- Bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored, bored.
ahh, bored.
(farts,laughs)
Farts make everything better.
Wait, that wasn't my fart.
(grunts, farts)
(laughs)
- Yeah, beat that.
(grunts, farts)
- Ohh, that fart was tart.
(laughs)
- Hey, that looks like a real gas.
(laughs)
What are you doing?
- Uhh.
- Nothing.
- What do you mean, nothing?
Looks like your doing something.
- Nope, nope.
No, not doing anything.
- What's Fart Club then?
- What?
Uh fart, fart what?
What are you talking about?
- Fart Club, is that like a new dance club or something?
- Uh, excuse me, how do you know about Fart Club?
- What do you mean?
There's a poster right there.
- What?
- Dude, what are you doing?
A poster?
- What?
I'm just trying to get our numbers up.
- Gah, listen, were not doing anything.
Just leave us alone.
- What's Fart Club?
- There's no such thing.
- What's Fart Club?
- Doesn't exist.
- What's Fart Club?
- I'm not telling--
- What's Fart Club?
- I can't-- - What's Fart Club?
- Would you jus-- - What's Fart Club?
- Grr-- - What's Fart Club?
What's Fart Club? What's Fart Club
Wha, wha, wha, What's Fart Club?
- Gah, bro, the first rule of Fart Club is
you don't talk about Fart Club.
- Hmm, interesting.
I better tell Pear.
Hey, Pear, do you have five minutes to talk about Fart Club?
- Not really.
- Hey, what did I just say?
- I don't know, dude.
I have the attention span of a gerbil.
Speaking of which, I really need to get my gerbil waxed.
What were we talking about, again?
- We were talking about Fart Club.
- Dude, first rule!
- Whoops, sorry.
- Oh yeah, Fart Club.
So, as I was saying--
- Hey, you can't talk about Fart Club.
- Good.
- Ahh.
Well, can I sing about it?
- No.
- Can I interpretive dance about it?
- No.
- Oh, how about I freestyle rap about it?
- No.
- Ahh, come on, but I got mad beats!
- I'm so angry.
- Irrationally angry.
- What?
(laughs)
- Get it?
Mad beats?
- It's not funny.
(record scratches)
- Sorry, guys.
They didn't like the joke.
- [Both Beets] Ahh, man.
- Okay, so if rule one says we can't talk about Fart Club
then what's rule two?
- Rule number two is
you don't talk about Fart Club.
- What's that?
I can't hear you over all the redundancy .
- Ah, these rules aren't redundant.
They are set that way so that our club
retains it's secrecy and utmost integrity.
- For crying out loud, you guys just get together
and have fart battles.
- How'd he figure it out?
- Fart battles?
Sweet!
Where do I sign up?
I've got the toots that'll make you hoot.
(farts, laughs)
- Ha, whatever, bro.
Your farts fail in comparison to mine.
(grunts, farts)
- Whoa, that was a 7.8 on the sphincter scale.
- That's not a thing.
- Psh, whatever.
I can totally beat that.
- No way, I'm the fart champ, bro.
If you can beat me, I'll let you join Fart Club,
no questions asked.
- Deal.
(grunts, farts)
- Whoa, that was an 8.1 on the sphincter scale.
- Oh yeah.
(grunts, farts)
Boom.
(grunts, farts)
- 8.7 on the sphincter scale.
- This is literally the worst thing ever.
(grunts, farts)
- 8.9, 9.0 ,9.2, 9.4, 9.6.
- Ahh, I can taste everything.
- 9.7, 9.8, 9.9.
- I'm going for a 10.
Here it goes.
(grunts, farts)
- Wow, can the can register a 9.9?
Yes he can.
(laughs)
(screams)
Beans, don't mind if I do.
(laughs)
Welcome to your nightmare.
(laughs, farts)
(screams)
- It's over 9,000.
- No, the methane gas.
(sparks, explosion)
Dude, look what you've done.
You destroyed the entire kitchen.
- [Orange] I know, right?
Man I'm awesome.
- Characters that could never carry an entire episode.
- Nah, just leave it in the comments, negative Nancy.
- Fine, mean time I'm going to lurk nearby
until this blows up in your face and I can openly gloat.
(laughs)
- Sorry, that's just so you.
(cracking, grunting)
- Thank you muscly muscles.
I will kiss you in appreciation later.
(sniffs)
Whoo, very ripe down there.
Ahh.
- Ohh, hello there.
- Whoa, who's this kung-fool?
(laughs)
See that?
First pitch.