Transcriber: Mia Tran Reviewer: Sebastian Betti
“I am a failure.”
Those 4 words were the ones I used to tell myself
every single time I couldn’t pass a test,
couldn’t do a simple chore, and couldn’t help others.
It broke me down,
as 4 simple words kept repeating themselves.
I first came to light when I was 7.
I was about to play my great guitar performance
While everyone was flawlessly playing their pieces,
I started to become nervous.
My legs started to shake and I started to shiver, my teeth chattered together.
This was new. I have never felt this way before and it frightened me.
Then, it was my turn.
I stood up, couldn’t carry my book and guitar on the stage.
I looked around in fear,
“Why are you looking at me like that?
Couldn’t they see that I was scared, nervous, anxious to be up here?”
I darted my eyes across the room. It was my teacher, choosing my guitar.
I remember the exact words she told me:
“Good luck, Lucas. Have fun.”
This is exactly what did not happen.
I stood up, rapidly said the name of my piece to get it out,
placed my leg on the stool, and started playing.
I went on to play the first half of the piece well,
but when it got to that specific bar line, it was done.
The whole song was butchered. It collapsed.
I started to get one note wrong,
then another, then another, which just ended with my hands stiffening up,
everyone looking at me with blank expressions,
and me just trying to get to the end of the piece alive.
After buying with shame, I sunk into my chair
and wondered about how much of a failure I was.
My teacher came up to me and said:
“It was only one mistake, Lucas. Don’t beat yourself up about it.”
I expect you to think that was the last time I played guitar.
But no, that one failure did not stop me from doing the thing I now love.
With the help of the people around me, I kept playing guitar
and I kept making failures.
But this time I was getting more confident with it.
I start to celebrate these failures,
seeing them as a stepping stone to where I am today, finished the last great.
Kennedy once said “Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.”
Everyone here now has failed once, if not a million times.
If it was a test, a diet, or failure to keep a simple promise, we all have.
I look around and I see people scared to fail.
They play the same recording inside their head, saying,
“If I’m going to fail at this, I might as well not try.”
Yep. I recognize that sentence.
That one phrase nearly stopped me from doing something else. Kickboxing.
Three years ago, as I kept walking to school,
I passed the same kickboxing place repeatedly.
One day I was a bit interested,
so I took one of the flies they had aside and took it home.
Now this looks promising.
A whole new form of exercise and a new thing I’ve never tried before.
When I got home, I booked a free trial.
And next thing I know, I was walking that old ecstatic
to try this type of martial arts, thinking I would be the next Karate Kid.
You know, “Wax on, wax off.”
As I walked up the steep steps,
I could hear the grunting and mumbling from the teacher to the students,
telling them to not give up.
But honestly, it frightened me.
Instead of walking, I started to creep up the last steps,
as if someone were to attack me the second I walked through the door.
When I got in, I saw people
dodging punches and throwing kicks all over the place.
Even looking teared me in my eyes and sent shivers down my back.
He started chanting combinations, and the people around me formed a stance.
This was one hour of pure hell.
The sweat, the shouting, the pain that I had to endure was just unspeakable.
I had to limp back home.
It was just enough time for me to decide that
if I’m going to fail at this, I might as well not try.
After having this recording, playing “Summerhead” for three weeks,
I decided to do something about it.
I realized that the fear of failure stopped me from growing as a person,
and by using the suffering as an excuse, I had been doing that exact thing.
So I flipped the script.
I said “Screw it”,
and next thing I know I was back into what I used to call hell,
and what I now call a fun place to relax and relieve stress.
Three years later, and I’m only one belt away from a black belt.
Do you see the moral of the story?
My fear of failure nearly cost me three years of fun, excitement,
friendship and my self-growth.
Let me ask you a question.
How do you expect to succeed if you don't fail?
How do you expect to be the best entrepreneur,
to be the best basketball player,
to be the best person you want to be if you don’t fail?
Every time we fail, we are one step closer to the end goal.
We are one step closer to being the best version of ourselves.
We fail. Fail a million times, if you must.
Just don’t keep putting energy into the same failure. Learn and move on.
We must understand that to fail is to be human.
Thank you.