[Chapter 4 Al & Lisa Robertson]
Just like my parents before me,
a low point was hit when my wife and I had to question, is our marriage over?
I'm Al Robertson, the firstborn son. This is my wife Lisa,
and this is our chapter in our journey from dysfunction to dynasty.
[I Am Second Presents]
[Dysfunction]
[Dynasty]
[The Robertson Family Dysfunction to Dynasty]
So the worst part of your wife cheating on you
is that you think you're going crazy.
[1999 All the Voices]
There's something inside you that you know is not right,
but you can't figure it out.
[Al Robertson] First thing you notice are the gaps of time.
You know, where were you? I was literally going insane.
But then I found this persons name and in her purse, and I'm just like,
I mean, why is this here?
Then I just broke, I just thought, well, you know what?
You're judgmental, you're the problem.
You're making these accusations against your wife, I mean, obviously
if she were doing this, she would have told us.
She would have told the truth.
Another voice says, how can you preach and teach when
you got this going on in your own house? So then it became my problem.
Just this constant trial is going on inside my head
and sometimes you're the prosecutor and sometimes you're the defender.
It was 14 months of this.
It keeps coming back to there's no truth.
And so I didn't really have any answers for all the voices.
I had a friend that worked for the cellphone place
and so we dug into the phone records
all of a sudden it's like whoa, now I know.
'Cause I tracked the numbers, sure enough, the same guy
that was in the purse all those months ago.
Here's his number, I have truth.
[1984]
[1984 You Filled Out]
We were at our popular hangout here in West Monroe,
which was MacDonald's back in the day.
[Lisa Robertson] One day I see this really, really, really cute guy.
Since I knew everybody, I knew he had to be new.
I come over to her car,
and it's the first time I notice her and I was like, "Whoa, this girl."
In redneck language, whoa means you filled out.
I leaned in to the window and started a conversation that eventually led to a date.
[Al and Lisa in High School] As a child I had a lot of things going on in my life.
And you know, I thought this is fresh and new,
he doesn't know anything about it and this is my knight in shining armor.
[2000]
[2000 I Don't Want You Here]
We went to a football game, it was a Friday night.
The whole time I'm just like sour, you know, and so
she's feeling that radiating from me and she knew something was different.
So we get back home and we put our girls to bed, and then bam.
He says, "I know what's happening, I know what's going on,
and I need you to tell me about it."
This starts at nine or ten at night. So we're 2:00 or 3:00 AM
and I'm still just like truth, truth, truth.
And so she starts to break and she's like,
"If I tell you the truth, you'll leave me, we'll be over."
And so finally she said it. "Yes, I've been having an affair."
And so then I... after that, my initial moment when she said the words
and this sounds crazy to me now, is was relief.
And I was like okay, I don't want you here, I don't want you in this house.
I want you still in the kids life.
I'm not making any hard decisions about anything tonight,
but I just know I don't want you here.
And so she left.
I just say, I am not doing anything, I mean, what are you talking about?
He proceeds to tell me, "I have the phone records
and I need you to be honest and tell me."
I had not been honest for a very long time, since I was a young child.
And for me to be totally honest was to give up a part of myself,
because I was admitting that I was not who everybody thought I was.
I said, "If I tell you this, you're not ever going to want to have anything to do with me.
You're going to ask me to leave, you're going to divorce me."
And he said, "If you're not honest with me, I'm going to divorce you anyway."
And so I said, "It's all true.
It's probably a lot worse than what you think."
And so he said, "Okay, that's it. I need you to leave."
I was just like, I know God's been prodding me to tell the truth,
why would he prod me to tell the truth if I'm losing everything?
I realized at that point that I had no relationship with God.
That I did not know who God was.
[The Dethroning]
Alan would not have anything to do with me.
He wouldn't talk to me.
Can I forgive her? Is it even possible?
At first I didn't even want to think about it.
I was working at Duck Commander for the Robertson family.
And of course at that point, I'm fired, I don't have a job anymore.
You have people speaking in each ear.
The Robertson's did not want Alan to reconcile with me.
They did not feel as though I could change.
In one ear people are saying, You guys made a mistake,
there was too much baggage."
Alan was the golden boy and I had hurt him tremendously.
And in the other ear, here's a couple, that went through it, why don't you talk to them?
And I wasn't really interested. I would see what happens when
a couple says, "I forgive you," and didn't really mean it.
All that was was a precursor to the next time there was a problem
it just turns into a disaster.
I started going to a counsellor.
Then I got to this crossroads.
- And I was able to be honest. - Okay.
If I say the words, how do I really mean it?
What I finally realized is whenever I married Alan
I would have done anything to marry him.
And he pretty much became my god whenever I married him.
So I had a very deep conversation with the Almighty.
At this point, I dethroned him
and I put the real Lord of my life in the position that he needed to be.
I said, "Will you reveal to me any inkling of any untruth,"
if she's ever going down this road again, will you reveal it to me?
If you can assure me that that will happen,
I feel like I can extend forgiveness and mean it.
Finally, for the first time in my life, Jesus Christ was the Lord of my life.
I was now an honest person. And I had not ever been honest before.
And then I told her the words. I said, the words.
I said, "I forgive you, and I love you.
And we're going to spend the rest of our lives doing what we missed out on."
And of course she said, "I'm so sorry for what I put you through."
And that's all I know.
That's why it's going to be a journey, it's going to be a hard one,
but we can do this.
[Al and Lisa have remained married for 30 years and counting.]
There was a time in my life that I didn't even know
that I would have daughters and granddaughters.
I never could have seen myself as a wife, as a mother, as a grandmother.
Our lives are just so different because we chose to fight through
our marriage and to fight for our marriage.
Our relationship with Jesus Christ has helped us realize that through doubt,
through fear, through worry, through pain, through difficulty,
through brokenness, that you can be renewed.
Even in our bad marriage, all things are possible
through Jesus Christ.
- My name is Al Robertson. - My name is Lisa Robertson.
- And I Am Second. - And I Am Second.
[I Am Second]