Back in the early 80s, there wasn’t a bigger game than Donkey Kong.
Back in the early 90s, there wasn’t a bigger game than Donkey Kong Country.
81, 94, different decade, same story.
Donkey Kong was Donkey King.
Yeah, see, he’s all about that.
He’ll talk for hours about the original and the sequel, and the resurrection…what
he doesn’t like to talk about, what no one really talks about…are the years in between.
What happened between Donkey Kong, Jr. and Donkey Kong Country?
I mean, if this guy was such a big deal in the eighties, why did he need resurrected
in the nineties?
What happened to Donkey Kong?
Well, he had something up his ass.
Hey, don’t hate the sprayer, hate the game.
So this is Donkey Kong 3.
Yes, there was a Donkey Kong 3.
It’s okay if you’re surprised, it’s a game people don’t really talk about, and
there are a couple reasons for that.
One, it was a huge departure from the two prior games…two, it’s nowhere near as
good as the two prior games…and three…it sort of, inadvertently, kind of…almost killed
Donkey Kong.
Okay, so it’s not exactly that simple, but…look, for an entire decade after its release, this
was the last Donkey Kong game.
Donkey Kong was one of the biggest names in gaming, then this one came out, and then…
And that’s how it stayed.
For more than ten years, that’s how it stayed.
And so the question becomes…why?
Why shelf one of the hottest things in the business?
Why retire a character when he’s the king?
Well…maybe it’s because…the king had fallen.
And I mean, there were plenty of factors.
The rise of consoles, when Donkey Kong was an arcade concept…not to mention the rise
of new faces, like Mario, and Link, and Samus…
…and Mario…
But at this point, we’re sort of ignoring the 500 lb.
gorilla in the room.
And the fact that…we’re spraying his ass.
So Donkey Kong 3 is the black sheep of the family.
The one people don’t like as much, the one that helped force its legendary ape into hibernation
for 11 years.
And apes don’t even hibernate, that’s how weird Donkey Kong 3 is.
And I mean, it’s fine to be different—Donkey Kong, Jr. was different from the original,
and that game’s amazing.
But there are many…many differences, between Donkey Kong, Jr. and Donkey Kong 3.
And it all starts…with poor Stanley.
See, with Mario getting ready to change the entire landscape of the industry with his
own platformer…he couldn’t fit another Donkey Kong game into his schedule.
Kind of busy, you know?
Or at least that’s how Nintendo saw it.
And so they wanted a new hero to foil the mischievous monkey, and that hero…was Stanley.
Stanley the Bug Man.
You know, it’s kind of like when a movie comes out, and hits it big…and the lead
actor becomes a big star…and then they make a
disappointing sequel without the big star.
That’s Donkey Kong 3.
Stanley is, like…Danny Glover in Predator 2.
And it’s not just a matter of star power.
In fact, that’s the least of its problems.
What hurts Donkey Kong 3 isn’t that Mario left…it’s that he took the story with
him.
See, one of the things that made the original Donkey Kong so special…is that it told a
story.
There were characters, there was progression…and most importantly, there was an ending.
Donkey Kong was one of the first games to have that kind of fully realized narrative.
And the second game took it a step further.
Not only did Donkey Kong, Jr. have a story, but it picked up where the first game left
off…and it threw in a plot twist.
This time around, the villain was the sympathetic figure…and the hero was the villain.
So the first two Donkey Kong games were groundbreaking in terms of storytelling in video games, and
creating characters.
None of that is anywhere to be found in Donkey Kong 3.
There is no story.
There is no progression.
And most importantly, there is no ending.
Which was a hallmark of the series.
Mario rescues Pauline, Junior saves his dad…but Donkey Kong 3 doesn’t have anything like
that.
And even more than its gameplay, that’s what makes this one feel…so un-Donkey Kong.
Speaking of its gameplay, though…uh, Donkey Kong 3 is a shooter.
Weird, right?
The whole idea is, you have to blast DK with bug spray, while also blasting the bugs that
he shakes from the nests.
And it actually plays great—I mean, it’s a solid concept.
And I think, had the game done more with it, it could’ve made for a good Donkey Kong
concept, too.
But there’s just so much missing here.
I mean, for starters, there’s only two levels.
Maybe three…depending on how you feel about color swaps.
And think back to the first two games.
Every level introduced a new idea, whether it was removing rivets, climbing the vines,
platforms that move, that damn bouncy thing…
Donkey Kong 3 doesn’t do that.
These levels sort of, just…stay the same.
Like, both of them.
So the gameplay, which is already weird…also comes across as more repetitive, and less
engaging.
And without those narrative charms, it just feels like any other arcade shooter.
But you know, even with its shortcomings, there are a few things to like here.
Like I said, the game plays well.
And Donkey Kong 3 takes place in a greenhouse, which is kind of an adorable idea.
That Donkey Kong would break into this greenhouse because he thinks it’s a jungle, I like
that a lot.
And since it’s a greenhouse, it does look like a jungle.
And Donkey Kong, Jr. did this, too, but…in retrospect, it’s a nice aesthetic bridge
between the original game’s urban setting…and the lush jungles that would define Donkey
Kong Country.
Plus, that Donkey Kong sprite is just awesome.
It’s big, it’s expressive…
I think we’d all be expressive.
With…butt spray.
They say “to err is human.”
Well, turns out monkeys err, too.
But that’s the thing, nobody’s perfect.
I mean, who hasn’t done things they’d rather forget about?
Even the best of us make mistakes.
What matters is that we learn from them.
And maybe that’s all that matters.
I mean, why dwell on your failures…when you’ve had so much greatness?
I mean, Oliver Stone had Alexander.
Charles Dickens had Martin Chuzzlewitt.
So Donkey Kong had Donkey Kong 3.
And yeah, it’s not the best game, but it came before and after some of the best games,
ever.
And that’s why it doesn’t really matter.
Sorry, Stanley.
And that’s why the only thing you see in those eyes…is greatness.
And hunger, he’s…he’s a wild animal, he eats almost constantly.
It’s Donkey Kong 3, for the Nintendo Entertainment System.
Thanks to our good friend Marc from Fresh Meadows, New York, for sending it to the show.