Wow.
It's a lot of wooing.
Yeah.
And I know why.
You are-- you are one of the top five,
if not the top director coming out of India right now,
which is no small feat, given how much incredible talent
there is between Bollywood and the streaming platforms
and independent cinema.
I'm also biased. - And the South cinema.
KAL PENN: And the South cinema, of course.
Yes. KAL PENN: I sort of--
I mean, you're in America, so everybody views
it as the whole subcontinent. - Yeah, yeah.
But I think--
well, I'm biased, because we've also been friends for years.
Yes.
You've had me over to your home for dinner when--
Do you remember that night?
Yes, I do. Of course, I do.
[laughter]
Are we gonna share that night?
Yeah.
What do you remember about that night?
I remember that my dog almost killed himself on--
[laughter]
My dog attacked the Brie from your plate.
Yes, the-- I did have Brie on my plate.
And choked.
It was very-- yeah, and then you had to like--
And he choked, and then I was like, my dog's gonna die.
My dog's gonna die. Boogie's gonna die.
And it was like Kal standing there staring,
and what's going on?
And then my assistant flipped him around and he was--
[laughter]
But not before--
not before he inadvertently bit you, right?
And then you had to call your vet to be like,
do I need rabies injections?
No.
He was like, freaking out because he was choking.
KAL PENN: I didn't say he bit you on purpose.
And I was trying to like-- yeah.
[laughter] - It was a--
It was very scary.
It was a chaotic night.
- Yeah. - Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, I feel like that goes hand in hand
with going to Mumbai.
It's like beautiful chaos that will follow you everywhere.
The Bollywood press has always been very kind to me.
They're also super dramatic, which I secretly love.
ZOYA AKHTAR: Are you talking about the paps?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. ZOYA AKHTAR: Yeah.
And there was one, I remember, we did this press
junket for something.
And they said, sir, some clicks.
So I was like, OK.
Take some photos.
And I remember just going like this.
And there was a couch behind me.
And this guy goes, please do some pose.
[laughter]
And I was like, what kind of pose do you want me to do?
Just lie down, like this.
[laughter]
And I'm like, bro, I can't.
He goes, the picture will be everywhere.
I'm like, I know.
That's why I can't lie down like that.
So do you have any really good Bollywood paparazzi stories?
Yeah.
I mean, they are--
they're actually really sweet.
You know what I mean?
They're not that invasive in that sense.
But they will say very random things.
Like I'll get off a car and they'll
be like, ma'am, full length.
Give me full length.
I'm like, how can-- this is my length.
This is it.
I can't give you anymore.
So it's stuff like that.
But they are al--
I have actually been at an event where I fell down.
And I was like, please don't put this out.
And they were like, we won't. And they didn't.
KAL PENN: Awesome.
So yeah, they're very sweet.
KAL PENN: Till tonight, and now the pictures
are gonna come out. [laughter]
Yeah. No, they are very--
I mean, look.
Very sweet.
Anyone who refers to Nick Jonas as Jijaji is doing well,
I think, in our book.
A resume as diverse as yours, I'm
curious what drew you to an adaptation of a comic
like The Archies?
I mean, Netflix offered it to me.
And I grew-- [laughter]
KAL PENN: Good reason. - That's a good start.
Yeah.
[cheers and applause]
Pretty baller response, by the way.
That's great.
No.
I grew up-- I mean, it's crazy that something
so fundamentally American was also
fundamentally a part of an urban Indian kid's childhood.
KAL PENN: Yeah.
And I grew up in the '80s, and India wasn't liberalized
at that time.
And so there was-- we didn't have access to as much stuff
that we do today.
And Archie was one of the few things that everybody read,
and it was a portal to this country.
So everybody-- it was like-- and we were 8 and 10,
and we just wanted this teenage life, in this fictional place
called Riverdale.
And everybody grew up thinking, that's America.
And then, I mean, obviously, then we grew up and realized
that's not America.
But when it came to me, it was also at a time
when I thought that it would be nice to do
something like a return to innocence, you know?
And it was kind of beautiful that it came to India,
because it was so special.
And they wanted the industry in India
to make it for the world.
And yeah, I just couldn't say no.
It was also like something to go back to,
a less-is-more time.
Yeah.
KAL PENN: Yeah.
Well, it's a beautiful film. - Thank you.
I highly recommend it.
One of my favorite scenes was between Dilton and Reggie.
Yes.
It's this very special scene about friendship at a time--
I don't want to ruin the whole thing, but you know,
Dilton's character is sort of scared to come
out to his friends.
And the friendship with Reggie is kind of codified.
ZOYA AKHTAR: Yeah.
KAL PENN: I guess, two questions for you on that.
What made you want to write a scene like that?
And then, part of the reason I ask that is, you know,
my partner Josh and I had been tracking the Indian Supreme
Court decision.
Obviously very disappointed by the marriage
equality decision.
But you know, why and how do you
infuse these inclusive stories in India right now?
I mean, stories are very important.
Yeah.
And I mean, India has a very, very vibrant LGBT community.
And 2018, homosexuality was decriminalized.
And there's been so much change,
and real positive change with that.
And it's gonna keep evolving.
And part of that evolution is storytelling and filmmaking.
And somewhere, I feel it's not just like, oh,
we're representing something.
But you're putting people into--
you're taking someone and putting
them in someone else's shoes.
You're humanizing the other.
You're just making people come closer.
Like stories travel, and stories stay longer.
And I don't know.
They just, they move you and shift you.
And I think it's--
I'm lucky to be part of that community that can affect
some kind of evolution or change,
and represent, and be there, and say how I feel.
Your--
[cheers and applause]
How sweet is this sound?
Very sweet.
Yeah.
But also, that inclusivity is obviously noticed.
And people love it, especially when
it's such a great form of-- included in such
a great form of storytelling.
You worked with your dad and your brother on this movie.
Both of them are multi-hyphenates.
Yes.
I am terrified at the prospect of working
with my parents on anything.
Mostly because when I did Van Wilder way back in the day
with Ryan Reynolds, I showed my mom the script
and she screamed, this is pornography.
[laughter]
Because there was one nude scene in it, which wasn't me.
That time.
But I'm curious, what was it like working with your dad
and your brother?
I mean, this is not-- this is like my fifth
film that they are on.
They work on my work in some capacity or the other.
And it's safe, and also the most dangerous.
Because, I mean, it's an honest space,
so you will get the truth.
But that's dangerous sometimes, because that leads
to fights at the dinner table.
But they're both incredibly talented men,
and I am supremely lucky to have that resource,
as is my mother.
She's a writer as well.
So between the fa-- we all write.
KAL PENN: Yeah.
So it's pretty manic.
Dinner is manic.
[laughter]
Sounds like you can't leave your work at home.
No.
Last couple of questions I've just got to ask,
because I'm a huge Bollywood fan.
Like you are-- you've worked in all these different mediums.
Top three favorite people that you
would want to work with again? - Again.
- Yeah. - Oh, wow.
Or I guess, for the first time.
OK. Again.
Let me just take again. That'll be easier.
KAL PENN: That's safer, yeah.
I think I'm going to take the actors I've worked with,
so I think Hrithik Roschon. [cheers and applause]
Yeah. KAL PENN: Yeah.
For sure, I'm dying to work with him again, Farhan Akhtar.
I haven't worked with him.
And Ranvier Singh.
KAL PENN: Yeah. - Yeah.
[cheers and applause]
I want to put two of them in a movie.
I mean, could you do four?
I mean, I'm available. - Happily.
[laughter] Yes.
Would you-- by the way, this is now
just strictly for my paycheck.
Would you do like a Bollywood adaptation
of Harold and Kumar? - I'd love to.
KAL PENN: You would love to.
I would love to. KAL PENN: Let's make--
[cheers and applause]
I would love to.
That would be really fun.
It would be huge.
KAL PENN: I mean, I meant it as a half joke.
But if we're serious, we should talk backstage.
- Yeah. - That's the whole--
We should talk. KAL PENN: OK.
All right. I'm down for this.
[cheers and applause]
The Archies is streaming worldwide on Netflix.
Zoya Akhtar, everybody.