SO IT IS JUST US.
I GUESS I SHOULD READ MY
MONOLOGUE.
[LAUGHTER]
WELCOME BACK TO A BRAND-NEW
YEAR.
ARE YOU EXCITED OR WHAT?
I KNOW KAT AND EMILY SHOULD BE
BECAUSE I HAVEN’T CRUSHED THEM
FOR THEY WERE JOKES IN MY
ABSENCE.
>> AND LIKE GREG WHEN HE SITS IN
THIS CHAIR COME I DON’T NEED A
BOOSTER RIGHT NOW.
THAT IS RIGHT.
CULTURAL REFERENCE NEW AND 40
YEARS OLD.
YOU WON’T GET THAT WITH
GREG GUTFELD.
IS GREG TIED UP, NAKED WITH
DUCT TAPE IN OVER HIS MOUTH?
NO, THAT WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL.
SHOULD WE CALLED HIM GIGANTIC
GREG FROM NOW ON?
>> I WILL NOT BE.
[LAUGHTER]
>> Greg: YEAH, LAUGH IT UP.
THEY WERE YAKKING IT UP AT MY
EXPENSE.
I SPENT THE LAST EIGHT DAYS IN
ONE BED.
I USUALLY PREFER EIGHT DIFFERENT
MEDS EACH NIGHT LIKE WILL
CHAMBERLAIN, BUT I WAS SICK.
I TESTED NEGATIVE ON COVID BUT I
TESTED POSITIVE ON EVERYTHING
ELSE.
I’M PRETTY SURE I HAVE THE FLU,
THE COLD TO COME AS, Z GUTH,
EBOLA, BUT WHAT DO YOU EXPECT
WHEN YOU BORROW A JACKET?
WHO MUGGED A RODEO CLOWN?
YOUR SHIRT HAD A TRIPLE BYPASS.
I’M NOT KIDDING.
THAT THING HARBORS MORE BACTERIA
THAN A PORTABLE TOILET.
THANKS FOR THAT SINGLE LAUGH.
BUT THANK GOD AND MADE IT
THROUGH.
I WOULDN’T MISS IT FOR THE WORLD
BECAUSE WHAT A YEAR WE HAVE
PLANNED.
I’M AN OPTIMIST AND NOT JUST
WHEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR, THE
BEST SIGN WATCHING THE LEGACY
MEDIA REALIZE THEY ARE SCREWED.
YOU KNOW THINGS ARE BAD IN 2022
WHEN STILL RELIVING 2021.
HERE THEY ARE GEARING UP FOR
THEIR VERSION OF CONFLICT
CHRISTMAS KNOWN AS JANUARY 62.0.
THE ONLY THING THAT CAN SAVE
TRIPLE CABLE NETWORK IS THE
GHOST OF PRESIDENTS PAST SANTA
TRUMP.
YOU SEE, THERE IS AN INFORMAL
NETWORK OF REPORTERS WHO HAVE
BEEN THROUGH WITH THAT DAY AND
STILL COPING WITH THAT, LEANING
ON EACH OTHER, TALKING TO EACH
OTHER.
>> THERE’S AN INFORMAL NETWORK
OF REPORTERS WHO HAVE BEEN
THROUGH IT THAT DAY THAT ARE
STILL COPING WITH THAT LEANING
ON EACH OTHER AND TALKING TO
EACH OTHER.
THEY ARE ALL STILL DEALING WITH
THAT AND CONVEY TO OTHERS HOW
SERIOUS IT WAS.
>> Greg: YEAH BECAUSE ONLY YOU
GUYS THOUGHT IT WAS SERIOUS YOU
JACK [BLEEP].
EVERYONE THOUGHT IT SUCKED BUT
LIKE YOU THEY ARE NOT TRYING TO
TURN A PROFIT ON IT BUT OUR
NATIONS BRAVE JOURNALISTS ARE
PROCESSING IT LIKE A PRICE SURGE
AND RESPONSIBLY RAISED CHICKENS.
YES, TAKING A RIOT OR ONLY A
NATURAL DEATH WAS COP SHOOTING
AN UNARMED WOMAN AND MAKING IT
OUT TO BE WORSE THAN 9/11.
IT HURTS THAT STILL COPING WHILE
EVERYONE SAW IT FOR WHAT IT WAS
COMMON UGLY EVENTS EVENTS THAT
CAME AND WENT.
BUT CNN CANNOT LET GO AND THEY
NEED TO CONVEY TO OTHERS HOW
SERIOUS IT WAS FOR THEM.
BECAUSE THEY ARE THE REAL
VICTIMS AND WHY?
REPORTING WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED
DIDN’T SCARE ENOUGH PEOPLE.
MUCH LIKE BODY SPRAY, THE
HYSTERIA HAS LONG WORE OFF.
ALL THAT IS LEFT IS THE STENCH.
SO WHAT IS LEFT FOR CNN BESIDES
TO CATCH A PREDATOR REBOOT?
>> THEY GOT THE STORES.
>> THEY HAVE TO CREATE A
DISTRACTION.
LOOK AT THIS GUY WEARING A
VIKING HAT PART OF INSURRECTION
AND NO ONE CHARGED INSURRECTION
FOR.
HE IS SO SCARY, HE NEEDED A
HALLOWEEN COSTUME.
BUT THE JOURNALS WERE THE REAL
VICTIMS HERE.
>> SOMETIMES I’M FINE, SOMETIMES
I WANT TO SOB FOR HOURS.
SOMETIMES I JUST WANT TO SLEEP.
SO THAT SOUNDS TO ME LIKE
TRAUMA, LIKE PTSD.
DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU STILL
EXPERIENCE THAT?
>> I DO THINK SO TO A CERTAIN
EXTENT.
>> IS THAT FOR YOU AS WELL?
>> I’VE HAD EXPERIENCE IN MY
LIFE WITH A BAD CAR ACCIDENT
WHERE I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH PTSD.
I’M GRATEFUL FOR THIS AS I’VE
BEEN DOING WITH JANUARY 6TH.
>> TO KNOW THE SIGNS OF PTSD.
>> EXACTLY, TREATMENT, I KNOW
WHAT IT IS.
>> THEY ARE ALL SUFFERING FROM
PTSD EXPERIENCE PRIME MILITARY
VETERANS AND ACTUAL VIOLENT
CRIME VICTIMS.
YOU KNOW THE PEOPLE WHOSE
COMPLAINT, THE PRESS NORMALLY
IGNORES.
IF THESE JOURNALISTS ARE
VICTIMS, SO IS JUST A SMALL
LEAD.
THEY HAVE A HATE CRIME AGAINST
THEMSELVES AND HERE THEY ARE
DEMANDING COMPASSION.
SOMETHING STRANGELY MISS AND WIN
THOUSANDS OF AMERICANS DYING IN
THE RIOTS, THEY CAN WITH THE
MEDIA CNN IGNORED BACK WHEN
EVERYTHING WAS MOSTLY PEACEFUL.
THEY HAD THOSE VIOLENT DETAILS
LIKE THE SECRET SERVICE HIDES
JOE BIDEN’S CAR KEYS.
SO THE MEDIA APPROPRIATES THE
PAIN OF REAL VICTIMS JUST LIKE
WHEN THEY BLAMED THE TERROR
ATTACK AND WAUKESHA ON AN SUV.
THEY CERTAINLY DIDN’T FEEL THIS
WAY WHEN VIOLENT WAS RAMPANT
THROUGH TWO DOZEN CITIES BY
LIVES.
PERHAPS BECAUSE THEY WERE FAR
REMOVED FROM THE DESTRUCTION
THAT THEY PAPERED OVER.
YOU SEE, THAT IS WHY IT IS THE
SOLDIERS THAT GET PTSD, NOT THE
PEOPLE WHO SENT THEM TO WORK.
YOU CAN’T BLAME THEM FOR TRYING.
THE POLLING HAS SHOWN THE
COUNTRY MOVED ON FROM CNN’S
LATEST FETISH, AT LEAST THE ONE
THAT IS LEGAL.
IF THE PUBLIC SEES THE
REPUBLICANS MOVING AND THE RIGHT
DIRECTION, THE DEMS KEEP SINKING
LIKE AN iPHONE DROPPED IN A
TOILET.
I DON’T KNOW IF THE REPUBLICANS
HAVE ANY ANSWERS.
SINCE WHEN DO ANY POLITICIANS
THESE DAYS LIKE MAROON 5
CATALOG.
I PRETTY MUCH HATE THEM ALL.
BUT ANYTHING IS BETTER THAN WHAT
THE DEMS ARE SERVING.
IT IS 2022, BUT IT’S DRESSED UP
NOW HAS 2021.
I MIGHT HAVE THAT BACKWARDS.
[LAUGHTER]
INFLATION, COVID, CRIME, IT IS A
BOTTOMLESS PIT WITH SPIKES AT
THE BOTTOM, EMILY.
[LAUGHTER]
AND THAT EXPLAINS CNN GOING ALL
IN ON JANUARY 6TH.
YOU CAN SEE RIGHT THROUGH IT
LIKE MILEY CYRUS TUBE TOP.
MAYBE JANUARY 6 WILL BE THE
DIVERSION WE SEE WITH THE
DISMISSAL OF SUFFERING DEMOCRAT
RULE IN 2021.
MAY BE FOCUSED JANUARY 6,
AMERICA WILL NOT LOOK AT EVERY
SINGLE DAY OTHER THAN THAT WHERE
CNN DISMISSED AND VICTIMS OF
PERSECUTION DESERVED IT AND
LAW ENFORCEMENT WAS WORSE THAN
THE THUGS THEY TRIED TO PROTECT
YOU FROM.
MEANWHILE, THEY COVERED FOR THE
SCREWED UP ANCHORS, POLITICAL
RELATIVES AND DEVIANT PRODUCERS.
IN 2021 CNN DID MORE COVERING UP
OF THE NEWS THAN ACTUAL COVERING
OF THE NEWS.
SO I GET IT, FOR CNN JANUARY
JANUARY 6TH, IT REALLY IS THERE
CHRISTMAS.
>> SO THEY DID KILL
JAMES VAN DER BEEK.
>> THEY ARE YOU ARE.
>> HEY.
>> I GOT YOU SOMETHING.
>> WHAT, CHRISTMAS WAS LAST
WEEK.
>> OH, NO, THIS IS JANUARY 6TH.
I GOT IT FROM CNN THERAPY.
>> YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE.
OH, MY GOD, I LOVE IT!
>> I KNEW YOU WOULD.
IT COMES WITH ACCESSORIES.
[LAUGHTER]
>>>> Greg: TERRIBLE.
BLAME AND THEY ALL MAKE GOOD
STOCKING STUFFERS.
SANTA IS HERE TO SAY IT IS YOU
THAT ARE NAUGHTY AND THEM WHO
ARE NICE.
PIECE OF ADVICE?
DON’T SIT ON IT.
A CRAZED APPLAUSE.
LET’S WELCOME TONIGHT’S GUESTS.
HE’S SO BRITISH, EVEN HIS
CRUMPETS HAVE A STIFF UPPER LIP.
COMMENTATOR DOUGLAS MURRAY.
[APPLAUSE]
SHE IS SKILLED AT LEADING
CHEERS, WRITING STEERS, DOWNING
BEERS, OUTNUMBERED COHOST
EMILY COMPAGNO.
[APPLAUSE]
AND WHEN HE SAW AND SAID, THAT
FREES UP ONE EXTRA BED AT THE
HOMELESS SHELTER.
THE FOUNDER MICHAEL.
[APPLAUSE]
AND NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS ARE
ALL COURT ORDERED.
[LAUGHTER]
THAT WAS A HEFTY LAUGH BECAUSE
IT IS TRUE.
FOX CONTRIBUTOR KAT TIMPF.
[APPLAUSE]
ALL RIGHT, WELL WOW, SO ANYWAY
MY VM THE REAL VICTIM AND I JUST
GOT BACK, THANK YOU FOR THE KIND
CARD AND I THINK THAT WAS YOU
THAT SENT ME THE CARD.
>> I DIDN’T SEND ANYTHING.
>> Greg: YOU JUST MADE ME
SPIT.
CAN YOU BLAME CNN FOR NOT MOVING
ON?
THIS IS THE ONLY THING THAT GOT
LEFT AT THIS POINT.
>> IT IS TRUE.
THERE IS SOMETHING UGLY ABOUT
JOURNALIST TALKING ABOUT
THEMSELVES.
IT USED TO BE A RULE INTERNAL IS
THAT YOU NEVER TALK ABOUT
YOURSELF.
>> Greg: RIGHT.
>> THE REPORTERS DIDN’T SAVE THE
STORIES ABOUT ME.
YOU REPORTED ON WHAT YOU SAW.
I KNOW THE LONG-TERM RESPONDENTS
THAT DON’T DO THIS.
THEY JUST DON’T DO IT.
THEY DON’T TURN UP AND TELL
EVERYBODY ELSE I GOT PTSD FROM
IT.
AND HIS INNARDS DON’T DIAGNOSE
PTSD ON-AIR.
[LAUGHTER]
>> Greg: TRUE.
>> BUT OF COURSE THEY DON’T WANT
TO LET GO OF IT, THEY ARE THE
HEROES.
>> Greg: YES.
>> THEY’VE ALWAYS WANTED TO BE
SINCE THEY FIRST SAW THE
PRESIDENT’S MEN.
>> Greg: THAT IS TRUE,
WHENEVER YOU CAN BE THE
PROTAGONISTS WHY WOULDN’T YOU?
YOU ARE NOW WEARING THAT
MUTANT -- MUTANT [LAUGHTER]
>> YOU CAN DO IT, PULL IT OUT.
MUTANT.
>> IT IS LIKE SOMEBODY WHO HAD
ONE OF THOSE ZIPPER SURGERIES.
[LAUGHTER]
THAT YOU HAD YOUR PECKS REMOVED.
>> POCKETS, JUST RIP IT OUT.
>> Greg: WHERE DID THAT COME
FROM?
>> I GOT THIS FROM BILLY GIBBONS
DUMPSTER.
>> Greg: ZZ TOP.
>> THERE YOU GO.
>> Greg: SHOULD CNN FOCUS ON
THIS?
ARE WE NOT FOCUSED?
>> THEY SHOULD KEEP GOING.
THEY NEED TO’S SHINE A SPOTLIGHT
ON THIS.
IT’S ALL ABOUT ME, I’M A VICTIM.
HERE IS WHAT I LIKE TO DO.
THE LEFTY COMMIES AND THE LEFT,
THEY HAVE THIS WHOLE CRY BULLY
MENTALITY.
THE ACT LIKE "OH, IT IS
UNPRECEDENTED."
IT’S NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE.
I’VE BEEN TRAUMATIZED AND
SOMEONE IS TO PASS A LAW AND THE
GOVERNMENT NEEDS TO COME -- LIKE
IT SO HORRIBLE TO WATCH AND SO
PREDICTABLE AND BORING.
THEY ACT LIKE THE CAPITAL HAS
NEVER BEEN ATTACKED BEFORE.
I THINK IT WAS BOMBED IN THE
’80s AND IT WAS BOMBED IN THE
POSTRACE 70s AND A SHOOTING IN
THE
’50s.
AND IN 1812 --
[LAUGHTER]
>> Greg: I’M GLAD YOU BROUGHT
THAT UP.
NEVER FORGET, NEVER FORGET.
BUT THE THING THAT THEY ARE
DENYING AND THIS IS THE THING
BECAUSE IT REQUIRES TO GO
THROUGH THIS EXERCISE OF
CONDEMNING IT.
WE ARE NOT LIKE THE MOSTLY
PEACEFUL RIOTS WE SAID THOSE ARE
FREAKING RIOTS IN JANUARY 6TH,
IT SUCKED.
THAT WAS A RIOT.
NO ONE IS DENYING THAT BUT CNN
PRETENDS, THEY PRETEND THAT THEY
DIDN’T DENY THE REAL VIOLENCE
AND THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES
TALKING ABOUT THIS.
AND SO IN ORDER TO BUY INTO THIS
LIKE, YOU ALMOST HAVE TO HAVE
LIKE CHEMICALLY INDUCED AMNESIA.
>> YOU HAVE TO BE EXCLUSIVELY
FOCUSED ON THIS, OR YOU DIDN’T
GIVE IT ENOUGH ATTENTION.
>> Greg: RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT.
>> THE EDITORIAL BOARD SET UP A
DAY IS JANUARY 6TH.
YES, YOU ARE EITHER OBSESSED
WITH IT OR IT’S NOT ENOUGH.
AS THEY DIAGNOSED THEMSELVES
WITH TRAUMA AND THE LIKE IS THAT
YOU THINK AS THEY EXPERIENCE
THIS ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE DAY AND
HAVING PTSD FROM IT THEY WOULD
EMPATHIZE WITH THE MILLIONS OF
AMERICANS WITH YEARS OF VIOLENCE
IN THESE LAST COUPLE OF YEARS
WITH 500 FAMILIES THAT LOST
LOVED ONES TO HOMICIDE, TO
GUNSHOTS IN D.C. OR
NEW YORK CITY, 800 IN CHICAGO.
THE GUY THAT WAS BEATEN TOGETHER
IN FRONT OF HIS TWO CHILDREN
HANGING CHRISTMAS LIGHTS.
THE LIST GOES ON OF THE ENDLESS
ACROSS AMERICA AMERICA THAT ARE
ABSOLUTELY RIPPED A PART BY
SKYROCKETING CRIME STATISTICS
AND BY URBAN CENTERS THAT HAVE
ABSOLUTELY IMPLODED.
YOU WOULD THINK THESE GUYS WOULD
EXERCISE SOMETHING AND SAY I
HAVE A LOT OF UNDERSTANDING SO
LET ME REPORT ON IT.
LET ME LIFT UP AND AMPLIFY YOUR
VOICES BUT THEY ARE ABSOLUTELY
IGNORING WHAT VOTERS CARRY CARE
AND THEIR LIKELIHOOD TO.
>> Greg: TO BOIL DOWN THAT
VERY LONG BORING ANSWER --
>> SORRY.
>> Greg: THINK ABOUT THIS [BLEEP] THOSE [BLEEP] SPENT MORE
[BLEEP] THOSE [BLEEP] SPENT MORE
TIME TALKING ABOUT PTSD.
THAT WAS A PERSON SHOT DEAD
UNARMED WOMAN.
I DON’T REMEMBER CNN TALKING
ABOUT THE PTSD OF HER FAMILY OR
ANYBODY THERE WHO SAW HER GET
KILLED, UNARMED!
THAT IS A LOT TO DIGEST.
LET’S GO TO KAT TIMPF.
[LAUGHTER]
KAT, WHAT IS GOING ON WITH YOU?
YOU GOT SICK TOO.
I WILL NOT ASK YOU WHAT YOU HAVE
BECAUSE IT’S NONE OF MY
BUSINESS.
>> I HAVE OMICRON M PTSD.
I GUESS, IF THAT IS WHAT IT IS.
SOMETIMES I’M FINE, SOMETIMES
I’M SOBBING.
THAT IS NORMAL.
>> Greg: THAT IS MY LIFE!
[LAUGHTER]
>> HOW I LIVE.
I JUST HOPE THEY ARE LYING.
I HOPE IT’S NOT TRUE THAT
THERE’S REALLY NOT THIS GROUP OF
PEOPLE THAT NEEDS TO HANG OUT
AND TALK ABOUT JANUARY 6TH.
WHAT DO YOU DO, YOU GO TO
HAPPY HOUR?
AND TALK ABOUT IT?
I DON’T BELIEVE THEM AND I HOPE
FOR THEIR SAKE IT IS NOT TRUE.
THAT MAKES ME SAD.
>> Greg: THE THING IS PTSD IS
REAL.
THERE IS NO DOUBT THEY WERE
SHAKING UP ABOUT SOME OF THE
THINGS THAT THIS IS AN
APPROPRIATION LIKE GOING BACK TO
WHAT DOUGLAS SAID DESPITE BEING
BRITISH, HE IS CORRECT.
[LAUGHTER]
I WENT ON THE SIDE AND FORGOT
THE POINT I WAS GOING TO MAKE.
>> APPROPRIATING DRAMA.
>> Greg: APPROPRIATING DRAMA
IS A PHENOMENON, A MODERN
PHENOMENON TO TALK ABOUT
YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU MIGHT GET A
BOOK DEAL OUT OF IT TOO FOR A
GIG AT CNN.
>> WERE NOT SUPPOSED TO WANT
PTSD.
>> DON’T YOU REMEMBER THE COPS
TESTIFYING, THIS IS A WHOLE NEW
THING.
IT HAS TO BE, I HAVE PTSD AND
THEY HAVE THOSE COPS TESTIFYING
IN EVERY SINGLE ONE CRIED.
WHAT?
I DIDN’T EXPECTED TO APPEAR THEY
WERE PUSHING AND I WAS PUSHING
BACK.
>> WE HAVE GOT TO MOVE ON.
>> Greg: THAT WAS THE FIRST
TIME I SAW CNN SYMPATHETIC WITH
THE POLICE, RIGHT?
IT WAS SOMETHING THEY COULD NAIL
ADMINISTRATION FOR A PERIOD UP