everyone for coming that devolved in the space of about
two minutes into a straight-up roast of his new brother-in-law.
They were friends, and the brother-in-law seemed to take it in good humor, but there's
only so much implication of 'I'm for sure going to be ducking your sister tonight' that
you can take before it becomes really cringey.It didn't help that a) I barely knew anyone there
because I was a plus one, and b) I was on the table with the elderly relatives from
that side of the family, who were less than amused.
At the reception line, after the church wedding ceremony:The bride had a large bottle of her
favorite perfume and sprayed each guest with it - female and male, whether they wanted
it or not - as they entered the banquet hall.Some guests complained that the smell of perfume
was so strong that they lost their appetite and couldn't partake of the banquet.
They sang their vows to each other.Neither had a singing voice.Vows were generally bat
sheet crazy, like submissive in the bedroom, and not asking about where she was going.The
autotune microphones were a terrible idea.Their vow songs shared a chorus and it was awful
and they expected the guests to sing along with the chorus.The vows singing lasted 20
minutes.Pure cringe.
The groom sang his vows.
I honestly had to stare at the floor and slow breath to not laugh and get through it.
I wasn't a guest, I was working the wedding.
The bride got drunk and sat on some other dudes lap for two hours and flirted with him
while the groom sat by himself at the head table with a defeated look on his face.
Invite all their facebook friends and expect 700people and like less than 100 show up
Not the groom and bride’s fault.
But the pastor marrying them, talked about his marriage and his kids for 20 minutes.
He was obviously going for something of showing what marriage will be like.
But he full up was talking about how his daughter, Kelsey, learned to walk this way, and his
other daughter’s first words were this and that.
And that he and his wife make love throughout the house because that’s what you do when
in love, etcetera
Bride and groom had to stand there holding hands for 20 minutes right in front of him
as the other 150 of us had to listen about his six life and his kids.
They bought an apple orchard after leaving the city to live a simpler life...and really
doubled down on the apple theme.Apples everywhere: on the tables, in baskets all around the venue,
on the podium where they got married, pictures of apples hanging everywhere, small fake trees
with apples tossed under them, the dude marrying them had an apple tie on, apples somehow incorporated
into every dish for the reception.
The cake was shaped like an apple.It was really ducking bizarre.They sold the orchard a couple
years later because they had no idea what they were doing.
When I was in high school one of my hockey teammates had a kid with his girlfriend when
they were juniors.
They decided to get married and the wedding was officiated by my teammates dad, who also
happened to be our head coach.
The entire wedding was the bride and grooms direct family and the hockey team.
At a Golden Corral.
Then the reception was at.... the same Golden Corral.
Then we had a hockey game that night.
The other team we played that night somehow found out about it and hounded the guy the
whole time.
They were a bunch of big nicks.Now about 7 years later that have a second kid, dad is
an officer in the Air Force, both of his kidsplay hockey and he coaches and refs and him and
his wife look very happy so I’m glad it all worked out for them.Edit: For all of you
asking about the game, I honestly don’t remember if we won.
Hockey seasons a long one with a lot of games and it was 7-8 years ago.And as a side note
I really did not mean for this to be a rip on the couple.
They’re amazing together and doing an awesome job raising their kids in a loving household
where they want for nothing.
They haven’t had the easiest lives but they’re doing the best they can and absolutely killing
it
I haven’t spoken to him in a while but I’ve seen his dad (our old coach) at alumni games
and they’re such an awesome family.
They’re the perfect example of the fact that you don’t need a giant, expensive,
fancy ats wedding to be happy.
As long as you have each other, family, and friends it’s a joyous occasion that should
be celebrated.
Ive worked over 200 weddings at the same venue, many couples wanted fireworks and we had a
company that could always do a show.
The couple ALWAYS, without fail, would pick Firework by Katy Perry to play during the
show.
The ceremony also was the "Name Reveal".
They changed their last name because they didn't want to be stuck to their heritage
and didn't want anything to hold them back.Turns out they changed their name thinking they
could erase their mountains of debt or at least hide from it.
Turns out you can't live under two legal identities....
Oh I have two!The bride decided to sing as she walked down the aisle.
She was not a particularly talented singer, and she was singing over a Carrie Underwood
song so we could all hear the original vocal track.
She finished walking about halfway through the song and then stood there and sang the
rest of the song at the groom and all we could do was sit there and watch.
(Different wedding) They began the wedding with the groom playing an out of tune guitar
and singing to the bride.
They were sitting on chairs in front of everyone, legit 400 people, and the bride was clearly
uncomfortable which made everyone else uncomfortable.
That wedding also included a foot washing ceremony, and when the bride put her shoes
back on she tripped on her dress and fell flat on her face.
They hadn’t done the vows yet and the ceremony stopped for 20 minutes to deal with the nosebleed
she gave herself.
Bride takes three hours to appear.
After the ceremony, she and her spouse go up in an air balloon.
The marriage did not last a year.
My cousin and his wife are SUPER religious and maybe the two most awkward people I've
ever met.
They did one of those 'fake out' first dances where it starts with a slow song then transitions
to a dance number with an upbeat song.Not only is that naturally cringe worthy, the
upbeat song was 5 minutes long and they just kept repeating the same moves over and over
for what felt like eternity.
There was no alcohol allowed at the wedding, so there was nothing to dull the pain.
When I was 11 my cousin got married for the 3rd time.
I never really liked her because A.)
She was 37 when I was 11, we didn't have a lot in common and B.)
She was pretty full of herself.
The wedding itself was fine, pretty boring but fine.
Then we get to the reception.
We were told we had to sit down as soon as we got there, some people found it weird but
I've only been to one other wedding before this (her other marriages were when I was
little, no kids were allowed at her weddings) so I didn't think anything of it.
The Bride and Groom then make a huge dramatic entrance and everyone awkwardly clapped for
them as they strutted around the room with actual crowns on their heads.
The Bride then gets the microphone and hands it to her mom and asks her to say something
she loves about the bride.
She then tells her mom to pass it on and says she wants EVERYONE in the room to say one
thing they absolutely love about the bride.
Not the bride and groom, not their relationship, just the bride herself.
It was super awkward...lol so for everyone asking "What did you say???"
And "Where is she now??"I said "Your eyeshadow is pretty."
Because I felt so awkward and wanted to die.
My older brother said "Pass" which made her force a fake laugh and urge him to say something.
He ignored it and she kept insisting so he said "your parents."
And passed the mic on.She and husband 3 divorced a few months later because he was caught cheating
with an 18 year old still in high school.
He gave off bad pedo vibes to the point where even strangers noticed and wanted kids to
stay away from him.
She married another guy a few years later and they are still together.Bonus she likes
to take pictures with a life-sized cutout of Trump and post it on Facebook because she,
her mom, and sister believe it looks so REAL (nope) and she even pretends she's been caught
cheating on husband 4 with cutout.
Posting pictures of her kissing it or it in her room with a caption like "Oops, caught
with my side piece ;)" or some cringe like that.
Husband is also a hard Trump supporter so he laughs about it but her daughter (From
marriage 2) deleted her from Facebook and often stays with her dad because she can't
stand her mom anymore.
Flew away in a helicopter at the end but there were only appetizers for food
My own wedding, so me..
My brother and our wedding band surprised us with a beautiful rendition of a very romantic
song by a guy called Juan Luis Guerra, just so happened to be me and the missus' favorite
song ever.
Lots of happy crying and one of the best memories from that day.
Unfortunately, my MiL doesn't like to be one upped, so she impromptu got a distant 2nd
cousin from her side of the family who we did not know to immediately sing "My heart
will go on" from Titanic.
He was not a good singer and used a sheetty youtube karaoke track and it lead to very
awkward slow dancing, followed by fuming from her after we cut it short (terrible feedback
from trying to play the track on the mic from phone's speaker).
Just completely deflated the beautiful moment from my brother's singing.
At least I'm happy to say we're still going strong and have been married for 10 years
now.
It should go without saying that little poop nugget of singing was NOT included in our
wedding video.......
The Crazy itch bride entrance no one knew about
.....
Not the bride and groom but the bride’s father.
I was the best man.They married young after she fell pregnant, it wasn’t planned, but
they clearly loved each other and it was the right thing for them to do in their eyes (both
Christian).Anyway, come the wedding day I’m sat next to the brides father at the reception
and I can see he’s looking at his prepared speech repeatedly.
I can see phrases like ‘not ideal’, ‘would’ve preferred not to welcome you into the family
in these circumstances’ etcetera
Just before the groom gets up to give a speech, the bride’s father excuses himself to nip
to the loo leaving his ‘speech’ behind.
I’m not ashamed to say I swiped it and then pleaded ignorance when he returned.
In the end he stood up and muttered a few words about love and then sat down.I never
told the groom and I’m happy to say they’re still happily married 20 years later....
The groomsman prepared a skit in which they "lost" the groom at the reception and proceeded
with over the top hands on hips " Hey guys- Aren't we forgetting SOMETHING?
Well , where can he POSSiBLY Beeeeee?"
acting like some high school musical.
None of the guest were prepared and silently fussed around with their drinks and silverware.
When the whole thing ended, they anticipated like a standing ovation but it went over the
heads of everyone.
A lone voice muttered "That was kinda weird..." as they made their exit quietly
EDIT: I guess this blew up to the point i should try to remember some of the skit.
It was some of the corniest sheet i saw, not sure if some of them were inside jokes to
the groomsmen crew:They all entered into themain area together minus the groom
One guy had the fakest cartoony voice "Hey aren't we missing something"?
"It cant be me, because I'm Alwaaaaaays prepared!
(Winks and Pause for laughs) ..... "What about your bowtie?"
Oh Noooo (Produces tie, puts it on, waits for audience reaction) No wait!
Its the groom!
Wheeeere can he PoSssibly BEeEeee?This went on for a bit, i don't remember it all because
i was on my phone not really doing anything but to avoid eye contact every time they said
a line and desperately scanned across the audience.
In the end the groom came out through the door when he was cued, i don't think he knew
about the skit, thank god he wasn't there to see it unfold.
As for the crowd, who isn't gonna clap and whistle when the newlyweds show up at a wedding
so it was all good.
Friend of friends.
Young, uber-Christian small town naive girl.
Meets married, much older man with two kids.
Falls in love.
He does eventually leave his wife.
Doesn't want any custody.Wedding was her hometown church.
His vows were over the top about how he has never felt love before, she is the only woman
he ever wanted to marry, he's been so lonely his whole life, etcetera
He's literally sobbing through it all.
Her turn to say her vows and she's standing there saying nothing for at least three beats.
Then she is handed a microphone and the piano starts playing.
She's made up her own song which are her vows.After the ceremony we adjourn to the church basement
for the alcohol-free reception.
I'm somehow roped into serving the groom's cake.
It's two NASCAR car cakes made with an edible photo draped over the cake shapes andimpossible
to cut through without mangling the cake so I have to peel it off.
My friend is cutting the bride's cake and it's a full inch or more of fondant on top
of plain cake.
No frosting.The "buffet" was potluck from her family.
Food you'd expect at a kid's party.
Pink punch was the only thing to drink.
No dancing because of her religion.Then they left for their "honeymoon" at the town's only
hotel which was like a Motel 6 level dump in a two-horse drawn carriage.
Dated a girl in my 20s and went to her friend’s wedding in upstate New York.
In the middle of the service the minister’s cell phone rang, he answered, it was God,
God wanted to talk to the groom, conversation lasted a couple minutes, then the ceremony
continued.
This was more so the bride's family...
One of my first classmates to get married (we were ~19) had a small reception, mostly
family and friends from high school (nothing wrong with that).
They decided to "auction off" the garter belt, and whoever won took it off the bride.
Most of us were poor college students, so the only people bidding were her dad and uncles.
It was super uncomfortable.Edit: I did not expect this reaction!
So to answer the most common questions: the bride's (very drunk) dad "won" to the tune
of $500+ (money grab by the couple to "help" with honeymoon expenses), this was not Alabama
(North Dakota), and this was not the "normal" garter tradition by any means, just a particularly
cringeworthy version of an already cringey tradition.
Instead of throwing rice (or confetti, or sprinkles, or anything like that) the bride
and groom asked their friends to save all their empty Juul pods and throw those as they
walked down the aisle.
The friends obliged...
At the beginning of the reception, we all had to stand up and sing the national anthem.To
be clear, this was in another country I'd never been to a wedding in before, so I thought
"ok maybe this is just a tradition I've never heard of before here!"
Then I told this to other people, and they were all like "no, that's just really weird."Also,
at that wedding the father of the groom ended his speech with what I'm sure he thought was
an amazing joke, on how it's easier to build a bridge to Hawaii than to understand what
a woman is thinking.
It would have been awkward enough had the man not also been standing between his ex
and current wife as he was delivering it.
I know a guy who recently made his lackies, sorry friends, compete to be his best man.
Most pretentious thing I have ever seen.
Watching them grovel was so upsetting to me.
My wife and I don't dance, so we hadn't danced together before our wedding dance.
Loved it, but it was cringe-worthy.
I was at a wedding when I was 8 and instead of the bride and groom getting up to make
their speech thanking everyone, they had done like an awards show.
So the DJ opened up an envelope, announced their names, they were handed and “awards
statue” (a Barbie and Ken doll) and proceeded to thank everyone in the form of an awards
speech.
In the right hands, it would have been funny, but the bride and groom are incredibly shy
by nature so it was just awkward.
I’m in my 30s now and I still remember this
I went to a wedding once where they did a potluck.
I guess it okay depending on the type of wedding, but the reception was at a fairly nice venue,
the wedding couple was like an hour and a half late, and their best man didn't have
a speech ready so it went on for a very painful 15-25 minutes, also stating in there that
they're going to have great six now that they're married.
This was a devout Christian wedding with many of the friends (including me) were from church.
By the time me at like table 15 got to eat, I was lucky if I got something that was kept
warm in a Crock-Pot, but everything else was room temperature.
We were able to to go home between the ceremony and the reception, but I bet most food had
been sitting in people's cars since that morning.Oh, also the church that she moved to did the
whole "no kissing before marriage" thing and started making out with her new husband on
the altar to the point where the pastor had to say "okay, that's enough."The whole thing
was weird.
Bride entered to Braveheart soundtrack blasting on boom box.
Civil service that lasted a few minutes starting at around 1 pm.
She leaves to same blasting Braveheart soundtrack.
The mother announces that the reception starts at 5:30 pm.
There is no food and no bar, but trays of dessert bars will be served.
We are also told the venue is locked until then so there is no place to wait!My girlfriend
and I leave with a crowd of people to across the street to an Irish pub for drinks.
A bit of a party breaks out there.
We all gettold to knock it off and come wait back at the venue in the hall.
So we sit in the hall on the carpet for a few hours without drinks or dinner.Bride and
groom arrive and enter the venue to an “honor guard” of floor hockey players wearing hockey
jerseys and holding sticks above their heads like swords at a royal wedding.
More Braveheart music of course.Place emptied out pretty quick as people either left to
go back to the pub or to the fast food place a bit further away.
Our dinner was lemon squares and a can of Coke from a vending machine in the lobby.Funny
stuff.Edit: I should mention that I got guilt tripped into staying after the event to help
clean up as I “lived nearby and didn’t have to work that day”.
It was the perfect ending.
It’s a tie between my sister breaking her knee (seriously) at her own wedding dancing
to the cotton eyed joe and my stepsister having her reception at an honest to god truck stop
while 6 months pregnant.
In her defense, the food was good but WOW was it weird walking through a gas station
in formal wear.
Friend's wedding.
The bride wanted to sing him a song, so she did a kind of karaoke thing.There's *bad*
singing, and then there's whatever the hell this was.
It was so awkward.Also, dude asked a professional photographer friend of ours to photograph
the wedding about a year before.
Got a super non-commital answer.
Never followed up.
And was SHOCKED that the photographer didn't show up.
(After he specifically declined the invitation because he was going to be in another country).Had
the entire set of groomsmen rent *ridiculously* expensive Tuxedos.
Which, fine.
Cool.
Happy to be here.
He's having his Tux custom tailored, asks for something ridiculous and gaudy, but when
quoted the price says he can't swing that and insiststhey do it for about 1/4 the price.
They do their best to meet specifications within the given price range, but it's bad.
Really bad.
So, the groomsmen look amazing, and he looks like a clown that didn't put on his makeup.Has
another friend make a custom batch of meade for the toast, but rents a hall that doesn't
allow outside alcohol, so it can't be used for the toast during the reception.It was
probably the cringeyest thing I've ever seen, not just the cringeyest wedding or even cringeyest
*thing* at a wedding.
The minister (or pastor?)
used to date the bride and gushed about how wonderful she was.
Told the groom if he ever died not to worry, he'd take care of her.
I was shell shocked.
I so wished I could think of a reason to ask the couple for a copy of the video of their
wedding but couldn't quite find a legit one.Bride entered to Braveheart soundtrack blasting
on boom box.
Civil service that lasted a few minutes starting at around 1 pm.
She leaves to same blasting Braveheart soundtrack.
The mother announces that the reception starts at 5:30 pm.
There is no food and no bar, but trays of dessert bars will be served.
We are also told the venue is locked until then so there is no place to wait!My girlfriend
and I leave with a crowd of people to across the street to an Irish pub for drinks.
A bit of a party breaks out there.
We all get