I just want to make things again.
You don't need a partner to do that.
Yeah, I don't need a partner, I need Sam.
But she's off following her bliss with that biker gang.
The Obliteraters. Hope she's okay.
It's Sam, I hope they're okay.
[chuckles]
I just wish she was here so we could do iCarly again.
If you never loved Prunella,
then why'd you say she was your soulmate?
Was it just to make me jealous?
Was this entire robot wedding just to make me jealous?!
Please? Do you really think I'd stage a fake wedding?
Ask Freddie to be my best man to make sure you'd be here,
even though I can't stand him
- and never could. - Hey?
Invite all your closest friends and family.
Pay actors to fill out the guest list.
All so you'd go mad with jealousy
and realize you and I were meant to be together all along?
Oh, my God. Neville, did you do that?
Would it be so wrong if I did?
[grunting]
Oh, hey.
What are you doing here?
I live here. What are you doing here?
Ah, you know I was just scaling the side of the building
and noticed your window is open, so boop.
[chuckles]
You scaled the building?
Please don't tell my parents.
They think I'm at Cold Stone Creamery.
[chuckles]
You still live with your parents?
That's so... normal.
I'm sorry.
I hadn't thought of you guys in ages.
But then I got a taste at the coffee shop
and ten years of therapy flew right out the window.
Look, I'm really sorry to hear that, Nora,
but you need to go.
[groaning] Can I use your front door?
Yes.
Pursued my dreams, married for love.
Millicent, do not post that.
Shh, I'm making content.
Told you to stop recording me.
I'm back living with my mom.
Just because you adopted me doesn't make you my dad.
Back living with my mom.
Literally it does. That is exactly what it means.
And send. [Freddie groaning]
Can you like it to give it some traction?
Can you like it to give it some traction, please?
Harper was there for me during the hardest time in my life.
When Bo dumped you in front of millions of subscribers?
No.
When I cut my own bangs.
And when I needed a place to live,
Carly said I should move in here.
And I'm so glad she did, because now she's my BFSS,
best friend since Sam.
And she's my BFUMCER,
best friend unless my cousin ever resurfaces.
At least you don't call yourself something dumb like Carper.
Oh, my God, that's even better than Carhar.
We should get new mugs.
Oh, there you are. Millicent, I draw your bath
and Freddie- Freddie! I put your warm milk
in your thermos next to your bed.
And if you're both good, I'll let you snuggle with me
for ten minutes and watch
Tada.
That? It looks like a dress
you would wear to an Air Force father-daughter dance.
Wow. That's a very specific and on point read.
I just think maybe I'll be more comfortable
in something I've worn before.
It's a red carpet.
You're not supposed to be comfortable.
Hey, Carly, over here.
Hey, Griffin.
You look amazing. How are you?
I'm great. How are you?
Are you leaning more towards stealing motorcycles
or temperature controlling stuffed animals?
Oh, my pee-wee baby days are long gone.
Oh, yeah?
Oh, yeah.
I had to sell 'em to pay for my settlement.
Apparently you can't just say you're a hypnotist.
Nothing is gonna stop us from having fun.
Oh, my God.
Hi, Harps.
Maeve?
[squealing]
Oh, my God.
Maeve? Your cousin who disappeared four years ago?
O-Oh, my God.
No, probably a different one.
Can't go wrong with spaghetti tacos.
This was so worth the wait.
You know what? I get it now.
♪ Feed me Feed me a spaghetti taco but ♪
♪ Not in that outfit ♪
I thought I was early, but there are
so many people here already.
They're servers.
I had them dress like guests so my friends wouldn't be all
"Ooh, look at Spencer with his waiters
in his remodeled apartment
in his Swarovski crystal boxer briefs.
Still just a regular guy.
- Gold leaf martini? - Just please.
You can really taste the gold.
Mmm mmm mmm.
Hey, you earned your success. You're the guy who made
the marshmallow White House sculpture.
The way that it was half melted
to reflect our disintegrating democracy.
Uh. Such a brave statement.
It was an accident.
I left it next to my cell phone,
which broke out into a spontaneous fire.
Anyway... now I own a falcon named Jericho.
You probably didn't notice 'cause I told her
to be on her best behavior...
but... she can be a serious pill.
I don't think so.
Most pills have healing properties.
You know... my last girlfriend would've let her choke.
Are you saying that I'm your girlfriend?
Does this answer your question?
[music playing]
Not really.
- I mean, am I your girl-- - How 'bout this?
How's it going in here?
I spilled the tea.
Oh, Spencer?!
Harper, I am so sorry that I faked my kidnapping.
But at least now you know.
You what?!
Oh, you meant.
If you let me sing it,
at least you would've gotten a hit out of it.
Wow. I clearly did it all wrong.
Pursued my dreams, married for love,
two divorces and a failed start up later,
I'm back living with my mom.
B-Bam! Who wants a Carly meatball face tee shirt?
Oh, my God. These are adorable.
I know.
Is it gauche to wear your own face?
[mumbling]
Seriously?
Spencer, it's like I told Carly
there's no such thing as bad publicity.
This meme is good for all of us.
You're getting your name out there.
I learned that my keychain guy isn't ghosting me,
he's just dead.
Plus... feel the material.
Oh, wow, that is soft.
This is fun.
No, we should make this a regular thing...
which is going to be a lot easier
because... I'm dropping anchor in Seattle.
Really?
That's great. You can stay with us.
I'll make you a key.
Actually, she's gonna stay with me.
Now what, now?
Oh, just while I look for a place, or... who know?
[music playing]
Wow.
Four... three... two...
Welcome to the new iCarly.
Ooh, looks like she's already got a few viewers.
Probably bots from Brazil.
This is still iCarly, but it's grown up now.
So, today I thought I'd share my skin care routine.
According to the many, many targeted ads I get,
it's never too early to start using...
anti-aging products, even for Baby Spencer!
Yay! That's me!
None of these products were tested on animals,
just one tiny, little, lucky infant.
Oh, I feel lucky.
In no way am I worried!
[chuckles]
Here we go.
Oh!
Oh, I think he needs a lot more.
- Some more? - I don't--
No, that's enough alread--
Ah!
I don't think this is how you do it!