Over the past few months,
we've covered multiple stories involving North Korea.
And what's weird is that, at one point,
the story switched from "we're all gonna die!"
to "we're all gonna live peacefully together!"
And this weekend, North and South Korea
took another big step in that direction.
REPORTER: The leaders of North and South Korea
stunned the world with their agreement
to seek peace on the Korean Peninsula
after more than six decades of hostilities.
REPORTER 2: Kim Jong-un has informed
the South Korean president that he is prepared
to abandon his nuclear weapons
if the United States agrees to formally end the Korean War
and promise not to invade his country.
That's right. It turns out all Kim Jong-un wants
in exchange for getting rid of his nuclear weapons
is a promise from Donald Trump...
which is risky.
No. I mean, a promise from Donald Trump
is one of the most worthless things you could ask for.
You might as well ask for tickets
to one of Bill Cosby's upcoming shows.
(laughter and groaning)
And now, and now, although... although this was a summit
about Kim Jong-un giving up some of his power,
there were moments that reminded us that, even without nukes,
he still has plenty of dictator swag to spare.
MAN: As the day rolled on,
more extraordinary images have continued.
Kim's limousine scooting back and forth
across the dividing line,
his personal bodyguards running alongside.
(laughter)
(laughing)
Oh, man! I'm sorry, man.
You know you have too much power
when your car has its own entourage.
Come on. That's...
Like, how are you gonna make your bodyguards
do synchronized jogging alongside your car?
If anything, it makes you less safe, right?
Because the car can only go
as fast as these guys can run. Just...
And also, when you get to where you're going,
now you've just got a team of bodyguards
that are too tired to save your life.
He's like, "Ah, look, uh... he's got a gun.
Ju... You jump behind me. You jump behind me. I'm tired."
Like, I... Like, when I saw this, I was like,
"Do they... do they have to do this all the time?"
Like in the drive-through at Del Taco,
they're still there with the guy?
I just like picturing these guys
when Kim is trying to parallel park.
He's just got nine guys with the car, just like,
"You're good. You're good. Okay, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
"Whoa. You're good. You're good.
Oh, oh. Oh, you hit Jerry! You hit Jerry!"
(laughter)
But once the Limo 500 was over,
it was time for Kim Jong-un to get some exercise of his own.
MAN: The the two leaders seemed to have an instant rapport
the minute Kim Jong-un made history
by becoming the first North Korean leader
to step foot in the south.
In a brief diplomatic dance, he invited President Moon
to cross the military demarcation line
back into the north.
Now, it may look funny,
but we just witnessed a giant moment in history.
That's the first time those leaders have stepped foot
in the other one's country.
Like, you know there was a part of Kim Jong-un, as well,
that just wanted to be like,
"Now please, step into my country.
Got him! I got him!"
(laughter)
In fact, the summit put Kim in such a good mood
that he made a huge change on the spot.
Now North Korea is also changing its time zone
to match South Korea's.
Back in 2015, North Korea set its clocks back a half hour,
and that became known as "Pyongyang Time."
WOMAN: The move was made at the proposal of Kim Jong-un
who found it painful
to see two clocks indicating different times
on the wall of the summit venue.
Yeah, that's right. Kim Jong-un moved
his entire country's time forward half an hour.
Clearly, somebody's watched Infinity War.
Uh, it's also a dick move
for anyone who had an appointment in North Korea.
Like, you didn't... you didn't plan it?
You just announced it out of nowhere?
It's just like, "Hey, I'm here for the job interview."
"Sorry, sir. 3:00 didn't happen today."
(laughter)
And-and you know what I realized this weekend, right?
We see Kim all the time, but we almost never hear him speak.
(Kim Jong-un speaking Korean in deep voice)
Okay. I don't care what anyone says.
That's not his real voice.
Yeah, that is not how he speaks.
Dude is totally pulling a Batman right now.
He knows everyone is watching, and he's like,
(in deep voice): "We have got to have peace in Gotham.
"I mean North Korea.
Alfred, I need the Batmobile and the 12 guys running next to it."
(laughter)
Now look, whatever the reason was, it was nice
to see Kim Jong-un getting along with someone for a change.
In fact, Kim and President Moon got along so well,
it gave us an idea for a new dating site.
(gentle piano music plays)
MAN: Being a dictator can be lonely.
Nobody understands you.
You work long hours,
and you've had all your relatives killed.
You may wonder if there's anyone for you.
Well, wonder no more.
At Okcommander.com, we'll set you up
with world leaders of all types.
(upbeat music playing)
Leaders you can meet with, plant trees,
take long walks on bridges
and hold hands for a very, very long time.
So log on to Okcommander.com.
You've got nothing to lose but your nukes.
(cheers and applause)
-(applause, cheering) -That's love, man.
That's love.
Now, if the North Korea talks
end up in Kim actually giving up his nukes,
this would be one of the greatest peace deals
we've ever seen brokered.
Which is why, believe it or not, South Korea's president says
that President Trump deserves the Nobel Peace Prize.
Because, he says, this never would have happened
if Trump hadn't played "bad cop."
You know? Like, really bad cop.
Like, worst cop ever. Like, "I'll let you borrow my gun
for five dollars" cop.
And Trump winning the Nobel Peace Prize,
or any prize, is an idea that MAGA supporters really love.
I remember, you know, it was very rough
three, four months ago...
(people chanting "Nobel!")
Oh...
That's very nice.
Nobel. (laughs)
-(laughter) -You know, that...
that has to be the world's first Nobel Peace Prize chant.
Like, that's how rowdy Trump's crowds are, though.
They'll chant anything. They'll be at a funeral like,
"Condolences! Condolences! Condolences!
Always in our hearts! Always in our hearts!"
And now, look, I understand, some people argue that Trump
didn't actually do much, but South Korea's president,
he doesn't care, right?
He's happy to share the glory.
And Trump agrees with him, except for the "share" part.
I had... one of the fake news groups
-(crowd booing) -this morning.
Now, they were saying, "What do you think, uh...
President Trump had to do with it?"
I'll tell you what. Like, how about everything.
(cheering)
Yeah, I, uh, I hope they have a Nobel Prize for humility, too,
because this guy, he just killed the game.