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Welcome back to my Dark Corner of this Sick World.
"Hiya space cadet" sign sporting one of the worst titles in movie history
Besides sporting one of the worst titles in movie history...
Monster A-Go Go is distinguished by the involvement of
Dark Corners favorite Herschell Gordon Lewis
"Got a job to do, I wouldn't want it."
Let me try and sum up how I felt while watching this movie.
"For the last 8 weeks, nothing has happened."
And when something does happen it makes no sense.
"We have a radioactive something or other."
That's pretty much the entire plot.
"Chalk me up as incompetent"
Now should say this film had a difficult history
The credited director is Bill Rebane who ran out of money halfway through shooting
"Try not to even think about it right now."
Lewis bought up the film four years later and completed it.
"I was trying to help."
But the gap does have an effect, some characters vanish
"and without question Douglas was gone without a trace."
While the actor playing Doctor Logan had changed so much in the intervening years
that he was forced to play his own brother.
"Good God, what happened to him?"
Good question. Before...
and after...
"They're almost identical."
You're kidding yourself mate.
On top of this, the monster of the title...
...barely appears.
"A monster? I don't know."
and I really struggle to see this story
"Over here!"
Or indeed, see anything.
Large chunks this movie seem to have been shot at night with no lighting what so ever.
"As if an eye had been blinked."
Or if an eye had been closed.
And if you're hoping the sound is better...
"How does this look Jim?"
-- inaudible voice over radio --
Well I hope that wasn't important information because I couldn't understand a word.
-- more inaudible voice over radio --
Sounds like he's talking to Flipper.
"Would you like dance?"
To what? There's no music.
"Oh, what is that all about?"
Genuinely the impression this film gives
is that someone watched 'The Creeping Terror'
And thought, 'well I can't match the quality of this masterpiece but...
'I could do something similar, only worse.'
"Absolutely unbelievable General."
Which I would not have thought possible.
"What changes the delicate interlocking of fate that determines life or death."
What you're left with is anonymous characters stumbling from scene to scene
interspersed with enough young people to more or less justify the title
-- Go Go music --
While scientists mutter nonsense about radiation
"And why should he be radioactive?"
And the US army which appears to have its force strength reduced to two people
completely fails to find the monster.
"How the hell we gonna find him now."
"You realise there are over five million peoplein the city?"
Yerah, but how many of them a 10-foot-tall radioactive monsters?
"I've lost him, I can't get him anywhere."
Just look for the people running away screaming and work back from there.
-- lots of screams --
And yet all of this is preamble,
because this movie features the single cheapest thing
I have seen in over a hundred Dark Corners Reviews
"Brrrring"
Let's just say that telephone again
"Brrrring"
Yes, that is a man off camera making a phone noise.
"Alright I made a mistake."
I have nothing more to say.
-- long slow moan --
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