Yesterday, Seattle was awarded an NHL hockey team.
That's the whitest sentence I've ever said.
What about this sentence?
"O.M.G.
I've just spilled a pumpkin spice latte in my Prius."
(laughter and applause)
Not bad. Not bad.
Anyway, there's a lot of other sports news,
so let's go to Roy Wood, Jr. and Michael Kosta
for another edition of
I Apologize For Talking While You Were Talking. (exhales)
♪ ♪
(cheers and applause)
Yeah. What's up, everyone?
I'm Roy Wood, Jr., and it's time to catch up
on the world of sports.
Let's start with football and a major off-field fumble
by one of the greats.
TV REPORTER: One of the NFL's most recognizable stars,
Hall of Fame quarterback Brett Favre,
says he was duped into making this video.
Brett Favre here with a shout-out.
TV REPORTER: A short recorded message coded
with anti-Semitic statements.
Favre says he was told what he was reading
was paid for by veterans.
It was instead tied
to a hate group operating on the dark web.
TV REPORTER: That video was made with the website called Cameo.
It's a new platform which allows people
to hire celebrities to record personalized shout-outs.
Favre announcing that he and Cameo would donate
that $500 he received to charity.
This makes no sense.
Why would anti-Semites spend $500 on Favre,
when they can get Mel Gibson to record a video for free?
That's true. This-this Cameo business is crazy.
These celebs that make these videos, to me,
they just seem desperate and sad and small-minded...
Actually, that-that reminds me.
No. No, Roy.
Hey, what's up? It's Roy Wood, Jr.
I want to tell my man Phil, happy prostate exam, man.
-happy prostate exam, man. -No, Roy.
Do your thing, bro.
Hope you have a good prostate exam, bro.
Tell me you got paid a lot for that.
-20 bucks. Anyway... -20 bucks?
Let's move on from football to the beautiful game.
The sport the whole world plays.
-Casual sexism. -Correct.
Now to the international outrage after a female soccer superstar
was asked a question many say was shockingly sexist.
TV REPORTER: A historic night for Norwegian Ada Hegerberg,
winning the award for the best
women's soccer player in the world.
Regrettably, Hegerberg's moment in the spotlight
was seemingly spoiled
by the French deejay Martin Solveig,
who was on stage with her and asked if she knew how to perform
a certain provocative dance to celebrate.
TV REPORTER: A question no man would get:
"Do you twerk?”
-No. -(men laughing)
SOLVEIG: Okay, I don't want to-- What I said was...
Fellas, fellas, pro tip:
"Do you twerk?" is never
-an appropriate question anywhere. -Right.
Even if you're hosting a show
-honoring the best strippers in Atlanta. -Right.
I mean, honestly, I'm surprised she didn't just slap him.
Well, she's a soccer player, Roy.
She can't use her hands.
-So... -(laughter)
But it is true.
I mean, nobody would ever ask Lionel Messi to twerk,
even though everyone in the whole world wants to see it.
I mean, whoa.
(sighs) It's like he's looking at me right now, isn't it?
Is twerking even still a thing, Roy?
Are you asking me 'cause I'm black?
Yeah.
-Thought so. -Yeah, okay.
Let's wrap things up like we always do,
with our play of the week.
Roy, we've literally never had a play of the week.
-Roll the tape. -But...
We don't usually show a whole lot of soccer highlights,
even though Joe's a big soccer fan,
but we came across one play you just have to see.
Here you can see the goalie getting ready
to punt the ball downfield, except he kicks it
right at the back of an opposing player.
Right? Then right before the ball is set
to bounce into his own goal,
that flurry blur right there is a dog.
How the dog got onto the field, nobody really knows,
but he or she definitely deserves a treat,
depending on who you're rooting for.
I mean, where did she come from?
-It's like, "What-What's that, Lassie? -(barks)
-Someone's about to score a goal? -(barking)
-Go stop it, girl. Go stop it. -(barking)
Now, should that goal have counted?
And I say, who cares?
The important question is, can that dog twerk?
Still not okay. That's all for now. I'm Roy Wood Jr.
(gruff voice): I'm Michael Kosta.
This is how we talk now, huh?
That's not how we talk.