Hi there, this is Harry and welcome back to my English lessons where I try to give you
a better understanding of English.
The grammar, vocabulary, expressions, everything that you need.
Okay, so what are we going to talk to you about today?
Well, I thought we talk about verbs and verbs relating to persuading.
So when we want to persuade somebody, it's about getting them to change their mind.
Getting them to do something that you want them to do, even though they want to do something
else.
Generally getting them to have a shift in their particular opinion.
Okay, so there are lots of different verbs connected to that and expressions.
So let me give them to you.
And then we'll go down through them one by one, and hopefully, you'll get a better understanding
of how you might be able to use a few of them.
So let me go through them, explain them and give you an example.
Brainwash.
Well, this is a word we hear in all sorts of movies, whether it's about the demons,
or the dead, or somebody has to be brainwashed.
And the idea of somebody pouring lots of water into your head to get your brain clean.
So that might be the literal meaning of it.
But when we brainwash somebody, we get them to think the way we want them to think.
So when we used to watch these movies of the 1960s, or 70s, and if you fell into the wrong
hands of the enemy, they would try to brainwash you.
So you'd go around like a robot, okay.
So to be brainwashed thinking what you want to do.
So, when we are brainwashed, we might just use it, and a little bit of a joke to say,
Ah, yeah, those people have you brainwashed, you know, you think like the company, you
do like the company, you know, that's why I like to work for myself.
I hate to work for a company, because if you work for a company for a few years, they brainwash
you, you think only about their way of thinking you do things the way they want to do it,
you become a company man.
So you shouldn't allow yourself to be brainwashed.
So brainwash is getting somebody to change their mind or to think the way you want them
to think.
Next, to bring somebody around.
When we bring them around, we mean to bring them around to your way of thinking.
So you do that by a bit of prolonged negotiation, a bit of prolonged persuasion, you know, or
when you use expressions like, Well, you know, if I were you, this is what I would do.
And you know, what will happen?
If you do it that way, I think a better way to do it might be to approach it this way.
You know, I think it's take a little bit of time, but you know what I know it's the best
way to do it.
So gradually, you begin to drop in little hints or give them little pointers or little
ideas.
And eventually what will happen is, they will come around to your way of thinking or Yeah,
actually, the more I think of it, that I think you're right, I think that's the best way
to do it.
So presto, bingo, you've succeeded, you've got them around to your way of thinking.
So to bring somebody around means to work on them, slowly and gradually, until eventually,
they think the way you want them to think or they agree with your idea, your plan, whatever
it might be.
Next, to butter somebody up and yeah, literally take a knife, get the butter, which when you're
buttering a piece of bread.
And when I have my bread, I like to put plenty of butter on it.
And often people say would you like some bread with that butter?
No, put so much butter on it.
So when you butter somebody up, you are trying to persuade them to do what you want them
to do but you're using a lot of nice words, and you're using persuasion in that way.
And you're trying to get them to feel good about themselves and say, Oh, come on, you
know, you're really good at this.
And there's nobody can do it better than you.
So you know, come on, give it a go.
And this Oh, yes.
And people love to have their egos polished.
So if you polish somebody's ego enough, then they probably will do what you want them to
do and they will be persuaded and they will change their mind.
Yeah.
Okay.
So to butter somebody up means to find out something that will make them feel good to
put them in a good mood so that when you do ask them for something, or you do suggest
that they they change something, then they're more likely to agree with you than to disagree
with you.
So you butter them up, to make them feel good about themselves.
To fob somebody off.
When when we fob somebody off, it means we...
we don't want to meet them.
We try to avoid them, we to try to avoid contact and if we do have contact with them.
We make some excuses that we don't want to talk to them or when we're not going to help
them.
Okay, so I Yeah, look, I call you back later.
Okay, I'm busy.
At the moment, perhaps you will catch up in the next couple of days.
Well, why don't you just send me an email about what you're suggesting?
And I'll have a look at it.
So all excuses why you don't want to talk to that person at that particular time.
So you fob them off with some excuse.
Ah, look, I'm not really in the mood today.
Or look, I'm up to my eyes.
I've got to get this presentation finished and what why didn't we touch base in a couple
of days.
And you really hope that by then, in a couple of days, they'll have forgotten what they
wanted.
But if they're persistent, you'll just fob them off a little bit more.
So to fob somebody off means to give them some excuses or make some excuses, hoping
that they will go away, hoping that they won't continue to annoy you.
And that eventually, they'll just give up and they'll go on and I somebody else.
Yeah.
So we can use it if we are having a chat to our friends.
And they say, Well, did you manage to talk to your boss about that pay rise you wanted?
Ah, you know, he just fobbed me off with some excuse that the company couldn't afford it.
We're going through difficult times.
It's not really the time of the year, we only talk about salary increases after the company
results, you know, the usual things they talk about.
So yeah, he just fobbed me off with some excuse.
I've heard it all before I'm, I'm really fed up.
So that would be working on the other side where you're trying to persuade him to give
you a salary rise, and he isn't really interested in listening to you.
And yeah, he fobbed you off with some excuse.
To cajole somebody, cajole means to plámás somebody or to, to, to make sure that you
again, you polish their ego, make them feeling good about themselves.
And generally, you talk nicely to them.
And you've, you use a lot of flattery, to get your way or to persuade them to do things
the way you want them to do it.
Okay, so you keep saying things like, Oh, come on, you know, you're good at this.
You know, there's nobody else can do it.
You know, they're really liked to hear from you.
Yeah, I really know you want to do it.
I'll help you.
I'll, I'll prepare everything, but I just need you to do this.
Yeah.
So you work on the person, bit by bit.
And eventually, yeah, they agreed to do what you want them to do.
Daughters.
My daughter was really good at this.
When she was younger, she would cajole you.
Ah, come on, dad, you know.
You'd love to have a pet around the house.
It would be cute.
A little kitten, you know.
Forgetting that of course little kittens turn it to be big cats.
Yeah.
Ah, come on, I'd really look after it.
I'll feed it in the morning, I'll empty the litter tray.
Lots of flattery.
And then eventually you you're persuaded and you change your mind and you say, Okay, go
on.
Let's get a kitten but mind only one.
And of course once you say that, that's it, you've... you've given in, you've surrendered.
And they or your daughter, in my case, has persuaded you to do what they want you to
do.
And you knew all along that you're really going to agree with it anyway.
Wheedle.
Strange word to wheedle to wheedle.
And we use the expression to wheedle something out of somebody.
So it's like getting a little fork or a screwdriver, and eventually getting what you want.
It's in there somewhere else.
I'll get it.
So when we wheedle something out to somebody, we keep asking them the questions.
What...
What was that about?
What happened there?
Or what did he say next?
And what's planned?
Or do you know what's going to happen next week?
And they are so they keep looking for more information.
You say, Look, I don't know any... anything more.
I really have given you all the information I know.
Well, you know... you must have spoken about this.
And maybe he talked about that.
So again, they ask another question.
And bit by bit, you eventually give them as much information as you have.
All the information that they are interested in, and they've succeeded in wheedling or
getting the information out of you.
So it's like pulling the intestines out of something you know, just bit by bit bit by
bit eventually, blop, they've got everything okay.
So they wheedle something out of you slowly.
Yeah.
No pain involved, but eventually, they get all of the story.
It's like mothers.
You know, mod...
Mothers are really good at wheedling stories.
They come home and they see son or daughter in a bad mood.
And Do you want to talk about it?
No, no, no, no, no.
But eventually, the whole story comes out.
And mum, as mums do, have been very successful in wheedling out the information out of the
daughter.
Okay.
Hustle.
And be careful here with the pronunciation.
Hustle.
Yes, hustle, hustle, hustle.
Okay, so when we hustle?
Yeah, we try and we try and we keep trying.
Until we see succeed.
Yeah.
So, to hustle means to keep pushing to, to keep at somebody, or try as hard as you can
to get the answer that you want.
So when we hustle, we...
we want to get somebody to to change their mind about something.
Come on, come on.
Look, you know you'd like to buy this.
It's a really, really good deal.
You're not going to get a better deal anywhere else.
I mean, this car...
Look, I've had it for a couple of years, never had any problems with it.
I'll tell you what, take it for a test drive.
Yeah.
Even better still, take it for the night.
And the person knows that once they get you into the car, once you've got your foot on
that accelerator.
Yeah, you're probably more than 50% there.
So when you come back 24 hours later.
Well, what did you think about that?
Did you enjoy it?
oh, yeah, it was great.
It's one of the best cars I've ever driven.
Yeah, you see, I told you.
So.
What do you think we about doing the deal, I'll give you a good price.
So to hustle to keep pushing, and pressing and hoping and working away until the person...
Yeah.
Signs the dotted line, gets the car keys goes home, a happy man.
To hustle.
Talk somebody into something.
Well, we've all tried sometimes successfully, sometimes unsuccessfully, to talk somebody
into doing something.
It might be that holiday of a lifetime.
You know, you want to do it.
You've never taken enough time off work.
Those people owe you lots and lots of days.
So why don't we just go off?
Have that second honeymoon that you promised me?
Do you remember that?
You told me that years ago, we'd have a second honeymoon.
Well, here's the chance.
Yeah.
So this offer, we probably won't get a better offer.
You know, the weather's really good at this time of the year.
It's a direct flight now.
So we only need to get that one flight.
So you talk somebody into something.
Okay, if you really want to do it, let's go.
It's about time we did something for ourselves.
So to talk somebody into something.
Next to urge.
Well, we all have an urge to do something.
So in that way we use it as a noun, an urge.
To urge somebody is to push, you know, and push strongly.
I really urge, if you wanted to use the verb, I really urge you to consider this seriously.
So somebody is really going to take a look at this Can I urge you please to give this
careful consideration?
You know, we won't get many better chances.
So it's something that we really have to look at.
So it could be telling the boss about some change in the plans, it can be telling your
kids to do some more study.
Ah, look, I really would urge you for the last few months of the term to do an extra
little bit of work, it'll really pay off.
I mean, there's no point cramming all the study in for the last two weeks, spread it
out over the next few months, you'll feel much better, I really would encourage you,
I really would urge you to listen to me.
You don't listen to me enough, but really you'll thank me in the long run.
So to urge somebody.
So to persuade them to come around to your way of thinking.
And finally, to rope somebody in.
That sounds quite a strange expression.
To rope somebody in.
If you've ever watched the cowboy, the old cowboy movies they used to have a rope for
capturing horses or cows so they would lasso.
They would throw the rope, put it around the cow, the cow or the horse's neck, pull it,
and then gradually pull the horse or the cow into them and then wrap the rope... rope around
them.
And then brand the horse or the cow with the branding iron.
Yeah, so very painful by the look of it.
So that's literally to rope somebody in.
So when you rope somebody in, it's the same idea, you've got something you want to talk
to them about you give them the idea.
And then you rope them in gradually, well, you know, this will be a good idea.
And you know, it makes sense.
And you know, that's going to save time, gradually, little bit of this and a little bit of that.
And they come around to your way of thinking.
So your rope somebody in.
Example.
So you're a member of the local football team, or you're a member of the local rugby team,
whatever the sport happens to be.
And like all of these teams, they have a club and a clubhouse.
They have committees, and they're always doing fundraising events because they need to get
some extra money to improve the pitches, to change the showers, whatever it happens to
be.
And of course, they like to find volunteers to raise money, volunteers to do a bit of
painting, volunteers to train the young kids.
Okay, so you've had your time playing football or rugby.
And now it's time to get a little bit back and perhaps to share some of your spare time
with the kids so you get roped into training the kids on a Saturday morning or a Sunday
morning.
You get roped into taking the kids to the games away from home so bit by bit you get
roped in to do it.
So to get roped or persuaded into doing something.
Okay so they're all verbs and expressions related to persuading, getting somebody to
do what you want them to do.
So let them... let me give them to you one more time.
Brainwash.
Bring somebody around to your way of thinking.
Butter somebody up.
To use lots of flattery.
Fob somebody off.
Means to get rid of them with some excuse.
Cajole somebody.
Again to use flattery to get them to... to do something because you tell them they're
the best in the world.
Cajole.
To wheedle something out of somebody.
To find out information bit by bit.
Hustle, to hustle.
Talk somebody into something.
Urge somebody to do something, and finally, rope somebody into doing what you want them
to do.
Okay, excellent.
So all of those verbs related to persuading.
Try a few of them, see, can you introduce them into your English.
Try not to use them all, of course, but to try and use a few, write about them.
And if you have any problems, you know where I am, you can contact me any time.
Thanks for listening.
Join me again soon.