Hey everyone, and welcome to TopThink.
Today, we are going to learn about 10 things every guy must learn in their 20s.
Now, let’s begin.
1.
Accepting Criticism For the rest of your life, people will criticize
you.
They’ll complain about your decisions.
They’ll correct your mistakes.
But every guy should learn that criticism… is an important part of life.
Sometimes, criticism is helpful and constructive.
Other times, it’s hurtful and frustrating.
But all kinds of criticism—the good and the bad—help you become a stronger person.
Ultimately, criticism teaches you how to be tough.
When it brings you down, you need strength to pick yourself up.
If someone criticizes your work, you need strength to change and improve.
If you never learn how to take criticism, you’ll spend your life defending your weaknesses
instead of nurturing your strengths.
You’ll listen to the wrong people, and you’ll ignore the helpful feedback coming your way.
So get used to being criticized.
Open your ears to the world around you.
Listen to the good.
Persevere through the bad.
And help yourself grow into a stronger person.
2.
Building Conversations Can you hold a conversation?
In their twenties, guys expect others to carry the weight of every conversation.
Let’s say you’re talking to someone older than you.
they may be the one asking all the questions.
They may be steering the conversation from topic to topic, but it’s time you sat in
the driver’s seat.
Before your twenties, people are willing to carry conversations for you.
They give you the benefit of the doubt, because you’re too young to lead a conversation
on your own.
But in your twenties, you need to step up.
Now it’s your job to ask questions.
It’s your job to take the lead, steer the conversation, and create interest in what
you’re saying.
In other words, you can’t be a passive conversationalist.
You need to engage the people around you; otherwise no one will bother with you.
You’ll struggle to connect with people, and no one will listen to what you have to
say.
That can be a huge setback in your personal and professional lives.
So learn how to talk.
Spend your twenties building social and intellectual confidence.
Give yourself the tools to lead a conversation, because you will use those tools for the rest
of your life.
3.
Asserting Your Needs Are you direct and honest?
In their twenties, men learn to ask for what they want.
They learn to be direct, forward, and assertive, because nothing in life is free.
Nothing in life falls into your lap.
If you want something, you have to stand up and take it.
You may be scared of being direct.
Maybe you’d rather wait for someone else to do the work for you.
But in your twenties, no one does you any favors.
In the past, you had people looking out for you, but now it’s your responsibility.
You need to set your fears aside and face your challenges head on.
If, for example, you think you deserve a promotion, how do you make that happen?
You have to walk into your boss’s office, and you have to make your case.
You have to ask directly for everything you want.
Because the only person who really cares about your success… is you.
4.
Searching for Purpose Do you have your life figured out?
Here’s the truth.
In their twenties, no one has their lives figured out.
If you don’t know what you’re doing, don’t worry.
You’re in the majority.
In their twenties, most guys feel lost, aimless, and confused.
You’re trying to make something of yourself in the world.
You want to find your purpose and your passions.
You want to do something you love, but you also want to prove to your friends and family
that you can be successful.
You want all of these things… but you have no idea how to get there.
Fortunately, getting lost is a good thing.
If you feel lost, it means you’re searching for something greater.
Everyone you admire, everyone you envy—they were all lost at some point in their lives,
likely during their twenties.
It’s because of their uncertainty that they discovered the path they’re on today.
Don’t panic because you don’t know what you’re doing with your life.
Don’t ridicule or criticize yourself.
Instead, encourage yourself to keep trying, and don’t settle for the first good thing
that comes your way.
You may feel lost now.
You may be desperate for a sense of direction.
But if you keep searching for your path in life, eventually… you’ll find it.
5.
Inevitable Change Your life will change countless times in your
twenties.
You live in different places.
You befriend different people.
You’ll immerse yourself in new environments, social groups, careers, and relationships.
Life is a long, unpredictable ride.
You never know how its twists and turns will affect the way you think, feel, and act.
For example, when you’re twenty-one, you may travel the world, migrating from country
to country.
You may prioritize freedom, independence, and discovery.
But when you’re twenty-eight, you may be looking for something else.
You’re searching for comfort, stability, and security.
You may be settling into a long relationship or looking for a place to call home.
Within the same decade, your priorities may change completely.
Some parts of you will stay the same, and some parts of you won’t.
But no matter who you become or where you go, remember this: change is inevitable.
6.
Taking It Easy Unfortunately, life doesn’t get easier after
your twenties.
Many guys approach their twenties thinking their hard work will finally pay off.
Maybe you worked at a dead-end job for years.
Maybe you suffered through an extra decade of school.
Now, you’re ready to live an easy, comfortable life… but that’s not how it works.
The challenges never stop coming.
There will always be obstacles in your path.
There will always be goals you want to accomplish.
No matter how high you climb, life never gets easier.
But that’s a good thing.
Many guys think they want an easy, comfortable future, but ambitious people get bored when
they don’t have dreams to chase or goals to achieve.
Yes, life is a difficult journey, but those challenges are what make your life inspiring,
fun, and exciting.
Don’t break your life into decades thinking, “If I work hard now, I’ll be stable and
comfortable later,” because that’s not true.
It doesn’t get easier from here, but even though it won’t be easy… you can accomplish
bigger and better things.
You can achieve new levels of success, and that makes your work worth doing.
7.
Experimental Relationships Relationships in your twenties are chaotic.
You think you’re in love with someone… until they break your heart.
Someone says they’re in love with you… but suddenly they fall for someone else.
It may feel like people are rushing in and out of your life.
And that’s frustrating.
But it’s also an important experience for every guy to have in their twenties.
Many guys search for the perfect partner in their twenties.
They rush to find the person they’re going to marry, but there will be plenty of time
for that later in your life.
Right now, you need to learn how to be in a relationship.
You need to discover what kind of partners will make you happy.
Otherwise the person you meet… may not be the person you want.
To put it simply, your twenties are a period of experimentation and discovery.
You’re still growing as an individual.
You hardly know what you want from yourself.
So how do you know what you want from someone else?
The simple truth is… you don’t.
8.
The Wrong Choice No one makes the right decisions all the time.
No matter how hard you try, you will make mistakes.
You’ll fail more times than you’d like to admit.
But that’s okay.
In fact, it’s more than okay—it’s necessary.
Bad decisions point you in the direction of good decisions.
Anytime you don’t know what to do, there’s really only one wrong choice you can make:
choosing to do nothing.
In any situation, make the best decision you can.
Whether it’s good or bad, successful or not, trying your hardest will always lead
you in the right direction.
9.
Expansive Experiences Your twenties are a decade full of risks.
We talked about how many changes you encounter in your twenties.
Whenever there’s change, there’s risk.
In new environments, with new people—each time you experience a major change in your
life, you have to put yourself out there.
But that’s what your twenties are made for.
Every guy in their twenties wants to have his life figured out.
But you’ll never get what you want… unless you take a risk.
Your twenties are the perfect time in your life to take those risks.
You should be jumping from place to place.
You should be switching from job to job.
Because you need to expand your horizons.
You need to say yes to new opportunities and take risks you wouldn’t normally take.
Most of all… you need to be patient with yourself.
Because it takes a long time to figure your life out.
Luckily, the more experiences you have, the more answers you’ll discover.
10.
The Formula for Success What’s the magic formula for success?
Every man needs to learn this important lesson: there is no magic formula.
There’s no foolproof lesson or path that launches you toward a successful future.
For some, this is a harsh reality or a painful truth.
Success is never a guarantee, no matter how badly you want to achieve it.
But if any lesson could motivate your success, it’s this one.
When you learn how fickle success can be, you stop hoping for success to fall into your
lap.
Instead, you learn to take action.
You take responsibility for your own achievements, and you learn what it takes to become a successful
person.
Remember that success isn’t magic.
There is no secret formula.
The longer you wait around, the less chance you have of being successful.
So take risks.
Build confidence.
And, if you want something… go out there get it.
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