You've probably heard adults or other kids say things like, "I'm so stressed!"
or "That stresses me out!" But, what does that really mean??
What is stress all about anyways? Stress is normal and natural
and it happens to everyone. It happens to kids, it happens to teenagers,
and it even happens to adults. And, stress can be caused by all sorts of things,
like the time your mom flipped her lid when she discovered that you drew all
over the wall with her favorite lipstick😲 Yep... that's stress all right. You see, our
brain and our body are connected. They work together as a team. When we
feel worried or unsure about something, our brain sends a special signal to our
body. It's called the "stress response". The stress response
helps to get us ready to face the things that come our way. Let's do some
pretending to learn more. Let's pretend it's Jasmine's first day
of school. She hasn't seen the other students, the teachers, or the principal
for a long time. Maybe Jasmine feels nervous about going
back to school; maybe she didn't sleep well the night before,
her face feels extra warm, or her heart is beating faster than usual.
What Jasmine is experiencing in her body is called the stress response. Or,
let's pretend James has a presentation to give in front of his class.
Maybe James feels worried because he really wants to do a good job in front
of his teacher and his friends; maybe his hands are shaky, his tummy has
butterflies, or his voice sounds a bit wobbly. What's
happening to James? Yep... you got it. James is experiencing the
stress response. Just like Jasmine and James, when we're faced with something
new or tricky, it's totally normal for our stress
response to show up. In fact, we can even EXPECT our stress
response at these times. Although there are some types of stress
that are not good for us, most of the time stress is actually
helpful. When we're brave and we're able to face our worries,
we build a stronger brain. It's true! The more we practice something, the better we
get at it, and our stress response gets smaller and
smaller. It also turns out that HOW we think
about stress makes a big difference too! Let's go back
to Jasmine's story. Jasmine can say to herself, "This is too
scary! I want to stay home," which will make her nervous feelings
even worse. Or, she can say something to herself like,
"This is my stress response. It happens to everyone.
I feel nervous, but i can get through this. I might even have fun at school!"
This will help her nervous feelings get smaller. Let's go back to James' story.
James can say to himself, "This is too much!
I can't do the presentation. I'm gonna mess up,"
which will make his worried feelings and stress response even bigger.
Or, he can say something to himself such as, "It's normal to feel worried right now.
My presentation might not be perfect, but i can handle it. I will be brave and try
my best!" This will help James' worried feelings
get smaller. But wait..... there's more! Our breath is a
super strategy inside of us all. When we practice calm breathing, oxygen
goes to our brain which turns down the volume on our
stress signal. This helps our brain and our body feel more relaxed.
When we're calm, it's easier for us to face our worries and do the things that
we need to do. Let's try starfish breathing. Take one
hand and open your fingers like a starfish.
Good! Now, take your other hand and make a pointer finger.
Start at the bottom of your thumb. Slowly trace your starfish with your pointer
finger. Breathe in while you go up and breathe out while you go down.
That's right.... up and down, in and out.
Do this for all five fingers on your starfish. Try not to go too fast or too
slow. You want to find your own "just right"
speed. Everyone's just right speed might be a little different. That's okay!
You can do starfish breathing as many times as you want
until you feel calmer. Let's try box breathing. This strategy is
extra fun with a pencil and paper. If you like, you can pause the video now
to get yourself a pencil and paper. Okay..... draw a start button on the left
side of your page. Good! Now draw a line across for the top of your box,
and a line down for the right side of
the box, and lines for the bottom and the other side.
It should look something like this. Good! Now put your pencil down and make a
pointer finger with your hand. Put your pointer finger on the start
button. Breathe in as you slowly trace the top of the box with your finger,
hold your breath as you trace the side, breathe out as you slowly trace the
bottom, and hold your breath again while you
trace the other side. Good ! Breathe in, hold;
breathe out, hold. Just like with starfish breathing,
you will want to find your own just right speed.
Trace around the box as many times as you need to feel calmer.
And lastly, remember there are times when stress can feel too big for kids to
handle alone. We all need help sometimes. When this
happens, it's really important that you ask a trusted
adult for support. Your trusted adult might be a parent,
a foster parent, an aunt, an uncle, a grandparent,
a teacher, a principal, or a coach. All kids have different trusted adults in
their lives. The important thing is to reach out for
help when you need it. So, the more we know about stress and how
it works, the easier it becomes to handle. To learn more about how your brain and
body are connected, check us out at teenmentalhealth.org.