The Johnnysaurus Rex is ready!
The Duke-A-Don is readier!
And friendly.
-OK, the rules are simple.
-You just run through the tunnel, over the hurdles,
climb the wall, and...
First step is the speed test.
-Whoever gets to the finish line first... -Ah-wins-ah.
Uh, how do you start a dino?
Come on! You gotta go!
We can't lose to the J-Rex!
Come on, J-Rex!
Just get over the wall, and we win.
Come on, boy, just grab the rope. You can do it. Grab it!
Wait. What's that thing that horses hate again?
Oh, yeah. Giddy-up!
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
OK, forget the rope, just jump. Jump it now!
-We win!
Now, how do you stop a dino?
Next up, the Intelligence Test.
Movies tell us the mark of a superior dino
is learning human behavior, like opening a door.
Blobby...
Or using tools.
Very good, Blobby.
OK, Duke-A-Don, just do this.
Yes!
OK, now prepare to have your mind blown by the J-Rex!
It's his tiny arms again, isn't it?
-Yup. -Just bring on the next test.
Time now for the High-Five Test.
Wait, what?
Physical interaction can also determine a species' superiority.
On it! Slap me five, dino of mine!
Yes!
Now it's your turn.
Darn it!
And the Duke-A-Don wins again!
It's not necessarily J-Rex's fault, Johnny.
He's from the Triassic Period, while D-Don is from the Cretaceous.
Come again?
That's over 90 million years of evolution separating the two.
J-Rex's tiny brain and tinier arms just aren't as evolved.
Really? Well, in that case...
90 million years of evolving coming up!
Johnny, no!
-We can't interrupt the sequence once it's started!
Well, if Johnny's dino gets to evolve more, so does mine!
-Stop!
You can't mess with evolution.
It might lead to strange results.
Blobby?
Oh, you mean like J-Rex having longer arms
and a bigger brain than the dork-a-don?
I'll see you at the starting line.
Maybe creating an evolution beam was a bad idea.
It's possible.
You heard the horn. Let's go!
-Yeah, giddy-up!
Whoa!
Oof!
Uh, Johnny?
I think they want us to race and not them.
Huh. Didn't see that coming.
Check that.
The evolution beam was absolutely a bad idea.
-Blobby...
Wait, why is he flying away?
You know what? Your dino wins. It's awesome.
Let's quit.
-Let's call it a tie,
Cos the J-Rex is looking so much stronger.
And now he looks hungry.
Let's go back the other way.
Uh, what's going on?
When you evolved your dinosaurs, you also evolved their instincts!
-Which is? -To eat meaty moving things like us!
But mine's a plant-eater.
-Not anymore!
-Get to the lab and save yourselves!
And come and get us, dinos!
-Uh-oh.
Yeah, this is not how I saw myself going out.
Oh, thanks, Blobby.
Blobby!
What if we turn them back into bones?
Evolution only goes one way, Johnny: forward.
So we're gonna evolve them more.
And make them unstoppably smart and powerful
so they eat us then take over the world?
Or they develop human-like empathy and compassion
and calm down.
Now we just have to think of a way to lure them onto the test pattern and--
Yo, dinos! You hungry for some of this?
Or this?
If I was a dino, I would totally eat that.
Now!
They're getting louder!
Did it work?
Oh, you're right. Those roars were a tad loud.
So sorry.
We're clearly evolved 70 million years and need to develop proper manners.
Ooh... sophisticated.