In "show must go on" news,
a Russian singer, Anastasia...
I'd like to buy a vowel. Something.
Uh, long last name. Went viral.
She fell off the stage during a show.
But she lived, so we can, um, laugh about the video.
Uh, she fell ten feet into the pit,
and she kept singing.
♪ ♪
You're getting close.
You're getting... Whoa!
(laughter)
(singing in Russian)
(laughter)
She's like an angel.
Straight from heaven.
She's like, "I hope no one noticed."
SPADE: Yeah.
But nobody... That looked like a suicide attempt.
Nobody...
-SPADE: She really... -Just walked straight off the edge
-of the stage. -"Coronavirus is not gonna take me out.
-I'm going out first." -Yeah, she... "I'll go first."
The show must go on,
and she must go on to the hospital.
She... By the way, no idea where the edge was.
Not, like, inching towards...
She's like... (holds note)
And... (imitates thud)
No, but that dress was very big.
-Oh, it blocked her view. -It's like when you get fat
-and you lose your dick for a few months. -SPADE: Yeah.
(laughter and applause)
We've all been there.
Been there, done that. Been there, done that.
I hate when I lose weight and I still can't see it.
I'm like, "What's happening?"
Peekaboo.
I-I like that she kept singing, though.
That's the good bit, that she kept singing.
Maybe she wasn't singing.
Maybe that's just what Russians sound like in pain.
-Like, we have no reference point. -Yeah. (squawks)
(Russian accent): 'Cause in Russia,
stage dives on you.
I think... (laughs)
-What? -I think she's a bot account.
-She's a bot. -SPADE: She's a bot.
Oh, that could be a bot. We've had some call...
-Could be a bot. -We have more of these.
We have great videos of wipeouts.
We've got... Oh, no, we have Paula Abdul on this one.
This is... Check this one out.
♪ From mistakes... ♪
SPADE: Okay, Paula, careful.
Don't go straight down.
-Here we go. Oh! -Oh!
Paula, then it was light out.
-Wow. -Straight up.
Yeah, she... (whistles)
-That was a tough one. -Yo.
Obviously, she was off-balance.
She was just clapping with one hand.
SPADE: That's true. That will...
That does something to your equilibrium.
Yeah. We have another one. What's this one?
There's a stripper who had a rough night on the pole.
Uh, there she is.
Bah, bah, bah, there she goes.
And look out. Look out below!
ALONZO: Oh!
Oh!
(laughter and applause)
Oh!
-Oh! -Look at that.
-Oh, my God! -Oh, yeah.
-Right back to making them clap. -Yo.
-Oh, yeah. -J.Lo would have been nominated for that Oscar.
Oh, yeah, that's right. That...
I was there that night. She's fine.
(laughter and applause)
Question.
Did your erection strengthen or weaken when it happened?
(laughter)
-Up. -SPADE: Yeah.
What happens when a stripper gets injured, though?
There's, like... Is there, like, a second-string stripper
that just goes in? Like, "Get in there."
"Off. Off the bench."
She's like, "I knew I shouldn't work on Crisco night."
Um, all right, one more.
This is, uh, moves from a singer in Mexico.
Uh, got the fancy footwork.
Caliente. Here we go. Moonwalk.
There. Whoa, whoa, oh!
ALONZO: Oh!
(laughter)
-Oh! -All right, see, that bring...
Like, do we need a wall
or a moat?
(laughter)
Uh...
(laughs)
I didn't mean to look at you.
Um, a wall, 'cause we swim.
(laughs)
But I will say, I-I think that looks like Juan Gabriel,
and, if you guys don't know him,
I-I refuse to ever speak ill of Juan Gabriel,
-'cause he is like our Elvis Presley. -Yeah.
-ROCK: Really? -So I will get my Mexican card revoked
if I ever did that.
-Sí, se puede. -But I have no problem.
(laughing)
And you'll throw in Elvis, too. Yeah.
That didn't look like coronavirus.
That liked like too many Coronas.
All right, so you guys are all comics.
Have you ever had to keep performing
if someone got a little feisty in the audience?
-Jim? -No.
(laughs) Jim.
We have a clip.
Let's see what happens.
When you-- Oh, hang on.
(gasping)
Wait, wait, wait!
(shouting)
SPADE: Chaos!
H-Hang on, hang on! Hang on.
You said you'd play three seconds.
(laughing)
Three punches.
(applause)
Isn't that crazy? That's him.
Where was that?
It was a bad gig. It was...
It was funny, 'cause my-my son's never seen anything
that I've done on TV or anything like that.
He's never seen anything I've done.
-But my son's addicted to watching fails. -Yeah.
And I was on one of the fails on the...
That was one of the main fails of-of some year.
And my son just walks upstairs-- I'm in the shower-- like,
"Dad, you're famous."
SPADE: Oh, you made it.
"You're a fail."
And, like, when you're naked, I'm like,
"Yeah, you're gonna have the same problem as well, mate, eh?"
That is hilarious.
(applause)
Well...
I-- he didn't swing by the merch table after and buy anything?
He didn't-- he didn't heckle.
He just came up. That's why, if you watch the beginning of it,
I go, "Oh, hang on, mate," because I was gonna adjust it
with conversation. I was gonna go,
"Oh, you're not allowed up here."
He just-- The guy didn't like this-- the routine,
and he put his drink down and then just ran up onstage
and punched me. And the Comedy Store in Manchester
politely had put some stairs up to the stage,
-which really... -Yeah.
-Easier to get to you? -Yeah. That really helped.
Well, I wouldn't know what's going on.
Wait a minute. Like, really? Not-not one heckle?
-That's his heckle? -No he-- no heckle from him.
Nothing from him. No, he just--
He was on a first date. The girl was not having a good time,
and his brain panicked and went, "(bleep), I'll sort this out."