Why do women fake orgasms? What's really behind it? Is it a good thing or a bad thing? How to tell
if she's faking it? And how to make sure that all of her future orgasms are real? Don't go
anywhere! We're going to explore all of that. My name is Helena Nista and I make videos that help
you have the best sex of your life. And today, we're exploring the complex world of female fake
orgasms and how to prevent them from happening. So, I must admit that I have done it once. Once
in my entire life I did fake an orgasm. I was with a new lover and he was giving me oral sex.
It wasn't fantastic and after a while I just knew that I wasn't going to come. But I was
still enjoying being with him so I wanted to do something different: kissing, intercourse,
anything else! And he wouldn't listen to me, he wouldn't stop. So I figured that the only
way to move on and to get him to leave my clit alone was to fake it. And I did. And afterwards
I felt terrible! I felt so bad about being dishonest with someone about my sexual experience
that I promised to myself that I would never do it again. So, do all women fake orgasms? No,
not all of them. Some do and some don't. And after watching this video, you'll be able to tell the
difference. But let's see first of all why women do it. There are many different reasons why a
woman would decide to fake an orgasm. Maybe she doesn't actually know how to come with a partner.
A lot of women can climax alone but they struggle when they are with a lover.
Maybe she's finding it difficult to communicate about her sexual needs and so she doesn't know how
to tell you what she needs to orgasm. She might be also trying to protect your feelings. Women
do realize just how much it means to you guys to make us come. So they might fake it at times when
their bodies are just not responding to the kind of erotic stimulation that would normally work.
It might be also that she's just not enjoying the kind of sex that you're having together
so she's faking it so she can end sex and go to sleep. Also, some women have been faking it
for such a long time now that they are lost as to how to get out of that cycle of faking it in bed.
And what you guys need to realize is that men can often put a lot of pressure on a woman to climax.
They're not doing it deliberately - usually - but that pressure is there. Whenever I hear from a
male client: "but I really want her to orgasm!" or "but I really enjoy it when she orgasms"
I know immediately what's going on. And there's typically a bit of male ego mixed in here,
that is really desiring to bring his partner to orgasm to get that sort of proof that he did well,
that he is a great lover. And I absolutely get it because all of these men are really coming from
a great place, they genuinely want to see their partner enjoy herself and have wonderful orgasms.
But what you need to also understand is this: when you're putting too much pressure on her to orgasm,
when her orgasm becomes really, really important, then you're actually making it much more difficult
for her to climax. Because the best orgasms happen when we're relaxed, when we're not actually
trying to orgasm, when we're just enjoying the pleasure, the arousal, the excitement
and then whoa! an orgasm just happens. But when we're stressed and worried about trying to come,
when we're struggling and efforting to get there, the climax is going to be pretty average - if it
happens at all! A lot of different things can make orgasming tricky for her: worries, stress,
fatigue, distractions, busy mind, etc. And that's okay, that's a part of being a human. Orgasm
doesn't need to be a part of sex every time. So I do encourage you to chill about it and to let
go of the idea that she needs to climax with you. Because truly great sex is about much more than
just the orgasm. As a general rule I'd say no, faking it is not a good thing. It strengthens
bad habits, it teaches him to do what doesn't work and it basically teaches men how to be bad lovers.
Plus, it just keeps this unhealthy lie between the two of you. However, there is one situation where
I'd say that it's okay to fake it and it's when she's on a journey of healing or exploring her
orgasmic potential. And when a bit of faking it till you make it can help. Of course, I wouldn't
encourage any woman to lie to her lover about it. But sometimes when reaching a climax is tricky,
putting herself in the state of mind of choosing to orgasm can be actually helpful to get her body
to follow suit. There are a few different things that happen to a woman's body when she orgasms
that you can use as a guideline to see if her orgasm is genuine. Listen to the sounds that
she's making. Are they a bit forced, like she is acting rather than having a real climax? Real
orgasmic sounds are kind of hard to control. And yes, they might sound awkward or strange.
But they should never sound like a performance. Also look at her body. Is her climax moving
through her system? When we orgasm we really experience something that we can't control
but rather that controls us. So in a real orgasm she might arch her body or tense and then relax,
she might grab onto you or shake and shiver, etc. There's often this pink blush covering her face
and chest. Her breathing becomes different. If you're not noticing any of these bodily reactions,
she might be faking it. Think about the build up that led to this orgasm. Was there a real
sense of climbing the arousal ladder until she finally reached the top? Or did her orgasm just
kind of happen without any noticeable build-up? Because if it did, it might not have been genuine.
And finally, what was she like after her orgasm? Typically we all need a bit of a recovery time,
we need some time to come back to earth and to lose that ecstatic glow. So if she's pretty much
back to normal after she came, that might be a warning sign. So now that you know how to tell if
she's faking it, it's a good idea to explore ways to make sure that she doesn't have to anymore.
First of all, have a chat to her about it. Lovingly and honestly express to her your
concerns that her orgasms might not have been real and that you really want to improve your
sex life together. Also remember that what women usually need to orgasm is to feel very relaxed,
safe, comfortable in their bodies. And any sense of pressure or stress that she needs to come and
that she might not be able to, will be creating a challenge for her. Maybe you can even ask her
to teach you how to make her come. Most women know what works best for them and they can show
you. Because if she can orgasm alone, that means that you can learn and you can give her blissful
orgasms on a regular basis. And if you really want to upgrade your sexual skills in the bedroom,
make sure to enroll in my online course Tantric Mastery For Men. It will teach you how to be an
extraordinary lover, how to last in bed as long as you want and how to touch her body in a variety of
ecstatic, blissful and orgasmic ways. You'll find the link to the program in the description below.
Please, make sure to also leave me a 'Like' and a comment below: have you ever questioned
whether your partner's orgasms were real? And what did you do about it? I hope that this video
helps you in creating much more genuine, deep and powerful orgasms with your lover. Thank
you so much for watching till the end. Have a fantastic day and I'll see you next time!