We'll be traveling chocolate bar salesmen.
What are they selling? Chocolates! Chocolates?
Ah, ha ha!
No no, please don’t hurt us!
CHOCOLATE!
Thank you for your patronage.
Hi Mailman!
Okay. See you tomorrow.
Hey, the mail’s here!
What’d you get?
Hey a magazine!
That's funny.
I don't remember subscribing to Fancy Living Digest.
Give me that.
Stealing my mail.
You're lucky I don't report you to the authorities.
Hey Squidward. How do the people in that magazine.
Get all that money.
They're entrepreneurs.
They sell things to people. Now keep your hands off my mail.
That’s it, Patrick! We got to become entrepreneurs.
Is that gonna hurt?
Quick Patrick, without thinking!
If you could have anything in the world right now, what would it be?
A chocolate bar?
That's a great idea, Pat.
We'll be traveling.
Chocolate bar salesman.
Fancy living.
Here we come.
Good afternoon, sir.
Could we interest you in some? Chocolate.
Chocolate?
Chocolate!? Chocolat?!
Chocolate!
Choc-
Okay. The first guy didn't count.
This is our real first step.
Good morning, sir.
Would you like to buy some chocolate?
Chocolate bars? Yes, sir.
We are chocolate bar salesmen.
Well, no self-respecting
candy bar salesman would be caught dead without one of these.
Wow. What is it?
It's a candy bar bag, you knucklehead.
It's specially designed a cradle each candy bar in velvet lined comforts.
But I'm wasting my time.
You don't need these bags.
We need ‘em! We need ’em!
Fancy living, here we come! La la la la la!
Let's try next door.
Yes. Huh?
Say, weren’t you
The same guy who sold us these candy bar bags?
I don't recall.
But it looks to me like you fellows have got a lot of bags there.
You two lady killers are too smart to be without one of my patented
candy bar bag carrying bags.
We’ll take 20.
You can understand what we're doing wrong.
There must be something to this selling game that we're just not getting.
Other people do it.
I mean, look at that! Eat barnacle chips.
They're delicious.
They are most certainly not delicious.
Not the way I use ‘em!
Yet they sell millions of bags a day.
Well, maybe if they didn't stretch the truth,
they wouldn't sell as many. That’s it, Patrick.
We've got to stretch the truth!
CHOCOLATE!
Yes. Hello, young lady.
We're selling chocolate.
Is your mother home? Mom.
What? What’s all that yelling!?
You just can’t wait for me to die, can you?!
They're selling chocolate. Chocolate?
What? What are they selling? Chocolate!
What? Chocolate!
I can’t hear you!
They’re selling chocolate!
They’re selling chocolate? Yeah!
Chocolate.
I remember when they first invented chocolate.
sweet, sweet chocolate.
I always HATED it.
Oh, but this chocolate’s not for eating. It’s for....
You rub it on your skin,
And it makes you live forever.
Live forever you say? I’ll take one!
Come on you Lazy Mary.
Start rubbing me with that chocolate.
I hate you.
If we keep exaggerating, the truth will be fancy living in no time.
Hooray for lying!
They make you fly!
You’ll walk through walls!
You’ll rule the world!
What can I do for you boys?
Hello.
Would you like to buy a chocolate bar?
We need an operation.
Really? Small world.
I was born with glass, bones and paper skin.
Every morning I break my legs, and every afternoon I break my arms at night.
I lie awake in agony until my heart attacks put me to sleep.
Oh, no.
Oh! Quick, Patrick.
Let's help him.
Careful. Put him down gently.
Oh, poor, poor man.
If there's anything, any thing we can do to help you.
There is one thing you can well imagine.
My medical bills are extremely high, but luckily, I'm able to keep myself alive
by selling chocolate bars.
Such nice boys.
It does my heart good to con a couple of class A
Suck-A-Rooney's like those two.
Don't get me wrong, Patrick, It's great that we help that guy out,
but there is no one left in town to sell chocolate bars to.
Oh, no.
Let's change our names to why and bother
CHOCOLATE!
finally.
I’ve been trying to catch you boys ALL DAY!
Now that I've got you right where I want you,
I'd like to buy all your chocolate.
Thank you for your patronage.
Good evening, sir.
Table for one, please.
Sorry, but the whole restaurant has been rented to a private party.
But it's my only night to be fancy.
Oh, who can afford to rent out the whole restaurant.
Oh, a couple of rich entrepreneurs and the dates.
So how long have you two ladies known each other?
WHAT?! WHAT DID HE SAY?