"Everyone thinks of changing in the world, but no one thinks of changing himself."
See change is one of those things that's necessary in life. It's the process of
life right yet the notion of this is so difficult to grasp sometimes because
change never looks the same. There's no template for it or a schedule for what
happens and when it happens—it just happens. At what seems to always be at
the right time. Being honest, I've struggled with this before in the past
because change has always made me uncomfortable. It's something that I've
tried to prepare for but never knew how because I wasn't quite sure what changes
to prepare for. If that makes any sense. I felt like a deer in headlights—okay
what do I do right, but that's the thing about life
it's so unpredictable at times so how can we really prepare for that. I mean there
are some things that I've learned on my own journey about life like
understanding that being comfortable with feeling uncomfortable in regards to
change is a good thing because in this space of feeling
uncomfortable is where you really start to grow in your life and making that
transition towards living instead of just existing. My life is just spinning
like Ferris wheels. Hoping that the next time I come around I'll see a different
view, but habits don't change unless you want them to. Do I want them to? See I'm
just a man torn between life and living and honestly I'm not sure which of the
two I'm most value. See when change happens in our life on the surface we're
quote-unquote "comfortable" with the idea of it right it's good to mix it up
sometimes, but deep inside we're actually feeling frantic, worried, uncomfortable
and trying to convince ourselves otherwise. See the questions we need to
face the mirror and ask ourselves are: why am I struggling with change? and what
can I do to position myself to handle change better? and the first reason we
feel this way or are struggling with this is because we don't have a why.
I've talked about this a lot throughout my content already but I keep coming
back to it because it's such a key piece in this puzzle. See when you know why
you're doing something or want to be doing something it then doesn't take
much motivation to continue at it. So for example if you were to personally ask me
why minimalism. My first response wouldn't be because I owned
too much stuff. Although yes I had way too much stuff, I actually tell you it's
because I wanted to reinvent myself first or if you were to ask me what is
my why in life—my mantra. I'd tell you it's to always stay true to myself. See
because I know this, it makes growing comfortable with change easier right and
then when all of these adjustments start to happen I know it's an opportunity for
me to grow and learn on my journey. So if you don't have a solid why in your life. I
really want to encourage you to dig deeper than surface level and really
figure out what it is for you. The second thing is the word "but" has become our
best friend. Often when change happens or an opportunity for change arises the
word "but" is the first to roll off of our tongue. Which means there's an excuse
coming next right so "I'd love to do this but... it makes me uncomfortable" or "Wow I can
really see myself making this change in my life but... it's hard for me to stay
motivated." See we have to face the mirror again and have an honest conversation
with ourselves about our relationship with the word "but" because oftentimes
this one word is the only thing that's holding us back.
Number three is our lack of self-belief. Simply put you have to believe in
yourself and I have to believe in myself. We have to believe that we're capable of
doing or learning how to do whatever it is that we want to do and this continued
drive for knowledge plays a big role in the outcome of your situation. So the
more you know and the more you're willing to learn, the more you grow right
and the more you grow, the more confident and comfortable you become during times
of change. Number four is our fear of opinions and judgment. Worrying ourselves
about what others may say or think is one of the biggest hindrances to
positive change in our life and I'm saying this because I've done it. I've
had those conversations in the back of my head. I've felt that fear and
unsureness, but I've also been able to make a shift
in my way of thinking and if you haven't seen or read any of my poetry I highly
recommend you checking out two of them: Black boy and Fear because in those
two pieces I really feel like I expressed this change both physically,
mentally and emotionally for myself on my own journey. I'll leave the links to
both of them down below in the description box. If you watch them and
they resonate with you please let me know, but if you're enjoying this
conversation so far make sure you give it a thumbs up for me and if
this is your first time tuning in, welcome I'm really glad to have you here
and I hope you're enjoying this conversation as well, Okay the last point
I want to mention for why we struggle with change is because we're stuck in
our comfort zone. In other words we're afraid to challenge ourselves in fear of
making a mistake; of failing; of feeling discouraged; of losing motivation and the
list can go on, but I'm telling you coming from someone who is in the midst
of pushing the boundaries of his comfort zone. This, just like the fear of opinions
and judgment, is a hindrance and I've learned that in order to expand the
boundaries of a comfort zone or to grow or to change. We have to be willing to
learn how to be comfortable in uncomfortable moments outside of our
comfort zone. I really hope this conversation made you think. If it did,
embrace those thoughts. Let's continue this conversation down below and always
remember to stay true to you and I see the next one. Peace!