CALVIN ROBERSON: Hi, guys.
Pastor Cal, hello.
Hi, Pastor Carl.
Thank you for taking time to meet with us.
CALVIN ROBERSON: Absolutely, absolutely.
Johnny, you look a little sad.
I need you to talk to me.
What's bringing this emotion that you're feeling?
I'm sad because I feel like I'm married to someone
that is not right for me.
She's not genuine.
What is the side of me that you're saying is not genuine?
Because I need to know that, as your wife.
The thing that I'm seeing is that you're
presenting a certain version of yourself to whoever we're with.
And sometimes, that involves saying things
that I feel like are not true.
Like what, for example?
You said you've been trying really hard,
and you've been cooking gourmet meals for us.
I have.
We're cooking gourmet meals together.
We cook the salmon meal together.
I did the bouillonnaise recently.
I meal-prepped both of those things.
I also meal-prepped our Hawaiian thing.
I feel like I have to actually list
out every single thing I do.
But I am actually doing all those things, am I not?
CALVIN ROBERSON: Yeah, Johnny, is that the truth or no?
Is that a lie?
I feel like Bao's trying to take credit
for stuff that I think is--
CALVIN ROBERSON: Johnny. - Baseline.
CALVIN ROBERSON: Did she do those things or not?
We did those things together.
CALVIN ROBERSON: Johnny, here's the thing.
I'm going to be straight.
I don't think you're being fair.
I feel like you're saying she's making excuses.
I hear you making excuses.
And you're trying to find a way to discredit your relationship.
Are you sorry you signed up for this process?
OK.
Is there anyone else that you have some kind of affinity for,
outside of Bao?
I never even asked that question.
I never assumed there was anyone.
CALVIN ROBERSON: I'll tell you why I'm asking this.
Because in all my years of counseling people,
I can tell when someone's attention is divided,
and I can tell when someone is trying
to sabotage the situation.
I need you to be honest with me.
Is that the case?
What I know at this point is that there have been points
in this process where I feel like I wish I had been matched
with literally anyone else.
Because--
CALVIN ROBERSON: Now, not only is that mean--
You've said a lot of mean things.
You're not answering the question.
CALVIN ROBERSON: Johnny.
Johnny, you're not, though.
Johnny, you're not.
Is there someone else?
CALVIN ROBERSON: Johnny, come on, dude.
Johnny.
There's no one else, but I just
know that what I have in front of me right now
is not what I want.
I'm comparing Bao to the ideal person
that I thought I'd be married to,
and I'm constantly comparing her to that.
CALVIN ROBERSON: Now, Johnny, that is a sabotage.
That's impossible.
No one can live up to that standard!
Johnny, tell me that you're going
to push through these emotions, and find
the beauty of this woman.
That you're going to give it a shot.
I'm going to push through this and give this a shot.
CALVIN ROBERSON: OK.
Now, I need you to turn to her and tell her that.
We're going through, like, a hard time right now.
And I feel discouraged.
But I want to work on this, and I want to find the beauty
that could be here between us.
And I'm going to commit to it.
And I'm not going to run away, I'm not going
to continue to be negative.
I just want to appreciate the things that we do have,
and focus on what could be.
Thank you.
[music playing]
(SINGING) This is your heart to break.
This is your soul to take.