This video may shock you. This video will leave a lot of people asking a lot of questions.
This video will be different than any other Mac video that I've every Mac-ed. This video will leave
a bunch of Macaries
Macaries?
Can I call you macaries? What who?
Fuck that. This video will leave a lot of people wondering what happened.
This video might kill you!
If it does, I'm very sorry. I don't know how the fuck that-
But today is the very first video that I am filming...
In my new apartment!
*mac mating call*
She a bit bare, she a bit empty right now, this second on this day of God. Jesus?
Hopefully that will change soon. And by soon I mean at least not like three months.
But I feel kind of adult now. I feel like I step my pussy up ya know?
Now I have space! I wonder how long we're gunna be able to afford this!
(overlapping male voice: Daddy x3) There's a wet bar! I think that's what is called. I don't know. Some one told me.
But a bitch got an office, still got a roommate, cause I might have some YouTube money but I ain't stupid, ok?
Like my pussy stepped up. Like my man-gina is now sky high. (Lady Gaga oh-ing)
Like bitch, you can't touch me.
She got a condo now, she condo fit.
And what a better way to break in this new apartment than to do something stupid!
LIT
So there's a thing that's going around on the internet, or it was, I don't know-
Are people still doing it? Am I behind? I think I'm behind.
Where people are going around and turning themselves into Bratz dolls?
Now, I've never actually watched these videos
Cuz I'm terrible at YouTube, apparently?
All I've seen are just like a bunch of thumbnails of people doing it
and I'm like that seems cool. So today I'm gonna do it
♪ Ass! Titties! ♪
Also should I be more of a commentary channel?
This is like off-topic. My mind is going 500 words a minute. (honestly same)
I just got a new apartment.
I'm excited.
A lot of youtubers are like gaining a lot of traction doing commentary
and a lot of them are white but that's a different int--
Who knew that the one thing we love on the Internet is watching a straight white male rip other people to shreds
because they don't do things that fit their standards.
*mac™ gasp of realisation*
I did not!
This apartment changed me bitch, I'm different.
But you know, this is like a full out commentating channel right now, let's start.
Heeey guuuys, BRATZ dolls!
*mac questioning his sanity*
How the FUCK do they do this? Bratz doll? more like... BITCHES!
Is this the part where I say the n-word?
♪ Ass n' titties! ♪
This is Sasha.
I bought her,
she is mine.
Wait, pause.
I'm also right next to an alley so like, garbage trucks drive by.
I purposely picked Sasha for reasons
I feel like I don't have to explain in 2019.
Come out girl, with consent, WITH CONSENT, can I touch you, am I allowed to touch you?
(we love a man that asks for consent because that’s THE LAW)
Hello? Sorry, I just got packages delivered and I totally forgot I was gonna get them.
Imagine I was like halfway through this video full face of makeup and I get a fucking knock at my door.
That would have been a video, god damn it.
I should have started this earlier. Imagine me trying to answer the door lookin like a cracked-out Bratz doll
That would have been a video, that would have been viral. Probably not, no one gives a shit about me.
♪Big booty bitches ♪
Where were we? Sasha! Yes, that girl. Here she is, she...
Honestly Rihanna is shaking
and today we're gonna try to draw this space onto my face without even seeing a single fucking video on
how to do it, like I'm so stupid. Why did I do this? Literally this morning
I realized I haven't seen a single video of someone doing this actually and I just said I'm gonna do it anyway, so...
I'm sorry but let's do it. First we need makeup, bitch. Okay. Wait, I probably don't even need to make my lips bigger, bitch
Do you see me? Okay so, we should like outline, everything first, then fill it in. 'Cause I'm not stupid.
I'm gonna do this as best as I can
I'm not gonna be weird about it- YEET- to be accomplished, to feel like I did shit in my life
I'm a bigger apartment bitch now. I need to act like it, you know?
♪ Titties! ♪
Should we put primer on our face?
We should like beauty guru the shit out of ourself. Someone recently yelled at me telling me
I put on way too much primer on the last time, so I'm going to only put on HALF.
♪ Oooooooh ♪
There we go. Okay. Should we also
foundation ourselves? Is this just a beauty channel now? Bitch!
♪ Bitches ♪
This is like called the base. Right? Like I'm doing the base. Okay.
How...
am I
supposed to...?
EYES.
*more mac™ silence*
You sure, bitch?! I have like a liquid shit. But here I have a liquid eyeliner in black, negro, nor-ear!
First off, why is there, so much happening, like bitch, we get it you love art, you're a guru.
You make a million dollars a month. I don't have a mirror. So I'm gonna be looking...
Where I'm always looking on my videos. There's nothing new. BOW- bitch!
*beep*
ueEEeeehhhhh
♪ Titties♪
Sure. Flicking the bitch out. This eye’s fucked. And then we got some lip action shit, it goes like...
BITCH, I might have done SOMEthing, okay.
[Computer voice] "No you didn't."
Maybe she born with it. Maybe she needs help.
♪ Titties ♪
For this special occasion, I bought some white eyeshadow?
Which is like, what I think you need? This is such a, such a filler video, bitch.
Now, it trended and here I am.
I got no-be-oh-be-oh...
(wat)
Shit. I don't know. So I'm just gonna like, put this in the middle of the eyes if that's what we want to call them.
Yeah..yeah! She doing something.
Sometimes ya know.
When she feels like it.
There we go.
BITCH I might've done something. Wait a minute.
Okay, so there's pupils.
BOW BOW
Okay.
BOW BOW. BITCH! Bitch.
Bi-, it's something. It's something. Okay, bitch. Then her eyes are like, greenish. Which is like, very rare on a black person. Probably not,
I'm probably just ignorant.
♪ Titties ♪
I don't have any. Oh yes I do bitch! Yes I do!
Almost said I didn't have any green but bitch, she a beauty guru. She has everything now.
*valley girl voice* Next thing you want to do is put on the green underneath the eye and like...
Fuck yeah.
*screaming*
OK! You're doing something, bitch something's happening.
[Creepy, low voice] NO!
'Kay now we...
*beauty guru mac™ questions his sanity for the ninth time*
I don't fucking know.
She has like this weird tracer thing like around her eye. I think that's what James Charles called cutting the crease.
So we're gonna fucking cut that shit.
*James Charles woomp woomp wOoOoMP*
K
BOW BOW BOW BOW BOW
And now...
The fuck is that. Whoever knew she was a beauty guru all along? Now she has like this a little bit.
Got some of this going on. Okay. Now the eyebrows. Now we gotta do the eyebrows. I got a Maybelline shaping stick?
I don't know what the FUCK that means. (me neither)
♪ Titties ♪
Bitch x5
Don't act like... Her name is Shasha now. A high selling doll bitch. She did something. She went to art school, you know.
Eyelashes!
So we gotta. Here we go.
♪ Ooh. Baby. ♪
Bam! Bam! Okay. Sure.
I had lip liner?!
♪ Titties ♪
Fuck me.
Let's use the lip liner now to line the fucking lip. We can fill the lips in with this actually wait a minute.
Okay, okay.
Bitch she pretty. You ready for the ball?
*loud laughter*
I really thought this was gonna be a really great video idea and that I was gonna do this like kind of well...
(that... happened?)
When is the day I'm going to realize I have NO talent?
LIT
She has a lot of hair. I don't have, any wig, all I have is...
I'm just gonna show you.
*beep*
Who?! Wait, let me put on a jacket.
*beep*
*yet even more mac silence™*
Who?
♪ Bratz girls! Going down the street! Eating all the bitches that you meet! Bratz gir- ♪
What's the theme song?
♪ Oooooh! She a Bratz doll! Ooh woo woo woo ♪
♪ She a Brat ♪
I look like a Tiffany!
'Kay, well, I don't know what else to do with this video.
This is kind of a bust. This was faster than I thought it was gonna be. What did we learn today, kids?
(that mac makes a great bratz doll and editing captions is hard)
I don't think we learned SHIT. This video was kind of a bust, I am sorry.
I just wanted to do this really bad and here it is...
I really thought I was gonna do kind of a decent job. I thought it looked so easy in the thumbnails.
Let me watch one of the videos. Oh, okay, so I was wrong, they don't put the eyes UNDERNEATH their eyes,
they put the eyes OVER their eyes.
♪ Titties ♪
I don't have anything to wash my face off...
I- There's nothing in this apartment like I'm literally stuck like this I literally have...
My name is Mac and don't forget to like, comment, share, and subscreebae. BWAH!!
[robotic male voice:]♪ This is the part where the ending music plays. (Yas queen) ♪
[robotic male voice] ♪ This is the part where the ending music plays (Slay it mama) ♪
[robotic male voice] ♪ This is the part where the ending music plays. (Yas queen) ♪
[robotic male voice] ♪ This is the part where the ending music plays (Slay it) ♪
[robotic male voice] ♪ This is the part where the ending music plays. (Skrt skrt) ♪
[robotic male voice] ♪ This is the part... Bitch... where the ending music plays. ♪
(you made it this far, well done <3)