This question we never had to deal with when we were kids because the world is changed.
Is screen time dangerous for kids?
You know, there's actually a lot of studies coming out that are showing that yeah, there
are some negative affect of too much screen time.
But you know what?
I think it's important to recognize it's not the screens that are the problem.
-No.
-You're watching us on a screen right now.
We're not going to badmouth screens all day.
But they're kind of like fire.
I like this analogy.
You know, VIcki how there was a time when our kids we're little when there was a little
fire that...
[Laughs] Do you remember this?
And fire is dangerous, right?
It can burn down your house.
It can consume a forest of even an entire community.
We've seen this in the news from time to time.
So, is fire a bad thing?
No.
Fire is a powerful thing.
We make that distinction.
Fire is powerful.
And because of that, we want to put it in the right context or put the right limits
around it.
We keep a fire in the fire place or in the..
-It's fine, yeah.
-So, awesome.
And it cooks our food.
It drives our car.
But it's dangerous if it's let out of that context because of the power.
And I think screen are similar.
-Yeah.
I like things...
Say, fire has power.
It's powerful.
And that's the same thing I think for screens.
They're very, very powerful.
And there are some wonderful uses of them.
But let's get very clear in very real about...
And make sure we're talking about the limits or the environment in which we invite those
screens into our world.
-I think one of the risk that we run into...
This is a very common thing so don't feel badly if this applies to you.
But it's easy to put our kid on a screen as a little "baby sitter" for a few minutes while
we handle something.
-Right.
-The problem that comes up though is if we don't put appropriate limits around it than
that few minutes while we're getting a shower.
And how many mom's out there would just love to have just a few minutes...
-Right exactly -...in a shower or wherever it is to take care of you.
Yeah, you need that.
And I think screens are actually a legitimate way to occupy a child for a limited amount
of time.
But have the emphasis on limited.
-Right.
Especially at any point when using those screens is to avoid actual interaction with your child
for any reason or with other people.
That's a time to really question yourself and see what your motivation is and what the
consequences might be.
-Vicki, you share a study with me recently about language development.
-Yeah.
-Can you share?
-There's a certain number of words that a child needs to be exposed to before they actually
even are ready for reading and things in it.
It has a very direct impact on the vocabulary acquisition.
And the study show that it has to be words that they have interaction with actual people.
-Actual interaction with people?
-Yeah.
So, if have your child watching some educational video, that's fine and well.
But realize that those words are not actually contributing to their language development
and their vocabulary acquisition.
-Not the way a direct interaction would.
And this surprise some of the researchers because I think they were expecting it, maybe
it's going to be similar if they're watching it on a program.
But it's not.
There are some qualitative difference.
So, we need to understand that.
-Just remember that face-to-face time is really what we're going for when it comes to developing
empathy, relationships, language, problem solving.
-Now, we're talking about is screen time dangerous for kids?
It's not screens necessarily.
It's the stuff that they have access to through that screen.
-Yeah.
-Or in some cases the access that others might have to them through that screen.
Gaming for example.
I think parents really need to be aware of this because int the gaming world, much of
what's happening on that little game screen is also connected to a large network of other
gamers.
And this is unfortunately where some predators place themselves so that they'll have access
to your kids.
I want you to know that because then you cans set appropriate limits.
If a predator of some kind of violent criminal came to your door and knock on your door.
And you know who they are.
Are you going to invite them to dinner with the kids?
-Absolutely not.
-No.
You're a much better parent than that.
Who we're we inviting or what are we inviting into our homes through our screens.
So, I think there's some appropriate cautions that we can take.
We had rule, Vicki in our home that we don't have screens available in our children's bedrooms.
-Yes.
They have to be out in the family area.
-So, the computer or the tablet or the gaming system.
Now, your kids might be big fans of "I want that in my bedroom".
Really?
What are we going to allow in to our child's bedroom?
And anything that's available on the internet could be sneaking in there with them.
Put it on the public place.
-If they are uncomfortable with you seeing what they're viewing on the screen then probably
that should raise some little flags in your head, do you think?
-Yeah.
You know, it kind of comes down to you're the parent.
-Yes.
-And so, you get to set the limits.
Not to mention, I don't know very many kids who can afford any of the screens we're talking
about on their own.
You provided these screens.
You can set the limits.
Be the parent, set appropriate limits.
-They're not entitled to what all of their friends have or what they think they should
be able to access.
I love the way you said that, Vicki.
Be the parent.
You don't have to show up as their friend.
This doesn't have to be popular with them.
You use your judgement discretion as a parent to do the right thing even if it's not popular.
If you still wondering where to go with this or some of the other challenging topics that
we have to deal with as parents, you would probably love the coaching groups and the
digital programs that are available to you.
We've got a lot of resources.
Vicki, tell them where they can find those.
-Go to DrPaulJenkins.com/breakthroughcall.
-That'll get you on with one of our certified coaches.
And they'll tell you all about what's available.