President Trump.
For once, he is in the White House,
and he's doing some French kissing.
All eyes on the high-stakes meetings
between the French and American presidents.
French President Emmanuel Macron has arrived in America
for the first state visit hosted by President Trump.
Mr. Trump rolling out the red carpet,
a military welcome on the South Lawn,
followed by a series of meetings,
a joint press conference,
and an elaborate state dinner.
Yay!
It's President Trump's first state dinner.
And if you don't know, a state dinner
is basically a full, formal evening.
The president hosts the event at the White House,
and it's in honor of a visiting foreign leader.
It's very lavish. You know, it's usually black tie,
although I guess in Trump's case,
it might just be long tie.
Now, it's no accident
that the French president is getting the honor
of being Trump's first state dinner guest,
because from the very beginning,
while other leaders seemed to clash with Trump,
Macron was the Belle to Trump's Beast.
Macron has been dubbed the Trump whisperer by some
because of their close diplomatic relationship.
Syria will also be a focus of these discussions.
It was Macron who convinced President Trump
to take action inside that country.
Macron says he and Trump have a special relationship.
Mr. President, they're all saying
what a great relationship we have,
and they're actually correct.
It's not fake news.
Finally, it's not fake news.
Look how excited Little Donny is, man.
Doesn't-doesn't he look like he just invited his best friend
over for a sleepover? It's actually cute.
Yeah.
It really is.
They might even play Truth or Dare.
Be like, "Okay, my turn, dare me to sleep with your wife."
(French accent): "Uh, how about we do truth instead?"
"Okay, truth, I want to sleep with your wife."
Now, all this fun aside,
Macron didn't fly across the Atlantic just to hang out.
He came to Washington on a very specific mission:
to stop Trump from doing something dumb.
REPORTER: Macron will spend two days with President Trump
on what some have called Operation Save the Iran Deal.
As Macron and other European allies have pointed out,
there is no starting over, really,
once this Iran deal is scrapped.
It becomes virtually impossible to get Iran back to the table
and get all the other parties back to the table.
Now, you see, that would be bad news.
This deal is the only reason
that Iran is not advancing its nuclear program.
If America backs out,
it'll even further destabilize the Middle East.
So this is really sticky for Macron,
because he has to try and save the Iran deal
while also making it seem like Trump is getting what he wants.
Yeah. It's like America's real drunk right now
and Macron is its wingman.
You know? America's just like, "I'm gonna kick Iran's ass!"
Like, "Yeah, you did, man. You did.
You already kicked their ass, buddy. You kicked their ass."
"You're goddamn right I did. I won. I wo..."
(retching)
"MAGA!"
Now, getting Donald Trump to do the right thing
is, as we all know, virtually impossible.
Right? Fortunately, Macron, he, uh...
he seems to have the recipe for handling Trump.
Because, you see, before Macron became president,
he was an investment banker,
so he's an expert in dealing with egotistical rich people.
Like, for example, for example, watch how he plays along
as Trump shows off his amazing president technology.
REPORTER: President Trump gave Macron a personal tour
of the Oval Office, pointing out his phone to Mrs. Macron.
Yes.
(chuckles)
Oh, that one. This one.
(laughter)
Like,
Macron is acting the way an adult does
when a kid shows them around their playroom.
He's like, "Wow, Donald, the phone.
Can you talk to people on it?"
And he's like, "Uh-huh!"
"And you remember all the numbers?"
"Nuh-uh, General Kelly pushes them for me."
"Oh, and, tell me, Donald, do you go potty like a big boy?"
"Yeah, but my friends in Russia go potty on the bed."
Now, it's one thing to admire Trump's phone,
but the ultimate test is how you handle it
when he publicly humiliates you.
It's a great honor, great honor to be here.
But we do have a very special relationship.
In fact, I'll get that little piece of dandruff off.
-(shutters clicking rapidly) -Little piece.
We have to make him perfect. He is perfect.
So it is really, uh...
it is really great to be with you.
And you are a special friend. Thank you.
-Thank you. -Thank you.
Yo, yo, this dude,
this dude just picked something white off Macron's shoulder
and then announced it to dandruff.
Like, he just announced it as dandruff to the cameras.
Like, "Look, look. I found a dandruff. I found it."
And credit to Macron, he just went with it.
Yeah. That's diplomacy.
Because if I was Macron, I would have clapped back.
He would have been like, "You got dan..."
I would have been like, (French accent): "Excuse me.
I have dandruff. No, Donald. You are a human dandruff!"
(laughter)
"You are the flakes on the scalp of society!
I shampoo you from my life!"
(laughter)
But he was calm. He handled it perfectly.
In fact, every moment Macron handled perfectly.
You know, whether it was giving speeches,
or playing outside, you could really feel
that Macron was connecting with Trump.
And we all know that Trump is not the sentimental type,
but clearly, Macron made him feel the way
that he's never, ever felt before-- human.
(applause)
Thank you.
(kissing)
Thank you.
I like him a lot.
That's my prediction.
-It's only a prediction. -(laughs)
Thank you. Thank you very much.
(laughter)
Look, like, I... I know it's... I know it's a cliché,
but that's a bromance.
(laughter)
Like, that's more affection than he's ever shown Melania.
Yeah, you know she doesn't care
because she knows where those hands have been, but still...
(laughter, groaning)
Now, the big question is, will Macron's visit
actually help change America's policy toward Iran?
Well, maybe and maybe not.
But we have definitely seen a slight change in policy
in Trump's heart. Yeah.
Which is why we've decided
to honor this beautiful relationship
through the magic of le cinéma.
(movie projector whirring)
(whimsical instrumental music plays)
(cymbal crashes)
(laughter)
(laughter, applause and cheering)